Since it's wedding day: if you planned your wedding now...

[lasagnasshole]

...how would it differ from what you did?

I don't regret anything we did for our wedding, but my tastes have changed some.

For the reception, I'd do brunch. I'd have:

Omelet bar
Waffle bar
Bloody Mary Bar
Fancy mimosas
Baskets of bacon for centerpieces
Donuts instead of cake

Too bad it would be totally weird (and prohibitively expensive) to throw a giant party like this for our 10th anniversary.

[Deleted]

Can we have a double 2nd wedding? I mean our anniversary is the same day...

NOM NOM

[kadams767]

About the wedding itself, probably nothing. My wedding day was great.

I wish I would have splurged on really fancy shoes, though. If there was one time to buy $700 shoes without guilt, that was it. Oh well.

[hopenotlost]

I would wear a strapless dress rather than a halter dress like I did. I still do love my dress, but I will probably never wear a strapless dress again in my life, so I wish I had done it for my wedding.

I would take a pic with my mom so she would STFU about it. Six years later, and I still hear about it. Sorry, you didn't mention wanting a pic with me, and you and I are not close, so it didn't even occur to me.

I would have had the reception at the lake and not worried about the music and no alcohol policy. Our wedding guests were gone by 10 anyways, and not a lot of them are big drinkers so it wouldn't have mattered.

[Susie]

1. I would spend more on a better photographer.
2. I would take the beach photos that we did not get (bad weather) the first time around.
3. I would put more lip gloss on and maybe do some makeup touchups during the day.

Those are really the big ones for me. Other than those things, which didn't really affect my experience of the day itself, I really enjoyed our wedding.

I know a lot of people debate the videographer thing.  We did not have one, and I am still comfortable with that decision 7 years later.

[shortstax]

I would have paired down my wedding party from 7 bridesmaids to 4-5 max.

Otherwise the day was perfect.

[Deleted]

One of my big regrets is that we didn't think to set up croquet on the lawn for cocktail hour.

And I should have worn comfier shoes. The ones I wore were brutal.

[winnied]

I'd do what I originally wanted to do and not let myself get bullied by my mother.

A tiny friends and family wedding (like no 2nd, 3rd, and 4th cousins) followed by dinner at a favorite restaurant. No giant ballroom. No giant cake.

Or, I'd elope.

[lasagnasshole]

Oh, and I'd have no bridal party.

And my mother wouldn't be in charge of toasts, meaning there wouldn't be SEVEN goddamned toasts.

And I wouldn't rule out doing a church wedding again, but I would only do so if I had a little more flexibility in the ceremony. I really wanted to read a passage from the Supreme Judicial Court of Massachusetts, but only approved Scriptures were allowed. LAME.

[mbcdefg]

I was really happy with our wedding. Good company, no drama, good food and plenty of booze, and a reasonable cost for our area. Sometimes I wish I had gotten a dress with some sort of sleeve or jacket, rather than strapless, but I really liked the dress. And sometimes I wish I'd gotten a fancier veil but that's not a big deal. And I *really* wanted our reception to be at a local science museum with great NYC skyline views, but the prices were astronomical.

If I was forced to do it over again today, I'd have a civil ceremony since I don't go to church anymore. I'd get a really nice cocktail dress or formal dress in a non-white color, and treat myself to pro hair and makeup plus some really nice shoes and jewelry. If I couldn't afford the museum reception then I'd find a really good restaurant and just do everything there - I liked our banquet hall reception but it's just the same ol' thing for North Jersey weddings, so a hip restaurant would be nice.

A big cocktail hour with lots of different appetizers, and then a tasting menu for dinner, followed by a delicious wedding cake and lots of other yummy desserts on small plates so people could try everything. Open bar with top shelf liquor and good beer and wine. I'd invite 50-75 people that we see on a regular basis, no distant relatives that we have to invite just out of courtesy. I love my mom and would want here there, but it'd be great if someone could magically make her stop acting like she's in charge of everything and keep her from doing things to attract more attention to herself.

I think MH would mainly care about the pricing, having really good/rare beer available, and good food. I can't decide whether he'd want to wear something more casual since he hates dressing up, or if he'd want a really well-cut suit/tux so that he looked elegant.

ETA: Same photographer since he was awesome, and ditto for the florist and DJ. No regrets on not hiring a videographer. Although I'm extremely glad that a friend thought to take a video of my father-daughter dance. No bridal party, although I'd be happy to have the same one if we had to (my siblings and two friends) but I'd just ask them to wear anything they wanted.

[pacificrules]

Change:
Wouldn't care as much about everything being match-matchy (bridesmaids dresses, tablecloths, etc)
Would spend more on the venue
Wouldn't have it on a Friday
Stupid Precious Moments cake topper
Get an actual professional DJ

Keep the same:
Small-ish guest list 
Small bridal party
Bar set-up/staff
Caterer and food
Cake

[noodleoo]

I'd spend less money. Our wedding was awesome, but in the end, it was one day that passed by so fast I barely remember it. We could have taken a few kickass vacations for the money we spent. I think I'd something low key/cheaper and use the money for vacations or our house instead.

[Deleted]

Aside from the fact that my groom sucked and the marriage didn't last, I actually really liked my wedding. It was a lot of work but things turned out nicely and I don't honestly know what I'd do different. Maybe have a bigger budget so I didn't have to do as much work, but I could barely stomach spending what we did on 1 day so I'm not sure I'd actually use a larger budget.

Actually, to a point I wish we'd done something small and simple but I realize my hindsight perspective is a bit tainted by the fact that it all turned out to be a waste in the end. And I'm glad I had the experience. It still stands out as one of the most fun days of my life because my family and friends were in one place and I had a blast with all of them.

[ddi741]

I don't know that I would change anything other than our pianist (sp).  She showed up in black jeans and an orange down vest.  She was the only one the church would allow but looking back now I should have just had my friend play. We got married in a college chapel and no one from the church would have known.

I also might change my photos. I love them but now there are so many more options other than "traditional" photography.  I like the 'magazine style' or whatever it's called.

I still love my dress and one of these days my H is going to come home and find me wearing it

I would love to have multiple weddings though - the one I had,  then a beach wedding, a vegas wedding , a wedding on a plantation in Charleston.  I wish I could do one each year. 
I love weddings.

[raangoli]

I really liked my dress, but I did not love it. I might spend more time finding one that was just perfect.

[aurora]

Honestly, I would have more seriously tried to convince H to elope. I hated being the center of attention.

It was fun to see all our friends and family, though, so I don't regret throwing the party.

[hamster]

Honestly, I think all I'd change is my dress. I'm over strapless.

[lime]

I wouldn't change much. I didn't get married until I was 32 and we went pretty minimal, so it was about as far from BB pretty princess day as one can get.

I'd have dealt with my dysfunctional family a bit better from the get go, but I could pretty much use that as an answer to most things in my life.

[matildasun]

I originally planned on doing my own flowers. We went with a florist. If I did it again I might do my own flowers, and I might not.

[jinkies]

Jul 2, 2014 10:41:21 GMT -5 winnied said:

I'd do what I originally wanted to do and not let myself get bullied by my mother.

A tiny friends and family wedding (like no 2nd, 3rd, and 4th cousins) followed by dinner at a favorite restaurant. No giant ballroom. No giant cake.

Or, I'd elope.

This. I was strong-armed by family (and even my husband, to a degree), into having a traditional 150-person wedding. It was fine, for what it was, but I got stuck with all the planning and it is not my thing at all. I would have much preferred something very small, in a nice, non-wedding dress, with a fancy restaurant dinner to follow. 

I've been married 10 years, and I still cringe when I think how much money my parents spent on my wedding, but it's what they wanted. 

[jewel]

I would have invited about 50 fewer people.

[rbp]

We'd get married in Atlanta rather than in my hometown.
A lace sheath rather than big A-line gown
String quartet at the ceremony
Better food and cake
Smaller wedding party
Shuttle from hotel to all wedding events
And a photographer who will turn over the digital files

We had an open bar, an awesome band, and I think people had fun...so we're good on those fronts

[pinkdutchtulips]

Jul 2, 2014 10:49:46 GMT -5 @buckybells said:

Aside from the fact that my groom sucked and the marriage didn't last, I actually really liked my wedding. It was a lot of work but things turned out nicely and I don't honestly know what I'd do different. Maybe have a bigger budget so I didn't have to do as much work, but I could barely stomach spending what we did on 1 day so I'm not sure I'd actually use a larger budget.

Actually, to a point I wish we'd done something small and simple but I realize my hindsight perspective is a bit tainted by the fact that it all turned out to be a waste in the end. And I'm glad I had the experience. It still stands out as one of the most fun days of my life because my family and friends were in one place and I had a blast with all of them.

i'm w bucky on this one .... wish i could change the groom bc the marriage didn't last !  i actually liked my wedding - it was small, intimate and i LOVED our location. there were alot of personal touches to it (my gpa did the ceremony, our love of football was incorporated into our dueling football helmets caketopper) and i'm glad that we were able to pull together a decent wedding in an VERY hcol area for a fraction of what other people paid. years after the event, people told me that they loved our wedding simply bc it was so intimate and personal.

[jene]

Invited less people

[Deleted]

Nothing. 7 years later I'm still happy with everything or don't care about it enough to go back and change it (our videographer was terrible but I don't really care).

[countthestars]

I wouldn't change anything.

[L]

I would not have had a wedding party. Although we thought at the time that we'd always and forever have those people in our lives, we are not close to them anymore and I wish I had kept things just us. I wish we had spent more time taking photos taken with family instead of the bridal party we aren't super close to anymore.

I would not have gone to Costa Rica for our honeymoon.

[M]

If we could do over, we would fly 15 of our closest friends and family to Bora Bora a few days before the wedding, put them up in over water bungalows, get married on the beach, then send them home while we stay for our honeymoon. It would have been more intimate, less planning, and cost the same as what we did spend on our wedding.

On the wedding itself, I wouldn't change much. I would have done e-pics so that I would have known not to use MILs friend as a photographer. I wouldn't have invited so many of her friends that I didn't know. She pressured me and I was so soft then. I would have splurged more but then again I can afford more now...like on my limo. I should have done the Hummerzine!! But I couldn't stomach $2500 at the time. Overall, everyone had a great time which was my main goal.

[WinterWine]

I absolutely loved our wedding day and how everything went!! We had a small weekend getaway and hosted 60ppl- it was prefect. The only thing I wish I had done was have a professional videographer- but just couldn't afford it. We have a video, but it was taken by my uncle and lower quality.

I have a friend that 3 months post wedding said she would have changed everything- it's sad to hear that, and I'm glad it's not my sentiment.

[crashgizmo]

I got lucky and got a do-over when I remarried. DH and I had both been married before and when we got engaged we both sat down and said what we would change about our first weddings:

We had a destination wedding
I had a strapless dress
We paid more for a photographer and gave them the shots we wanted
DH wore flip flops.