I didn't care to find out but my husband kept pestering me after every doctor's appointment I had if the doctor had told me gender. Uh no, she didn't tell me because I didn't ask. Finally I said if you want to know, you have to come to one of the appointments and ask the doctor yourself. So he came to a scan done at 16 weeks I think and the MFM told us. She did make us guess at and then made us wait a good 10 minutes before revealing. But then I made him keep it a secret until 30 weeks when we made the gender reveal our main shower game.
Post by jerzgirl25 on Jul 13, 2014 19:45:30 GMT -5
Team Green here! Even though I am by nature a planner, I always thought if I had a child, I'd want to be surprised at the delivery. It made the anticipation of birth so sweet; dh and I loved discussing the possibilities of a boy/girl. A favorite memory from birth was me asking dh "what is it??" And him saying "I don't know, "it's facing the wrong way!" Then midwife turned him around and dh said we have a son, omg!! We had also told the midwife and nurse to please not tell us the sex at birth. I had a med free birth, incidentally. Not sure if there is any correlation.
We didn't find out with DD and aren't this time either. I didn't want to find out initially because I knew I and everyone else would overbuy gendered things if we found out. Now we're easily able to reuse everything we bought with DD. You need the same things if it's a boy or girl, so I don't fully understand the preparation argument.
This is the main reason I don't want to find out. Both MIL and SIL insisted that we find out last pregnancy and they said we were weird for not wanting to know. BUT they both would buy everything in either pink or blue and I don't like pink, so I don't want anything pink.
My mom rushed out as soon as DD was born to buy all the pink! But I am glad we have a lot of neutrals too. And don't get me wrong, we dress DD pretty girlie and just painted her room pink, but I didn't want to define her as a pink girl from the beginning. And really, my compulsive shopping was more of a concern. I anxiety shop and buying clothes for a undefined sex was a little less fun, so it really helped rein my shopping in.
Post by Jalapeñomel on Jul 13, 2014 20:24:35 GMT -5
I think it would be fun to be team green and find out in the delivery room! I wish I had the self-control (and the fact that I am a nosy, know-it-all) to do it.
I think this post solidified that I don't want to know
Despite all of the benefits of knowing that y'all mentioned (most of which DH said too) I still think it would be fun to wait. We'll see what happens...
What did you do last time? Maybe do the opposite this time?
Post by Velar Fricative on Jul 13, 2014 20:53:36 GMT -5
I wanted a med-free birth but didn't get one (Team Green).
It is an interesting thing to think about though. While not all Team Greeners I know had med-free births, everyone I know who had a med-free birth was Team Green.
We found out every time. With DS1 I was just downright impatient. With DS2, DS1 was insistent that it was a brother, and I wanted to be able to prep him if that wasn't the case. With DS3, I wanted to be able to make peace with the idea of never having a daughter before delivering my sweet boy. Finding out was right for us.
I couldn't care less what other people do on this front and find it to be an odd issue to be evangelical about.
And I'm pretty sure we would have known with C even if we had tried not to. They put the ultrasound probe on my belly and wham, penis. It was really obvious.
I had a growth ultrasound done and when the tech was getting his leg measurement I swear his testicles took up half of the screen. I'm not one that can tell what I'm looking at easily and it was really obvious. Although a small part of me is worried that he is going to have freakishly large testicles.
H wanted to be team green. He just liked thr idea pf it. He very rarely has a strong opinion about anything so I agreed to be team green with J. I actually really liked being team green so we were again the second time.
I think this post solidified that I don't want to know
Despite all of the benefits of knowing that y'all mentioned (most of which DH said too) I still think it would be fun to wait. We'll see what happens...
We happily found out with DS (and I don't regret that one bit.)
Since we're probably only having 2 children, I think it would be fun to have this one as a delivery surprise. DH does not. ha
There are a few medical reasons it's good to know. For instance, I wanted to know that DS's testicles had dropped or not, and boys can have some urination and kidney concerns in utero.
I also want to be able to hash out details like circ decisions if it's a boy
To the first point, wouldn't this be looked at in the anatomy scan anyway, whether the technician/doctor are telling you what the baby's sex is or not?
To point two, I've already lined up a mohel just in case. It seemed like an overwhelming task at first, but ended up being a lot easier to deal with than things like car seat decisions. (We have borrowed a car seat to come home from the hospital, but still haven't decided what we're doing long term.)
Post by curbsideprophet on Jul 14, 2014 8:19:22 GMT -5
I know for DD they just noted that the anatomy was normal. They can tell you to look away when they are checking that part if you do not want to know. It was not a big deal that we did not find out the sex.
I suppose there might be a few issues that are sex specific and you might need to find out early, but this seems like it would be rare. I have not met anyone who wanted to wait and needed to be told the sex because of a medical issue.