Confront or call management?

[Deleted]

Quick backstory: R is my upstairs neighbor is a single woman with no children who I've been friendly with on occasion since I moved in 2 years ago.  We all have one bedroom apartments here.  R was dating a guy last year briefly then broke up, now back together.  He's an unemployed, still married father of 3 kids.

Current issue: 
R's BF and 3 kids have moved in.  The kids are about age 9-13.  They are loud and obnoxious.  Playing in hallway, coming in and out, slamming front door, yelling, hallway has become a depot of bikes, skateboards, empty cups, basketballs.  

 J is increasingly frustrated as well - as he is off all summer and contends with this all day.
He said he's giving it a few days and wants to bring it up to them.  I'm not good at confronting people, so I'd rather call management.

what says SO? 

[Deleted]

CONFRONT. Holy shit CONFRONT. Borrow J's balls and walk up there and tell them to clean up the mess and stop acting like heathens.
I would have lost my damn mind the first week this nonsense ensued.

[LoveBug]

Aren't there regulations about how many people may reside in a rental based on the # of bedrooms?

Ugh sounds like a nightmare. Call management.

[Deleted]

Jul 18, 2014 20:57:35 GMT -5 LoveBug said:

Aren't there regulations about how many people may reside in a rental based on the # of bedrooms?

Ugh sounds like a nightmare. Call management.

I'm unsure of the regulations. It is a nightmare.

[LoveBug]

Any lease I have ever signed had a section on how many people could reside in the space. It depended on the # of bedrooms. I've leased often (from 1 bedroom to a 4 bedroom) and have lived in 3 states (so worldly, I know! Lol). But hopefully there is something in your lease as well.

[pinkhighheels]

I would call, I dislike confronting neighbors I always fear they will retaliate. Could you just make an anonymous complaint?

[glitzyglow]

I would call and let the landlord deal with it.

[MyName]

Call. You don't need to start a feud. Complain to management and let them deal with it; there is almost definitely a lease violation.

[1confused1]

Other side of the coin, being a landlord, talk to the tenants first and see if you can resolve it. If that doesn't, then go to management.

[Deleted]

pinkhighheels and @myname, i do fear starting a feud.  This chick can be pretty feisty to be honest.  As for anonymous- I would love for it to be anonymous.  However, the management knows everyone pretty well and there are only 6 units in each building. So, I guess I could write something anonymously, but I'm not sure how that would work.  

[Deleted]

Jul 19, 2014 0:38:37 GMT -5 1confused1 said:

Other side of the coin, being a landlord, talk to the tenants first and see if you can resolve it. If that doesn't, then go to management.

I know that's probably the "right" thing to do, but I'm just another tenant here.  We both pay rent and if no one else is saying anything, I feel uncomfortable. 

[1confused1]

Jul 19, 2014 0:44:44 GMT -5 @blueyes623 said:

Jul 19, 2014 0:38:37 GMT -5 1confused1 said:

Other side of the coin, being a landlord, talk to the tenants first and see if you can resolve it. If that doesn't, then go to management.

I know that's probably the "right" thing to do, but I'm just another tenant here.  We both pay rent and if no one else is saying anything, I feel uncomfortable. 

I will tell you, being from management, the first thing I am going to ask you is, "have you talked to them about your concerns?"  

I don't want to be your middle man, talk to them, if there is no improvement, then bring in management.

[Deleted]

Jul 19, 2014 0:48:07 GMT -5 1confused1 said:

Jul 19, 2014 0:44:44 GMT -5 @blueyes623 said:

I know that's probably the "right" thing to do, but I'm just another tenant here.  We both pay rent and if no one else is saying anything, I feel uncomfortable. 

I will tell you, being from management, the first thing I am going to ask you is, "have you talked to them about your concerns?"  

I don't want to be your middle man, talk to them, if there is no improvement, then bring in management.

I see your point.  However, I feel like this may be an issue beyond my control. 

[pl77]

Ugh, that sounds like a nightmare. I can see why you'd be concerned-either way they'll probably be able to guess it was you who complained...so I would probably confront them first . But I'd probably have shaking hands as I did it. I hate confrontation.

[parker]

I disagree with confused. This is a lease violation which is the landlords responsibility not the other tenants.

Music too loud, vacuuming at midnight, those are things a tenant should ask first then report. 4 people moving into a one bedroom and creating havoc is on management to confront.

[mcc]

I would let the LL handle it. Alert them from a safety perspective to get their attention. Putting it in writing via email, if you have that option, might be more effective than calling.

Dear LL,
Today I tripped on a skateboard/other random crap while carrying my groceries into my apartment. Lately the hallway has become a repository of trash and sporting equipment. I know that I can't control the slamming of doors or shouting in common ares [because you can't, but this points out that they're obnoxious], but perhaps the new tenant with the 3 children [will bring to their attn that there are new occupants] could be more mindful of keeping their belongings in their apartment instead of the hallway.

Thank you,
blueyes

[Deleted]

Jul 19, 2014 11:54:00 GMT -5 mcc said:

I would let the LL handle it. Alert them from a safety perspective to get their attention. Putting it in writing via email, if you have that option, might be more effective than calling.

Dear LL,
Today I tripped on a skateboard/other random crap while carrying my groceries into my apartment. Lately the hallway has become a repository of trash and sporting equipment. I know that I can't control the slamming of doors or shouting in common ares [because you can't, but this points out that they're obnoxious], but perhaps the new tenant with the 3 children [will bring to their attn that there are new occupants] could be more mindful of keeping their belongings in their apartment instead of the hallway.

Thank you,
blueyes

I like the way this is worded.  I don't have the option of email though.  I may do this on paper.  Unfortunately, I feel awkward about this and severely frustrated.  Why do people suck?

[Deleted]

Jul 19, 2014 11:01:49 GMT -5 pl77 said:

Ugh, that sounds like a nightmare. I can see why you'd be concerned-either way they'll probably be able to guess it was you who complained...so I would probably confront them first . But I'd probably have shaking hands as I did it. I hate confrontation.

I hate confrontation too.  Especially because I was friendly with her and I know she can have the tendency to be explosive.  I like the way mcc worded things.  I'm sure it will come out that it's me who complained, so I'm still on the fence.  

[sassycat]

First off, I feel for you. I live in an apt building, where the 2 kids next door, scream blue murder for most of the day when their Poppie is watching them. ( I have concerns) Also dealing with a barking dog for 8 hours a day. We have been told NEVER to confront neighbour as you never know the kind of person they are and that is for your own safety. This is a LL issue plain and simple. They are impeding on your comfort and peaceful surroundings. I hope it works out for you, but in NO way I would be confronting them on my own. Good luck, and if all else fails steal their balls. lol ( not really)

[1confused1]

Just curious, did you do anything?

[Deleted]

Jul 20, 2014 23:27:19 GMT -5 1confused1 said:

Just curious, did you do anything?

Not yet.  I plan to call at some point this week.

[Deleted]

As a landlord, this isn't your issue to deal with, it's mine. Call the landlord.

[1confused1]

Jul 22, 2014 16:17:39 GMT -5 piratequeen said:

Jul 19, 2014 0:48:07 GMT -5 1confused1 said:

I will tell you, being from management, the first thing I am going to ask you is, "have you talked to them about your concerns?"  

I don't want to be your middle man, talk to them, if there is no improvement, then bring in management.

No way - This is Management's/LL's job to deal with - 5 people in a 1 bedroom?  This doesn't bother you as Management?

I manage retail, that's how I would ask my tenants to deal with it. Different situation I guess.

And this is why I won't touch residential with a ten foot pole.