I'm starting to be swayed here. Lol. My H would love it if I did this- he's so pissed at the situation, too. He wants me to leave by flipping them off, grabbing a beer and pulling the emergency exit. You know, if I could somehow quit while on a plane.
Does your insurance remain effective until the end of your last month? If so, wait until after Friday to resign and you should still be covered under your insurance for your delivery, but will still have resigned before the start of the school year.
Sorry they sprung this on you. That sucks. You should have been grandfathered in. That HR lady was such a bitch!!
I'm sorry. I had a feeling that was why they were dragging their feet on telling you, which is really very shitty.
An anecdote - My former employer pulled some shady maternity leave bullshit with me WHILE I was already on leave with my first. Long story short, they had agreed to pay my leave and then 2 weeks in (and one week after giving birth no less) I found out through the OM (who was my friend and was letting me know as a friend off the record) that the partners had changed their minds. After a brief period of constant crying, I immediately starting looking for a new job, got an amazing offer, and resigned from my former firm. It worked out way better than I ever could have imagined. It is six years later, and I am now partner at that firm, and could not be happier with the arrangement. I guess what I'm trying to say is something way better is most likely in your future. You should be somewhere where they appreciate you, and not sit on this like assholes with no regard to the impact on you and your family. Good luck.
the shitty maternity leave policy in this country seriously pisses me off. you shouldn't be getting fucked over because you are a woman, having a child.
i really hope you are able to reach some kind of acceptable agreement with your dean today.
YES you should use their insurance to deliver! They're not looking out for you, and you're under no obligation to look out for them. Do what's best for your family! I'm so sorry this happened to you.
AND now because of all this shit, I will now be delivering under H's insurance instead of my own. Which means we'll be paying out almost $1,000 for copays for the hospital stay instead of the $0 it would have cost me under my insurance that we assumed I would be using. Great.
My mom was like "Go in and work, deliver, then tell them you can't come back. Fuck them- they're not looking out for you, why should you look out for them!" And I actually considered it for a flamefully long amount of time.
I would do it and I wouldn't even feel bad about it. Its just business to them, it should be just business to you.
Teachers go back next week, kids start the following week. So I'd only be working for a week or maybe two into this contract before delivering and then leaving. I'm telling my dean and the HR lady that I plan on working up until I deliver. I already signed my contract for this coming year, so they have to honor it.
Fuck bridges. I'll get letters of rec from previous employers and my coworkers.
I do feel super shitty about leaving the kids though. There are parents in my room whose kids I've taught before who made sure their kids were in my class. And now I'm going to be leaving them with god knows who. That's honestly one of the reasons I want to go back- maybe I can get it off on the right foot for the new teacher and not leave someone scrambling a week before school starts.
Don't tell her you won't be coming back. Wait until closer to the end of your leave. They have ways of making things more difficult.
I agree with this. They don't get to have it both ways. They pull the rug out and make the relationship adversarial, they don't get to call you looking out for your family "unprofessional" which is code for "making it harder for us to fuck you up". Take your leave, have H use one day to watch your squish so you return to work, then tell them you quit and ride off into the sunset at the end of the day and see how they like being fucked around with!
I think at the school I was previously at there was a clause in the leave paperwork about employees not returning after medical leave. Get a copy of yours and scour it before you make any decisions.
AND now because of all this shit, I will now be delivering under H's insurance instead of my own. Which means we'll be paying out almost $1,000 for copays for the hospital stay instead of the $0 it would have cost me under my insurance that we assumed I would be using. Great.
My mom was like "Go in and work, deliver, then tell them you can't come back. Fuck them- they're not looking out for you, why should you look out for them!" And I actually considered it for a flamefully long amount of time.
This isn't flameful. This is what you should do. Seriously.
I agreed until she mentioned letters of recommendation. Sorry, meganew, this situation bites.
Post by prettyinpink on Jul 30, 2014 9:37:05 GMT -5
Ugh. This is why I told DH we have to plan a late May baby.
Honestly I would work until you deliver, and then toward the very end of your leave let them know you aren't coming back this year. Babies are born plans change, they can deal with it.
When I was in college I worked for an optometrist, one of the staff got pregnant, took her leave and then FMLA leave (staff knew she wasn't coming back, Dr. and office manager did not). Toward the very end of her leave she let her know she wasn't coming back.
Bullshit like this is why I am so glad to be in a union even though I don't agree with everything they do. I'm so sorry you're being fucked over like this, megachoo.
Re: the letters of recommendation, only you know your dean and how she might handle the news that you're not going to come back after your leave is over. Whatever you do, do NOT tell her about that today. I've worked for administrators who would have gone out of their way to blackball me in the district if I had gone out on leave and then told them I wasn't coming back just as the leave was ending. I've also worked for administrators who were decent human beings, would have understood this decision completely, and would have hired me back in a heartbeat once I was ready to return to the classroom. I really hope that your dean is one of the latter types, and that you're able to get the maternity leave you should have gotten if your charter was acting in good faith with its employees.
Post by caffeinezzz on Jul 30, 2014 12:06:35 GMT -5
Just be ABSOLUTELY SURE YOU DO NOT HAVE TO PAY BACK THE INSURANCE IF YOU QUIT WHILE ON LEAVE (or immediately after). A lot of companies have that policy. If you deliver and then quit, they may make you pay back the insurance company. Find out your policy.
Just be ABSOLUTELY SURE YOU DO NOT HAVE TO PAY BACK THE INSURANCE IF YOU QUIT WHILE ON LEAVE (or immediately after). A lot of companies have that policy. If you deliver and then quit, they may make you pay back the insurance company. Find out your policy.
I do plan on find out first, but how do I do that without coming right out and telling them that's my plan?
Just be ABSOLUTELY SURE YOU DO NOT HAVE TO PAY BACK THE INSURANCE IF YOU QUIT WHILE ON LEAVE (or immediately after). A lot of companies have that policy. If you deliver and then quit, they may make you pay back the insurance company. Find out your policy.
I do plan on find out first, but how do I do that without coming right out and telling them that's my plan?
You mentioned you had a contract? And the policy on leave was vague? If you don't have the contract or access to it online, I would simply ask for a copy of the contract that the HR lady referenced. I would start there to see whether benefits have to be paid back. Also any controlling employee handbook. And check your state's labor laws because there may be something there as well.
Teachers go back next week, kids start the following week. So I'd only be working for a week or maybe two into this contract before delivering and then leaving. I'm telling my dean and the HR lady that I plan on working up until I deliver. I already signed my contract for this coming year, so they have to honor it.
Fuck bridges. I'll get letters of rec from previous employers and my coworkers.
I do feel super shitty about leaving the kids though. There are parents in my room whose kids I've taught before who made sure their kids were in my class. And now I'm going to be leaving them with god knows who. That's honestly one of the reasons I want to go back- maybe I can get it off on the right foot for the new teacher and not leave someone scrambling a week before school starts.
Go back and take full advantage of your insurance benefits.
FYI- it's pretty much the norm in education for women to do what your mom described. It doesn't screw over other teachers. If your school is anything like mine was, they probably haven't hired your sub yet, so it's not like you're going to be screwing anyone out of a job that they couldn't start 2 weeks later.
Just be ABSOLUTELY SURE YOU DO NOT HAVE TO PAY BACK THE INSURANCE IF YOU QUIT WHILE ON LEAVE (or immediately after). A lot of companies have that policy. If you deliver and then quit, they may make you pay back the insurance company. Find out your policy.
I do plan on find out first, but how do I do that without coming right out and telling them that's my plan?
I think this thing with the maternity leave would make it very easy and plausible for you to need to find out EXACTLY what the terms and expectations are. In writing. Tell them that because you are about to take maternity leave and clearly the unwritten policy is no longer the norm, that you need the details of what the current policy is, and the requirements for all related benefits including insurance.
Just be ABSOLUTELY SURE YOU DO NOT HAVE TO PAY BACK THE INSURANCE IF YOU QUIT WHILE ON LEAVE (or immediately after). A lot of companies have that policy. If you deliver and then quit, they may make you pay back the insurance company. Find out your policy.
I do plan on find out first, but how do I do that without coming right out and telling them that's my plan?
You're just covering your bases. Just because you intend on coming back doesn't mean you've signed in blood that you are. People/plans change after babies, and they know this. I did not return after mat leave- 1 year at my school and 2 years in my system. My principal harbors NO bad feelings and would hire me back if he could.