How long is your commute, including daycare drop off (if applicable)?
At what point does a commute become a deal breaker?
I work 4 days a week, 2 days the commute is 2 hours round trip, and 2.5 hours the other 2 days (with drop off/pick up). My job is otherwise fine but the time spent in the car and transit is really wearing on me. If you were in my shoes would you try to find a new job?
30 minutes to work (DH does dropoff) on a good day, 60+ on a really bad day. 45 minutes home, including pick-up.
My limit is 30 minutes regularly. I haaaaaaate traffic. I swear my next accident will be on my morning commute.
I would casually look for a job-but it depends on what other opportunities potentially exist closer to home. Job hunting can be exhausting on its own, I'd really have to be unhappy overall to start looking (but that's just me).
Usually 30 mins at the most - door to door. Having once done a LONG commute (Over an hour each way, minimum) and then eventually got down to a 25 min WALK for about 2 years - I will be very, very hard pressed to ever go above 30 mins again. My time outside of work is just too precious to me!
Yes, I would try to find a new job. I wouldn't take "just anything" based on the commute alone, but I would absolutely see if I could find a good fit that was closer to home.
Mine is 45-50 min including drop off/pick up. I wish it was shorter, I really hate it most days. I work part time though so get home between 4 and 5 and only work 3-4 days a week. If I worked full Time, no way.
I don't think I could live that many hours in the car. I'm spoiled, though, and that kind of commute would put me in another city. My commute is 20 min each way by bike, about the same by bus, or 10 min by car (but I don't have a parking spot normally, and parking is $10/day).
In your shoes, I'd either be looking for new work or moving closer to work.
Post by dancingirl21 on Aug 7, 2014 12:37:01 GMT -5
I would. We live in the Chicago suburbs and before I came to my current job, I was commuting into the city to the tune of 1.5 hours each way. Now I have a 15 minute commute and it is amazing. Not getting home to DS until significantly later would not be okay for me, since DH also goes into the city. One of us needs to be available in the burbs.
We moved closer to my work after I got pregnant. Now my commute is 10 minutes. DC is 1.5 miles from us in the opposite direction, but H will be doing drop-off most days.
I remember doing 1-2 hours commuting from work to downtown when I lived in the city. It was fine in my early 20s, but I couldn't handle it now with the baby. H does this, but he likes the down time so he can listen to the radio, podcasts, etc.
If it were me, I'd look for a new place to live (but we rent). I can definitely understand why you'd feel worn out.
I could consider other options but overall commute is only one factor. Earnings, flexibility, job satisfaction are all other things to consider. Can you WAH one day a week in your current role?
I WAH right now but overall I generally would hesitate to commute more than 2 hours a day with young children (1 hour each way) but for the right job I might consider it.
I'm at my max, and it takes me an hour each way usually. 45 minutes of driving in the morning and 15 minutes of drop-off, and it's an hour on the way home but DH does pick-up.
I recently started listening to audiobooks during my drive, and it's actually really helped my mood about the whole thing. Now it's more like "me" time since I'm getting to "read" books I've wanted to read for a while.
I would. We live in the Chicago suburbs and before I came to my current job, I was commuting into the city to the tune of 1.5 hours each way. Now I have a 15 minute commute and it is amazing. Not getting home to DS until significantly later would not be okay for me, since DH also goes into the city. One of us needs to be available in the burbs.
Same here. DH commutes to the O'Hare area, which is about an hour from us. It's one of the main reasons I took a WFH job even before I was pregnant and we were still living in the city. I knew we'd have to move out to the burbs to buy a house and once we had DD, someone had to be available to be around for her if anything happened.
I couldn't do that commute. I used to work in MD and drive to my job in DC and it was a minimum hour in and at least 1.5 home. I would have moved closer, but I was living at home and paying off SLs. I also couldn't take one of the public transportation options b/c of where I worked in DC and my hours, it sucked.
If I factor in daycare drop off and sitting with E for a few mins, my commute now is 45mins.
For the past 2 years I have had a 3 hour round trip commute on the days I did drop off/ pick up and a 2 1/2 round trip if I just did drop off. That was while I was in school. I will be student teaching this fall and will be local to daycare and home. There is no way I would do that commute again. I will not even look for a job outside of a half hour each way commute. I'm hoping to do grad school completely online to eliminate the commute entirely. Spending that much of your life in the car is exhausting. I was so bitter about the time I could be home with my family and getting the million things done that I needed to be doing instead of sitting in the car. If you have the option to work closer to home I would take it.
My commute is an hour each way and that is if all my mass transit options are running well - which they almost never are. It's too far. My place of work is moving next year and I hope it trims 15 minutes from my commute, but we'll see.
My commute is too long and stressful though and I would like to look for something closer but I'm not sure I'll find anything anytime soon.
I have a 15 minute commute each way including preschool drop off. However, I would consider a 1 hour commute each way in the right circumstances.
We spend many hours of our life at our jobs, so I think that job satisfaction is huge. I'd rather have your commute and a job I like than a short commute and a job I hate. A toxic work environment that you are subjected to 8+ hours a day is MUCH worse than a 2.5 hr commute and job you like.
I would consider up to a one hour commute each way (with a little more time with drop off and pick up), but other factors I'd consider are pay, benefits, job security, and work environment. And keep in mind that it is so, so hard to predict work environment at a new job, and that is one of the most important things to me. You could end up trading your long commute for a shorter one, and then end up with a job you hate.
I have been causally looking for jobs closer to home, I currently work downtown in the closest city and live in a suburb so jobs aren't as plentiful near home. I don't have any desire to live closer to work, it would be more expensive and we really love our neighborhood.
I was working from home one day a week, but was just told I need to be in the office all 4 days, which is contributing to my burnout.
I don't think I could live that many hours in the car.
Based on previous posts, I think some/most of it is on a bus?
I'm in a very similar situation. When work is going well, and there's no roadbump in the day, it is what it is. But if I have to leave late or traffic is extra bad or work is frustrating me, the realization I spend 160 minutes commuting is just awful. If I drove it'd probably be about 80 minutes total. But bus time is social for baby, a chance to read FB/GBCN, the evening commute traffic is just brutal, etc.
I'm looking around. The commute is definitely a factor. But I think if I liked my job more I would stick with the commute.
I would look for a new job or consider moving. I really hate long commutes.
My old commute was maybe 20 minutes in ideal circumstances, but could be 45+ minutes if I had to deal with day care drop off/pick up and it was during rush hour. That was about my limit.
I work from home now and drop off my older kids at school 10 minutes away. I also drop off the baby at CDO in my neighborhood about 5 minutes from my house 3 days a week. I spend SO much less time sitting in traffic now, and it is SO nice.
In the summer, about 45 to 50 minutes door to door. In the winter it is usually an hour, 65 minutes. That includes the time it takes me to actually drop him off at daycare, and then park my car in the parking garage and get into our building (which can take a while).
I work from home twice a week and H takes him in those days, so that helps. His daycare is also about 15 minutes from my work which adds to my commute (I have to go a different route to get there). Daycare is through my work though and is ridiculously cheap, so the commute just is what it is.
I also have a flexible schedule so I'm usually at my desk by 730 or so and then I'm leaving around 4. So i'm gone usually from 630/645 to 430/5. Before my office moved, I was home by 430 every day, sometimes earlier. it was awesome.
ETA: if I were in your shoes (since i kind of am) - meh. What are the other benefits to your job? the benefits to mine are such that I will likely never leave it, even if the commute got even worse (I'm soon going to be WAH 3 days a week, I get paid pretty well, I can work OT, I have lots of leave, and my job is really low stress). If I had to come to work 5 days a week and the job was more stressful, I'd be more inclined to leave. As it is, its going to take a lot to get me out of here. So I would look at the overall picture.
Post by pinkdutchtulips on Aug 7, 2014 13:10:42 GMT -5
when dd was born it was 60-75 mins each way including a daycare drop off AND pick up
we moved it became a monstrous 2hr+ commute each direction (including dcp dro/pick up) and finding a new position closer would have entailed a paycut even AFTER taking out the tolls and gas
dd and I moved (again!) and its down to 60-75 mins including drop/pick up
an hr long commute is normal where I live (SF/Bay Area)
depending how many openings there are for your industry ... you can always test the waters and see. I know for me, for the income level I need, I'm looking at AT LEAST an hr commute if not longer.
Post by quickstepstar on Aug 7, 2014 13:15:17 GMT -5
Well my DH does 1hr 50 min 1 way every day. Is is too long. It is hard on all of us, but he loves his job and wanted to live where we are. Around here though such a long commute is not that uncommon (NYC area).
Mine used to be 55 min 1 way. That was bearable. Anything longer than that I couldn't do. Now if I drop off all the kids it takes me 45 min, if I go straight to the office, it takes 10 min. We will have a nanny come September, and then I will not have to do drop off/pick up! It will be amazing!
In perfect weather and traffic, it takes me 35 minutes door to door. Usually it's closer to 45 minutes, sometimes an hour. We plan to move in the next 5 years - mostly for school district but also to put me closer to work.
I just moved to a job that requires a long commute (you're localish... I'm now commuting from Seattle to the northish eastside). My commute involves 2-4 freeways, depending on the route. Vanpooling has been my savior, as we can use the HOV lanes (when they exist) and I at least don't have to be actively engaged in traffic and wasting gas. That said, it can be a beast some days. Average is ~35 minutes each way, but if anything happens to snarl traffic, it quickly jumps to 50-60 minutes one way.
I know I do not want to do this long term. I thought it wouldn't be too bad, but it is already wearing on me. I am interviewing for a job with H's company that would cut my average commute to ~20 minutes on an average traffic day, reachable by one bus.
Since DS's daycare is at H's work, I do not currently deal with drop-off/pick-up.