You have been clear you want him to sleep in a crib and they should respect that. it isn't an unreasonable request at all!
As far as bottles, my center had a policy that all babies were held for bottles. It was stated in their manual and what I observed during all the time I spent there (used to nurse on my lunch hour so i was there a lot just observing). I'm not sure what is normal though.
It can definitely take some time for babies to adjust. Especially since he is older and starting to develop stranger anxiety. J started at 6 mos and it definitely took some adjusting. I also think short 30 minute naps at daycare are not unusual as babies adjust. J did this for quite a while actually.