I know spotting can be normal after having sex or being more active then normal, but is the spotting bad?
Should we abstain from sex now that we have had spotting or just go about everything like normal.
The spotting only happened the day after we last had sex and it went away within 4-5 hours after it started and was only there when I wipe.
I have told DH that I don't want to have sex anymore because my PGAL brain has been going wild since. But he feels like abstaining is just stupid. If I don't want to have sex he is ok with it but I can tell he isn't 100% happy about it.
Post by OrangeTree on Aug 13, 2014 14:44:56 GMT -5
I had spotting around 6-7 weeks & the Dr. told me to abstain for awhile. I don't think it would have hurt anything, but spotting isn't necessarily something you want to see so you should avoid triggers. However, at a later appt I was told sex was okay. We tried again and no spotting ever since the first time. I would do what your doctor recommends, but know that the irritation or whatever could go away in a few weeks, so it doesn't necessarily mean you'll be sensitive for 40weeks.
Thanx ladies, I have a doctors appointment tomorrow so I will ask her.
DH just doesn't get the whole PGAL brain thing. And I have been over reacting a little because of it and I'm no longer sure when I'm over reacting or just being cautious.
We didnt have sex until I was around 10 weeks bc I was terrified of spotting. Luckily H didnt say anything esp after we did ivf. I would abstain bc I think your cervix is just sensitive early on.
Post by luv2rn4fun on Aug 13, 2014 16:16:56 GMT -5
((hugs)) awick14. Sorry you are dealing with all of this. PGAL is hard...your DH really needs to chill and just be supportive right now. Spotting after sex is common; however, any spotting in pregnancy is a cause for concern.
FWIW, I had spotting with our second pregnancy and the doctor basically said I was allowed to do everything except have sex. His reasoning was that, although sex would not cause a miscarriage, it could lead to more spotting and cause me to be more anxious; therefore, don't do anything that would cause me to be more anxious. I wasn't happy with his recommendation (DH was totally ok with it though) but I also know that I wouldn't want to do anything that would make 1st tri any harder than it already is or have any regrets.
Hope your appt goes well tomorrow! Thinking of you!
However, your DH needs to chill on the sex thing and try to be supportive. PGAL brain is the worst.
I completely agree.
I have been so overly cautious with things this time around, so I'm having trouble figuring out if I'm being ridicules about certain things or not. This I really feel strongly about and when he gets home today we will talk about it and then I'll mention it to my doctor tomorrow.
awick14 I am sorry you are going through this. So keep us posted on what the doctor says. Too this day I still check for spotting or bleeding. Also now that I have been cleared for sex it hurts since you get all swollen down there. It's like I am virgin again. DH and I taking things slowly and we find other ways to give each other pleasure.
The reason you bleeds after sex is because the cervix is really swollen and sensitive. It's sorta the same reason why some people's noses bleed when they blow it or pick it too much. So, even once the OB clears you for sex, you could still see something afterwards and it wouldn't mean anything.
Still, I can understand you wanting to wait. Maybe ask him to put himself in your shoes? Seeing blood come from where the baby is is just really hard on some people- it's totally understandable.
Sorry you're dealing with spotting awick14. It's so hard to be PGAL even without the spotting nonsense.
When I was spotting earlier this pregnancy, my dr put me on pelvic rest for the whole first tri. I had a SCH though, so there was a specific reason. Luckily, after that cleared up and we were given the all clear, everything has been fine. I just told H that it was practice for when we have to abstain after delivery. Good luck at your dr appt tomorrow. Please keep us posted!
I don't know what happened at work today for DH but he came home apologized for being selfish about sex and he won't ask for any until I give him the all clear from the doctor. He says that he wishes that he could understand how I am feeling more as he wants to be able to share the anxiety with me.
He has felt so positive about this pregnancy. He knows that this is our take home baby so he says he just sees things differently.
I will keep you all posted about my appointment tomorrow.
I had spotting after sex at 22 weeks and we have abstained since. My dr didn't tell me that we couldn't have sex again, but I'm still too nervous. Logically I know it would probably be fine, but my PGAL brain says no way to anything that might cause spotting, even if it is harmless. My poor H... he's been very supportive and actually hasn't mentioned it or complained at all.
Post by cheeseandcrackers on Aug 13, 2014 21:45:39 GMT -5
I totally understand. If I started spotting, I would def hold back on the sex. I haven't had any this pregnancy, but even so sex makes me nervous sometimes.
We haven't had sex since the night we got the positive test. We are too freaked out. I am hoping we both loosen up after seeing the heartbeat or this will be a long nine months.
I have had spotting and/or bleeding from 9 weeks until the present and all is fine with baby. First trimester the spotting was due to a UTI infection. Second tri it was due to CPP. I know the anxiety after seeing the spotting. While this is easier said then done, try not to worry too much since it is fairly common.
Honestly, we abstained during first tri. I didn't want the mindfuck of bleeding during pregnancy. Even my RE mentioned the disclaimer about sex and bleeding and said that as long as you know that's the reason and can be comfortable with that, it's completely safe. She said if the anxiety is too much then I might want to consider abstaining.
So many T&P are with you for a perfect appointment today!! awick14
We only had sex like 3 times all of first trimester this pregnancy. I did spot a little after sex once, but only had blood when I wiped. For us it was just a PGAL brain thing. DH wanted to hold back just as much as I did.
I'm spotting again and we haven't had sex recently. I guess we will have to wait and see what my doc says tomorrow.
I don't know the last time you had sex, but my post sex spotting was 48 hours afterward. My OB said it takes some time for the blood to travel down sometimes.