I sent M to his first day of daycare today at 9:30 am with four 2oz bottles. I was planning to leave him for ~7 hours, so this *seemed* generous. I didn't have any set plans other than physical therapy at 10.
While I was waiting to check out at Sephora at 12:45, I got a call from the center that he had been sucking down milk and only had one bottle left. :-$ I didn't have any more thawed milk and didn't have set plans for the rest of the day, so I told them I'd get there as soon as I could and just take him home with me.
[Confession time: after I checked out at Sephora, I ran down to AE to get some hi-rise jeggings. LOLOL]
I raced back to the center with thoughts running through my mind like "are they going to kick us out of the center for not getting here more quickly?!" I was super apologetic when I got there, and luckily the teacher was very understanding and not upset at all. She suggested I send 4 oz. for every two hours, so I *really* need to get pumping!
I feel so stupid. Why didn't I just send more milk?? Good thing I did a dry run today and wasn't at work 45 min away!
Don't beat yourself up! It's so hard to know how much EBF babies will eat, since you have no idea how much he's eating when you're bf'ing him. I'm 100% positive that they daycare isn't upset with you at all.
And you were very smart to do a dry run--the whole point is to figure out if he's a hungry little guy, so you did exactly the right thing!
Post by Ashley&Scott on Sept 30, 2014 13:49:30 GMT -5
Hasn't he been refusing the bottle? You did the right thing, it's best to start with more bottles with fewer oz per bottle until you know how much they'll actually drink to minimize BM waste.
And 4oz every two hours is high for 2mo old. Depending on how long he's there that's 4-5 feedings (16-20oz) Average intake for a breastfed baby is 25oz per day.
Post by sunshine608 on Sept 30, 2014 13:50:55 GMT -5
Don't feel stupid. Some days DS drinks a lot and some days we have two bottles left over. Babies are funny. I learned to always send an extra bottle and then leave frozen milk just in case.
Post by countthestars on Sept 30, 2014 13:55:53 GMT -5
Not a fail! Good learning. I'm glad you were able to do some solo shopping!
In addition to trying to send more milk, I would confirm that they are doing those slower feedings (my brain is failing me, but it's to make sure BF babies don't eat too quickly??) and that they know of other soothing techniques to use and not just relying on the bottle.
Post by lurknomore on Sept 30, 2014 13:58:20 GMT -5
Is it possible too that they used the bottle to soothe him? It's common if maybe he had a rough go of it (normal...no worries) that they shoved a bottle in his mouth because they couldn't get him to calm down any other way. DH did this with DD2 when he was home with her for 2 months, otherwise it never would have occurred to me. If so, he will get used to being there and they will learn how to comfort him better so hopefully things will level off quickly to find your norm.
We had NO IDEA how much milk to send at first. After a week or so we settled on 5oz every two hours. I usually send 5 bottles but he's only ever taken 4. I keep sending. 5 bottles just in case I'm running late or he's extra hungry.
You can ask about leaving frozen milk and a clean bottle or two in their freezer for "emergencies."
Also, don't be alarmed if you can't pump enough at work to cover what he drinks at DC over the same time period. A lot of us can't. C. drinks about 20 oz but I usually only pump maybe 13-14oz while at work. I pump the rest when I wake up in the morning (I was also pumping before bed but I'm trying to cut that session out for sanity reasons).
I would consider sending a couple ready-made formula bottles for emergency backup. Sometimes their intake varies drastically when they're away from you.
This happened with DD1 too. For the week prior to going back to work I was pumping and feeding her on the schedule they said they would try (every 3-4 hours) and I thought I had sent in enough, but quickly realized that she was eating a lot more when there. I'm sure it's something that's happened before with other babies at daycare and it's good that you figured it out before you were at work.
Every baby is different. For example, I am EP. C has not gotten any formula. He is 7 weeks old. We do paced bottle feeds (he's only been fed by myself and MH so far) and he is taking 3-4 oz every 3 hours, although he sometimes gives us a longer stretch at night. He gets 28-30 ounces a day on average which his pedi said was normal. Average is 25 oz but remember every baby is different. Most Bf babies take the same amount of BM from 2 months on whereas formula fed babies increase their intake as time goes on.
It's all trial and error! You didn't do anything wrong! Did the daycare provider say if he was satisfied after eating but it didn't seem to hold him or was he still hungry after 2 oz?
We kept Frozen BM at daycare for M in case they ever needed extra. Is that an option?
DD didn't go to daycare, but my mom watches her 2 days/week while I'm at work. She was EBF via bottles with me EPing so I knew exactly how much she was drinking. She almost always drank upto 4 ounces more on the days grandma watched her than on days with me.
And DD was drinking 25 oz on average at like 4 months. By 5 and 6 months, she was drinking more like 30+ oz and outdrinking my production so we had to start supplementing.
There's a pretty slim chance you'll be able to pump 2 oz/hour you're away. Just so you know: if you choose to give them that much milk, plan to pump a lot at home or supplement formula.
I'd ask them to offer a paci and wait on offering more milk for a little while (like 20 min) after finishing a 1oz/hour bottle.
Post by aspentosh on Sept 30, 2014 14:16:15 GMT -5
That seems like a lot for a baby that young, so I am with the people saying maybe they used the bottle to soothe? Could you recommend them offering a pacifier?
But bottom line, you'll figure it all out. Kinks in plans are going to happen, even when you know what is "normal". So don't beat yourself up!
Post by electricmayhem on Sept 30, 2014 14:40:13 GMT -5
Don't beat yourself up; the exact same thing happened to me too. DS was merrily chugging along taking 2 ounces every 3 hours at home, and then decided to double that the first day I dropped him off. I felt like such a heel when they called me! We ended up picking up early that day too as I only nothing else thawed.
Wow that is a lot! DD gets maybe 10oz in a 10 hour day at the nanny's house and she is 5.5 months. It is possible yours eats a lot and that is his normal, but they might be over feeding... Either way, our first few days, we had absolutely no idea how much to send. Impossible to know how much they actually get from the breast.
You will figure it out! That is why we have test runs I left one bag of frozen breastmilk at the nanny's in case there is a day when DD is hungrier than usual.
My UO is I don't really buy the ounce an hour rule for bottle fed babies. I do think that they probably only eat that much on average at the breast but most DCPs don't have the time or inclination to worry about every ounce that is so hard for (some of us) to pump when bottle feeding. I chose to let my daughter "over eat" based on kellymom standards (12-20 ounces over 9.5 hours at daycare). It worked for us (although I started supplementing at six months).
And if you're going to feed 20 oz in 9.5 hours, that's what you need to expect.
I'm not going to say it's bad, but I am going to set up realistic expectations that pumping 16-20 oz in 8-10 hours is unlikely, and even those that manage it probably won't keep it up.
Post by schrodinger on Sept 30, 2014 15:00:54 GMT -5
DD was in daycare for ~10.5 hours. From 3-6 months she would take 12-14 oz, from 6-12 months, she was up to 15-18 oz. Definitely more than the 1oz/hour rule that gets thrown around frequently. She was more active at daycare than at home (more stimulation) and took shorter naps, so I tried not to worry about each ounce.
I nursed him at 6:45 and 8:30 am. I thought 16-20 oz while at daycare would be a lot, too, but I'm reluctant to tell them how to do their jobs. Maybe y'all are right that his consumption will level off as he becomes accustomed to daycare and less fussy? He's only 8w and his napping is erratic; I'm hoping his naptimes start to consolidate in the next few weeks.
I don't expect to pump 20 oz in a work day. Since he's only going to daycare part time through December, I think I can manage to EBF until then. I'll reevaluate supplementing in January if he's still eating this much. I don't want to make myself crazy with MOTN pumping sessions and such.
Thanks for the reassurance, ladies!
ETA: the only time he refused a bottle was once with H, and I think maybe H just didn't know what he was doing? He's been fine with my mom, MIL, and even me bottle feeding him.
I nursed him at 6:45 and 8:30 am. I thought 16-20 oz while at daycare would be a lot, too, but I'm reluctant to tell them how to do their jobs. Maybe y'all are right that his consumption will level off as he becomes accustomed to daycare and less fussy? He's only 8w and his napping is erratic; I'm hoping his naptimes start to consolidate in the next few weeks.
I don't expect to pump 20 oz in a work day. Since he's only going to daycare part time through December, I think I can manage to EBF until then. I'll reevaluate supplementing in January if he's still eating this much. I don't want to make myself crazy with MOTN pumping sessions and such.
Thanks for the reassurance, ladies!
ETA: the only time he refused a bottle was once with H, and I think maybe H just didn't know what he was doing? He's been fine with my mom, MIL, and even me bottle feeding him.
How much does he take when your mom or MIL feed him?
If they are overfeeding him it will be hard to undo later. Don't worry about "telling them how to do their jobs". It's normal for you to ask questions & advocate for him. I would just ask how often they fed him (or look at his daily sheet) Ask what his hunger cues were & if they tried any other soothing first. 6 oz in 3 hours is a lot, especially assuming he napped for at least part of that time.
4oz for every two hours sounds like a lot. I'm wondering if he maybe wants more than 2oz at a time and that's why they're running through bottles so quickly. Like if he had 3oz in a bottle maybe he'd be satisfied for longer and they'd be less likely to try and feed him again so quickly. Personally I would try 3oz bottles and send one more than you think he'll eat. See if they'll save the bottle for you if he doesn't finish it so you can see what's left (I personally reuse BM for the next feeding anyway). Also see if they have a freezer where you can keep some frozen milk.
I also had no idea how much milk to send, our first day was last Monday. I sent five 4oz bottles, he ate 4 bottles but only finished one. We've settled on four 3.5oz bottles, sometimes he only takes three but I send four regardless. I also have 12oz of frozen there if they need it.
This is a great idea, thanks. I'll send five 3oz bottles for eight hours on Thursday.
I forgot to answer PP's question: the teacher said he didn't seem satisfied by the 2 oz immediately after eating it.
I nursed him at 6:45 and 8:30 am. I thought 16-20 oz while at daycare would be a lot, too, but I'm reluctant to tell them how to do their jobs. Maybe y'all are right that his consumption will level off as he becomes accustomed to daycare and less fussy? He's only 8w and his napping is erratic; I'm hoping his naptimes start to consolidate in the next few weeks.
I don't expect to pump 20 oz in a work day. Since he's only going to daycare part time through December, I think I can manage to EBF until then. I'll reevaluate supplementing in January if he's still eating this much. I don't want to make myself crazy with MOTN pumping sessions and such.
Thanks for the reassurance, ladies!
ETA: the only time he refused a bottle was once with H, and I think maybe H just didn't know what he was doing? He's been fine with my mom, MIL, and even me bottle feeding him.
How much does he take when your mom or MIL feed him?
If they are overfeeding him it will be hard to undo later. Don't worry about "telling them how to do their jobs". It's normal for you to ask questions & advocate for him. I would just ask how often they fed him (or look at his daily sheet) Ask what his hunger cues were & if they tried any other soothing first. 6 oz in 3 hours is a lot, especially assuming he napped for at least part of that time.
They feed him 3 oz at a time, but he had only ever had one bottle at a time. (I'm not sure why I went down from 3 oz to 2...I guess because a bottle every 2 hours seemed frequent?)
Post by londoncalling on Sept 30, 2014 15:25:38 GMT -5
I'm the crazy person that sent 4 x 3oz bottles + 8 x 1oz bottles for the first few weeks. That way if she was still rooting, they could offer another ounce without heating another full bottle and possibly wasting an ounce+. I just combined the unused 1oz bottles to make my bottles for the next day and keep rotating the milk.
How much does he take when your mom or MIL feed him?
If they are overfeeding him it will be hard to undo later. Don't worry about "telling them how to do their jobs". It's normal for you to ask questions & advocate for him. I would just ask how often they fed him (or look at his daily sheet) Ask what his hunger cues were & if they tried any other soothing first. 6 oz in 3 hours is a lot, especially assuming he napped for at least part of that time.
They feed him 3 oz at a time, but he had only ever had one bottle at a time. (I'm not sure why I went down from 3 oz to 2...I guess because a bottle every 2 hours seemed frequent?)
How often does he nurse? Have you ever done a weighed feeding?
ETA: I thinking moving to 3oz bottles is fine, especially if that's what he's used to with your mom/MIL. 4oz still seems like too much to me though.
Post by narockshard on Sept 30, 2014 15:37:21 GMT -5
Wow, reading this makes me think my kid is a major pig! at 8 weeks she was getting 4 oz. every 3 hours, and we upped it to 5 oz. every 3 at 11 weeks because she was starting to not seem satisfied after 4. She's still getting that currently (14 weeks), plus I nurse her before offering the bottle (half the week and on the weekends), so I would think she's at least getting a couple oz. from me too. She does sleep 9-11 hours straight through the night now though, so maybe that has something to do with it. She's pretty average for size, just a little on the big side.
Either way, it is so frustrating trying to figure out what they need to eat! It was a really good idea to do a practice run before the real deal.
Post by booboo173 on Sept 30, 2014 15:59:22 GMT -5
Reading this also makes me feel like my kids is a pig. He has eaten 4-4oz bottles in about 10 hours consistently since he started daycare at 3 months. I did a weighed feed with an LC the week before he started and she suggested the amount.