I'm annoyed with my dad

[joenali]

He never calls me. I always have to call him. I just wish he would call every so often. He's never really been a phone guy, and I'm not asking for a daily call, just a call to say Hi!

I think the last time we talked, I called him and that was about a month ago.

I'm kind of being passive aggressive and not calling him until he calls me. But I miss my dad! :-( :-(

And I do ask "why don't you call me?" And he really doesn't ahve much to say.

[hulley]

I'm sorry. My dad is like this, too. When he's not working he'll call, but the rest of the year it's "I'm busy, honey". Um, ok, thanks? I'm just looking for a quick 10 second "Hi, how are you?".

Sorry you're missing your dad ((joenali))

[sjh722]

Sorry. My Dad is also not a caller, usually just if he's on the road on the way to the airport, a conference, etc.. I saw him for lunch with my family a few weeks ago, but we can easily go months without talking on the phone. I talk to my mom almost daily. (And yes, they're still married.)

[Deleted]

Aug 2, 2012 13:12:25 GMT -5 @songforyou said:

So...how long are you going to sit around missing him before *truly* accepting that he's not a phone person and just calling him?

yep.

I can't remember the last time I called anyone just to chat. I hate the phone. I hope I have no loved ones sitting by their phones waiting for me--they would be waiting a long time. lol

if talking on the phone is important to you, call him.

[Deleted]

I'm sorry.

I'm there with you, but it's on visiting. My dad calls, but he refuses to visit. I haven't seen him in two years and no idea that when I'll see him next.

[ssmjlm]

I've never been a phone talker. Usually i call my dad b/c I need advice or I get him when I call for my mom. We email a lot, poor guy is stuck babysitting his parents right now, definitely not calling b/c my grandparents are BSC.

They visit monthly though.

[aurora]

I also think it's partly generational. Even though my parents have cell phones now, they grew up in a time when it was pretty expensive to call long distance, so they think of it as something you do when you have something to say, not just to say hi.

Also, my parents and grandparents always assume(d) that I was busier than them so if they let me call it would work better into my schedule, and they're probably right.

[mrssandro]

Me and my dad both hate the phone. We email all the time though. It's the only way I communicate with him.

[Deleted]

Aug 2, 2012 14:06:30 GMT -5 @fivedogs said:

Aug 2, 2012 13:12:25 GMT -5 @songforyou said:

So...how long are you going to sit around missing him before *truly* accepting that he's not a phone person and just calling him?

This. I could maybe understand it if this was someone you were dating and you have different ideas about how often to call, but it's kind of odd to hold family members to a standard like this if they are just not phone people.

I get this attitude if the other person visits, sends letters, emails, etc., and just isn't into the phone. But when phone is the main form of communcation - as it is for many families who are separated by distance - why should the onus always be on one person to make the calls?

People always say that marriage is work and requires good communication, but that's not uniqe to marriage. It applies to all relationships. I think if you want to have a relationship with someone, you make at least some effort to keep in touch. But maybe that's just me.

[Willis Jackson]

I don't call anyone. Ever.

Is he an email person?

[rubytue]

H's parents never call except when they need an answer to a question (usually a home repair q). They feel that it's the kids job to call the parents, not vise versa. Although the excuse they have given before is "we know you all are busy so we figure you'll call when you have time."

Either call or don't call, but try not to get upset over the way he is.

[womet]

Aug 2, 2012 13:05:49 GMT -5 joenali said:

He never calls me. I always have to call him. I just wish he would call every so often. He's never really been a phone guy, and I'm not asking for a daily call, just a call to say Hi!

I didn't realize that we have the same dad. My dad will not call me... ever. My sister and I have struggled with this for years. I have just resigned myself to the fact that I will always have to be the one initiating phone calls. That's just how he is. My sister doesn't have as good of a relationship with him, so she doesn't call. And he doesn't call her. So their relationship continues to be strained.

[mrs.spunky]

If I call looking for my dad, he doesn't even answer the phone.

He doesn't email. He doesn't have a cell phone so no texting.

I relay maybe 80% of my messages for him through my mom and vice versa.

[kate1482]

My dad never calls eaither. I set up iMessage on his iPad and now I get random texts from him. (which i love!) he will also send the occasional email. He's just not a phone guy.

[vanillacourage]

My dad is like that too (and we used to be close). I got pissed enough to vow that he would have to be the next to call me - hence why he found out that I was pregnant with DS2 when I was six months along. And only then because I called HIM because it was Christmas and I felt bad.

Hmph. Today is his birthday so I guess I will call him. I can't imagine being like this with my kids.

[macmars45]

9/10 I call and talk to my mom. She's a better phone talker. I see both of my parents about once a month though.

[dapotato]

my dad is dead. so is my stepdad, who was like a dad to me. call him.

[Deleted]

Aug 2, 2012 13:05:49 GMT -5 joenali said:

I'm kind of being passive aggressive and not calling him until he calls me. But I miss my dad!

If you really miss your father, you should call him.

There are many people on this board whose fathers are not even alive.

Do it while you can.

[pantsparty]

Some people don't like talking on the phone. Including me.

[starlily]

I miss my dad every day. I wish I had the option to call him.

Put your pride aside & take advantage of the opportunity you have. You never knew when that might be taken away from you.

[mokes]

My dad would never call me to talk. He's just not that person. It doesn't bother me though ... it has nothing to do with me or how much he cares about me.