Bedtime struggles with infants

[vtdiamond]

The last week has been rough getting the babies to go down for a night.  During the day they are on a nice little schedule of waking, diaper change, eat then sleep.  However at night all hell brakes loose.  Babies eat mostly formula (Enfamil) with a few bottles of pumped BM through out the day. We keep them swaddled for bed and try to swaddle them as tight as possible.  They sleep in their RNPs day and night. 

DS has started screaming and crying like he is in pain and is pretty much unconsolable. All along he has seemed to have gas issues so we constantly are burping him.  During the day as long as he burps he's pretty good and naps well.  However, at night even with burps and farts he just wails like he is in pain.  We will try giving him a bottle which will soothe him temporarily but then he'll start crying with that.  We've tried gas drops, bicycle legs, pacifiers and tummy rubs but nothing seems to be working.  Eventually he will just cry himself to sleep.   I'm wondering if we need to switch formula or if there are other things I should try first. 

DD also has issue falling asleep.  In general she is super alert and constantly looking around.  It seems like she is just overstimultated so we try giving her a bottle and rocking with white noise in the dark in the nursery.  However it will take forever, every time she nods off she will wake back up again soon after.  

Last night it took almost 5 hours to get them both to sleep.  Pedi has said the gas and fussiness are all normal. I'd love any suggestions or advice please.

[Deleted]

I'd probably talk to your doc about reflux if he seems to be having pain that eating soothes.

You are at the worst part for a lot of people - the newborn sleepiness is done, and the 6 week crankies are just around the corner. Try to get some daylight early in the morning, and hit the 5 s's hard for bed time.

[vaportrail]

Dec 9, 2014 11:03:59 GMT -5 @tokenhoser said:

I'd probably talk to your doc about reflux if he seems to be having pain that eating soothes.

You are at the worst part for a lot of people - the newborn sleepiness is done, and the 6 week crankies are just around the corner. Try to get some daylight early in the morning, and hit the 5 s's hard for bed time.

YES.  If I "shhh" in a steady rhythm while patting his butt, he zonks right now. Took me a long time to learn that though.

Also I think their digestive systems are maturing some between 5-8 weeks so the gas is OOC.  I alternated gas drops and gripe water and that sort of kept it under control.

[vtdiamond]

Dec 9, 2014 11:03:59 GMT -5 @tokenhoser said:

I'd probably talk to your doc about reflux if he seems to be having pain that eating soothes.

You are at the worst part for a lot of people - the newborn sleepiness is done, and the 6 week crankies are just around the corner. Try to get some daylight early in the morning, and hit the 5 s's hard for bed time.

Thanks. 

I was wondering about reflux as well but he doesn't spit up too much and I had thought that was one of the main symptoms of reflux.  He threw up/spit up a bunch 2 nights ago but other then that he doesn't spit up very much.

5 S's seem some what effective with her so we keep trying those. 

[vtdiamond]

Dec 9, 2014 11:09:00 GMT -5 vaportrail said:

Dec 9, 2014 11:03:59 GMT -5 @tokenhoser said:

I'd probably talk to your doc about reflux if he seems to be having pain that eating soothes.

You are at the worst part for a lot of people - the newborn sleepiness is done, and the 6 week crankies are just around the corner. Try to get some daylight early in the morning, and hit the 5 s's hard for bed time.

YES.  If I "shhh" in a steady rhythm while patting his butt, he zonks right now. Took me a long time to learn that though.

Also I think their digestive systems are maturing some between 5-8 weeks so the gas is OOC.  I alternated gas drops and gripe water and that sort of kept it under control.

Thanks, I have only tried the gas drops so far but was planning to get some gripe water today. 

[Deleted]

I have no personal experience with reflux, but I know people here talk about "silent reflux" a lot. I think most babies have some degree of reflux, but if you think your baby is in pain that's when it's worth pursuing at least a chat with the doctor.

Keep trying things to see what they prefer. Swing? Vibration?

[pinotgrig]

You're in survival mode right now, but it gets better. Lots of hugs to you.

Have you tried putting him in a swing? White noise? Will he take a pacifier?

I would encourage you to read this -
www.troublesometots.com/newborn-baby-sleep-survival-guide/

[linz]

I'm right there with you! I dont go to sleep till 2/3 am most nights. Its hell and from what I've read is common. I'm hoping it ends soon.

[linz]

Also the only way I get DS to calm is hold him on his side and keep the paci in his mouth. He usually stays awake between feedings until the late one and then crashes. Luckily DD isnt going thru this. The swing does nothing for us and he doesnt spit up either but does have gas.

[daisycat]

Might be worth looking into possible reflux. My little one didn't spit up either, his was silent. I could see him sometimes spitting up, but it not coming all the way up/out. He also was soothed by eating constantly, which was what ultimately one of the signs that convinced the dr. he had it.

You might also want to check into probiotic drops. That might help mature his digestive system a little faster.

Do you have a rock n play? My little one loved sleeping in that for a while and it kept him upright a little which helped with the reflux.

[Deleted]

I'd look into reflux. It is possible to have "silent" reflux where they don't actually spit up but are still in pain etc. You may different formula but I have never formula fed so I can't speak to that aspect. I would speak with the pedi first.

I'd keep doing the 5 s. Make sure the white noise or shooshing is loud! Some days I would just run the vacuum with the girls in the rock n plays downstairs and that would calm them. I also sometimes would turn them on their side in the rock n play. Not at night obviously, but during the day when I was watching them. The side cam be very effective.

Hang in there! As my H said a few weeks ago, life is only as easy as your most difficult twin.

[vtdiamond]

Dec 9, 2014 11:13:26 GMT -5 pinotgrig said:

You're in survival mode right now, but it gets better. Lots of hugs to you.

Have you tried putting him in a swing? White noise? Will he take a pacifier?

I would encourage you to read this -
www.troublesometots.com/newborn-baby-sleep-survival-guide/

Thanks, I'll give it a read.

Yes, we have tried the swing, paci and white noise. 

[Deleted]

I have no good advice, but wanted to offer a hug! You're doing a great job. Babies are hard. It gets better! Hang in there!

[vtdiamond]

Dec 9, 2014 11:20:02 GMT -5 cab1217 said:

I'm sorry. I'm in the same boat as you are, and you have 2! Hang in there. I haven't slept in 27 hours and nothing is working on my end either. I am drinking strongggggg coffee this morning.

(hugs) sorry you're here too, uggh.  I'm on cup #3 of coffee!  It has to get better from here is what I keep telling myself. 

[scribellesam]

I hate "sshh"-ing for long periods of time, I get light headed and irritated. DH and I use a free white noise app on our phone and put the speaker right up near his ear. Instant calm for our guy and we get to breathe normally.

[Odonata]

My DD also was this way and I assume she had silent reflux as she calmed down a bit after being on medication. However, she was still very hard to calm at night. Between the hours of 4/5 to around 9 she would cry (use to be screaming before the reflux meds) and there was nothing we could do to calm her. She also didn't respond to swaddling or the 5s method. Swings, noise machines, and other tricks helped little.

I eventually found a way to hold and rock her that she responded to that worked for me so keep trying different things, though I bet that would be hard with two!

After time, though, her night time fussiness did calm down to only a few times a week so some nights are great and she goes down w/o fuss. So, like others had said to me at that time, it does actually get better.

[aqualuv]

Around the 6 - 7 week mark, L had painful gas throughout the day. Our pedi suggested Gerber Soothe drops and they worked wonders for us. He hasn't had the drops in two weeks now because he no longer needs them. The Colic Calm did nothing for us.

ETA: Good luck, I'm sure it will get better soon. Hang in there!

[BaliHai]

DD had silent reflux, and she went through a screamy period for a while around this age. It ended up being that she needed an earlier bedtime - we had previously been putting her down for the night around 9/10, but we adjusted her routine to get her down by 6, and it worked like a charm. She actually went to sleep between 6-6:30 from 6 weeks until a couple of weeks ago, when we pushed her back to 7-7:30.

[vtdiamond]

Dec 9, 2014 11:26:44 GMT -5 linz said:

Also the only way I get DS to calm is hold him on his side and keep the paci in his mouth. He usually stays awake between feedings until the late one and then crashes. Luckily DD isnt going thru this. The swing does nothing for us and he doesnt spit up either but does have gas.

Sorry you're here too  The side hold and paci has worked some when DH was holding him last night so we'll keep trying that.  I wouldn't mind as much him staying awake during feedings, but he's crying the whole time like he's in pain which breaks my heart.

[vtdiamond]

Dec 9, 2014 12:17:50 GMT -5 aqualuv said:

Around the 6 - 7 week mark, L had painful gas throughout the day. Our pedi suggested Gerber Soothe drops and they worked wonders for us. He hasn't had the drops in two weeks now because he no longer needs them. The Colic Calm did nothing for us.

ETA: Good luck, I'm sure it will get better soon. Hang in there!

We have this as well, guess it's worth a try too. Thanks!

[ngdgtco]

Not sure how old they are, but we had hours-long screamfests at bedtime from about 4-7 weeks, and then things improved dramatically. We created more of a routine at that point and started putting him down earlier, but I really think the biggest aspect of it was time. Hang in there!

[cinnamoncox]

I forget how old they are, but they're very young right? 1-2months?

My twins cried from like 5-8 pm from around 6 weeks to maybe 9 weeks, I forget exactly. Nothing was wrong, just the witching hour but times two.
We did the drops, 5 S's and just waited it out.

Have you watched happiest baby on the block? Ten min of watching that was more helpful than literally anything else baby related. Honestly it was a life saver.
In the beginning we were al, omg must stop the crying the babies are suffering, but I don't think they were, it was just the normal witching hour but bc there were two babies and two of us, we were both constantly soothing (or trying to anyway) someone so it felt worse since no one got a break.
Eventually after watching that video and just realizing we were doing everything we could, we would just hold them and wait until later on when they'd just stop.

One of them had a harder time over night than the other for about two to three weeks. I don't know why.
They slept in rock and play sleepers next to our bed for the first five or so months, then in pack and plays in our room until about 11-12 months then in their cribs in their room. They were up every two hours to eat.

If you haven't seen that video watch it, really it's life changing with babies. Good luck. Twins are hard but so wonderful when this is over. Hang in there.

[daisy24342]

Thank you for writing this.....I feel as though we are in the same place, DD is a little over 6 weeks.....way fussy and lots of gas pain! Even during day. I have no additional advice, just hugs.

[daisy24342]

Dec 9, 2014 12:13:17 GMT -5 Odonata said:

My DD also was this way and I assume she had silent reflux as she calmed down a bit after being on medication. However, she was still very hard to calm at night. Between the hours of 4/5 to around 9 she would cry (use to be screaming before the reflux meds) and there was nothing we could do to calm her. She also didn't respond to swaddling or the 5s method. Swings, noise machines, and other tricks helped little.

I eventually found a way to hold and rock her that she responded to that worked for me so keep trying different things, though I bet that would be hard with two!

After time, though, her night time fussiness did calm down to only a few times a week so some nights are great and she goes down w/o fuss. So, like others had said to me at that time, it does actually get better.

Not to thread jack, but what meds did your Lo get for reflux? How long did she need them?  I am planning on taking my daughter to dr for some symptoms and I know nothing about it.  

[vtdiamond]

Dec 9, 2014 13:51:14 GMT -5 daisy24342 said:

Dec 9, 2014 12:13:17 GMT -5 Odonata said:

My DD also was this way and I assume she had silent reflux as she calmed down a bit after being on medication. However, she was still very hard to calm at night. Between the hours of 4/5 to around 9 she would cry (use to be screaming before the reflux meds) and there was nothing we could do to calm her. She also didn't respond to swaddling or the 5s method. Swings, noise machines, and other tricks helped little.

I eventually found a way to hold and rock her that she responded to that worked for me so keep trying different things, though I bet that would be hard with two!

After time, though, her night time fussiness did calm down to only a few times a week so some nights are great and she goes down w/o fuss. So, like others had said to me at that time, it does actually get better.

Not to thread jack, but what meds did your Lo get for reflux? How long did she need them?  I am planning on taking my daughter to dr for some symptoms and I know nothing about it.  

I was wondering the same thing.  If it is reflux how much can they do, is it just baby zantac or something?

[teatimefor2]

Hugs, my son is six weeks and I hear your pain.

We swaddle, dark room, gas drops and often bouncing him with his swaddled body against my chest with his head skin to skin seems to help. He still calms with the skin to skin.

It will get easier, the three month mark is a huge difference.

[Odonata]

daisy24342
vtdiamond

Yes, "baby zantac" or Ranitidine. She takes 0.6 ml morning and night since the beginning of November. She went from a very fussy spit-upper to a "happy" spit-upper, meaning she didn't scream when spitting up or during/after eating.

However, she remained fussy and difficult at night, but I did notice that one "layer" of fussiness to be gone...it that makes any sense.

As far as how long, she has been on it for a month and at her last appointment the doctor said she will "grow out" of the medication, as in as she gains weight the dosage will eventually become ineffective and if we notice symptoms returning then we will revisit to see if we need to increase the dose for her current body weight.

I have to say that the first Dr. we were seeing in the practice takes more of a holistic approach and his idea was "all babies have reflux and will grow out of it, just deal with the crying.". He suggested I put her in a car seat and let her cry it out when she became inconsolable - at six weeks! We saw another Dr. in that practice and as soon as I started to describe the symptoms she said "Sure, sounds like acid reflux, we'll start her on meds and see how it works". Just something to think about if you get a Dr. who blows you off like my first one did.

[linz]

Dec 9, 2014 12:17:50 GMT -5 aqualuv said:

Around the 6 - 7 week mark, L had painful gas throughout the day. Our pedi suggested Gerber Soothe drops and they worked wonders for us. He hasn't had the drops in two weeks now because he no longer needs them. The Colic Calm did nothing for us.

ETA: Good luck, I'm sure it will get better soon. Hang in there!

I just bought these tonight and hope they work soon!

[aqualuv]

Dec 9, 2014 19:10:29 GMT -5 linz said:

Dec 9, 2014 12:17:50 GMT -5 aqualuv said:

Around the 6 - 7 week mark, L had painful gas throughout the day. Our pedi suggested Gerber Soothe drops and they worked wonders for us. He hasn't had the drops in two weeks now because he no longer needs them. The Colic Calm did nothing for us.

ETA: Good luck, I'm sure it will get better soon. Hang in there!

I just bought these tonight and hope they work soon!

We noticed a difference within a day. I hope it works for your LO's.

[linz]

Dec 9, 2014 19:34:21 GMT -5 aqualuv said:

Dec 9, 2014 19:10:29 GMT -5 linz said:

I just bought these tonight and hope they work soon!

We noticed a difference within a day. I hope it works for your LO's.

Ds just had a huge spit up after I added this to bottle. He rarely spits up so hopefully his body absorbed some!