So, um. I need help w/ my kid

[DotAndBuzz]

She asked me today if I knew what the N word was.

RECORD SCRATCH

I try to play it cool, like "the what?  Hmmmm, let me think.... What word are YOU thinking about?"  Throw it back on her, right?  She said there were other kids talking about "the N word" in school, but they weren't saying it, and she wanted to know what it was.  She didn't seem to have any context clue, but she knows that whatever it is, it's bad. I don't think she has any clue about racism or our nation's history in that regard.  Her school is very diverse, but I don't think they've addressed a lot/any of that history yet (1st grade this year).

Of course, now they're off for winter break, so I feel like an email to the teacher today wouldn't be the best timing.  I'll send her one closer to the start of school in a couple weeks, I think, to give her the heads up that kids were talking about this, but yeah.  I'm kind of lost here.  She thinks the "S word" is Stupid, and we don't even say the word "hate."  We don't swear in our house around the kids, and we sure as hell don't say that word, like, ever. 

I was thinking I'd bring it up to her tomorrow, and say that I think I may have figured out the word she was talking about, but that we never ever say it, because it is hateful, horrible, and hurtful to people, some of whom are her friends.  And that if she hears kids say it, she needs to tell the teacher right away.

Someone please tell me if this is the right thing to do, or what else I should do/say.  I'm truly at a loss here. 

[Deleted]

Did she say " the n word" or did she say the actual word?

[DotAndBuzz]

She said "the N word." Not the actual word. And since she doesn't know any *actual* bad words, I'm sort of hoping that they're talking about something completely benign/not on the same level of awful. like "nuts" or something.

That's what's making me hesitate.

[rosiedozie]

How about something honest, but high level?

"Sometimes people mistreat other people just because of the way that they look. That's a word that is used to be mean and isn't a nice word. We should be nice to everyone even if they look different" etc.