He's lucky too since she's adorable and procreates well.
I'm sad I didn't see grandson as long as we'd hoped (his birthday was the 17th and we were going to celebrate on the 16th when he got here but had to do a quickie the morning of the 17th before we headed out to see Santa and pass him off to his dad instead) and yes, they're out $10K they hoped to not be out if they were able to get on the Patriot. They paid each way separately, hoping to save the money in at least one direction of travel. There's no mad in any of us because it is what it is. Stressed at the time, very not happy to see the money go and sad to see her and the kids leave earlier than we'd hoped. But not out spitting nails pissed or anything like that.
They're all on the plane (left at 4:00 p.m. yesterday afternoon instead of 4:00 a.m. today) and should be approaching their base any time now, after thirty-two hours flight time including a nine-hour layover in Tokyo (that's the part we're really not happy about, how long they have to be in the planes now and how many layovers/length of layovers rather than the ten-hour straight shot a Patriot would have given them...they're in transit a complete day longer on commuters). DD was hoping to escape the terminal long enough to hit a few rides at Tokyo Disney since they couldn't get on the earlier flight. lol.
I'm not sure why the confusion. We're not outraged or anything else, nor did I ever state that he is entitled to the free or discounted airfare or direct routes or shorter travel times or transporter beams because he's military. I'm not sitting here cursing or feeling short-changed. Rather, I've been sitting here going "Ugh, they're making three stops and traveling with a baby. This will be hell." and checking statuses far longer than we'd hoped. Never did I say I was upset, beyond the fact that they're out time and money we'd all *hoped* they wouldn't be out because this *option* was available. They're traveling with a baby, out $10K and spending 24 extra hours in transit, with multiple stops and a baby, a tired and whiny 9 year old and all the accoutrements (man, I love that word!) said baby and exhausted-and-no-doubt-whiny 9-year-old require.
I can't think of anyone would be dancing at the thought of spending money and an extra 24 hours in airplanes and airports if they had the chance at free and non-stop, especially with a baby. I've not once said they SHOULD be on that plane (or be given a direct flight or free/reduced fares or shot from cannons or whatever). FREE and DIRECT (10 hours) vs. $10K and 32 hours/2 connections/have-to-leave-before-roll-call-so-we-can't-even-see-if-we-have-seats-for-the-free-nonstop-flight-and-there's-a-9-hour-layover-in-Tokyo-because-that's-how-it-works-out-to-make-it-back-in-time-dammit-this-sucks-and-BABY-traveling-with-BAYBEE-Ohmigod-this-will-be-hell. We HOPED they would be on that plane. We didn't EXPECT it. It doesn't mean I can't feel bad (and hope others might empathize) when their time is cut short, I have less time to visit with the grandkids (and them, of course), and they're out shitloads of money because a hoped-for outcome doesn't eventuate.
They had to wait until the 26th to find out how many seats would even be available. Nobody was at the desk when they were at the airport on the morning of the 26th (coming back from his mom's) nor were they answering the phone at the desk until a bit later in the day (too much rum punch the night before - lol). As soon as they found out how short the seat list was, they were online purchasing tickets. And all the ticketing options were for before roll call so there was no option of purchasing refundable tickets and waiting for roll call to see if they could make it for FREE and NONSTOP. To be clear, there wasn't an expectation that they would make the flight but we were all hoping hard for the best-case-scenario. The only flights available that would have them back at base in time all left before roll call. They signed for roll call the minute they could, hoping for an early spot on the list, and wanted to wait it out to see if they were early enough. Staying for roll-call to see if they got their seats meant he would be three hours late to his desk. Three hours. Those three hours were killing DD when she wanted to try for roll call or a later flight or shorter layovers. One extra day (with 60 days accrued he has the time, but with the season they didn't give him the option) would have given them so much more leeway with better flights and at least allowed them the option of staying for roll call to see if there were seats available. But that's not how it works. It doesn't mean I can't feel bad for them though.
To further clarify, the only part his chosen profession has to do with it is they had the OPTION to travel for 10 hours on a non-stop flight free of charge instead of 24-32 hours each direction with multiple layovers at a cost of $10K. They were hoping against hope to get a free flight at least one direction but it didn't happen. So they've been warming seats in multiple planes for an entire extra day. IMO (or as GD2 would say "in my world") it's normal to feel bad that they spent five figures and 24 hours when they hoped against hope for free and direct, in at least one direction to save time and money. Ergo, "My poor DD and her family." Never did I say, nor even imply (I hope), that they should get special treatment or that because he's military (and a pilot, so yes, he knows how planes and flight times work. It's DD that was getting upset at the time and money being expended) that somehow they should get special express flights or free tickets or miraculously appear at airports faster or more magically than a "normal" person.
And to further, further clarify. We knew the risks going in. Doesn't mean it doesn't suck that it didn't work out. And that they're out money and we're all out valuable time.
Maybe I should have posted on MM. I'm sure they would have winced, at the very least, at the thought of all that pretty money going bye-bye.
That sucks for them and I get why you are sad/upset for them. I am glad they made it home safe and that you got to spend a little time with them.
And given the piddly stuff that people bitch on here about all the time, I am a little surprised at the "outrage" people are having at your having less than happy feelings about the situation.
I understand the frustration. I wouldn't travel patriot express for that reason- I HATE not knowing when/if I'm flying.
We military-connected people hear A LOT of complaints from people who think they are owed or entitled to something because they are military. We (the good ones who understand that you aren't owed a damned thing) get our fur up when we even smell the littlest bit of entitlement, which, your op did smack of. Even if you didn't mean it to, maybe we are just a bit sensitive to it.
I'm glad their home though! I'm sure they are very glad to be out of the airport!
They wanted to try for it because it was So.Much.Better than the alternative of being on a plane/in terminals for full days longer and at a much higher cost. The direct flight was so darn tempting. Like a siren call. Free isn't bad either.
Maybe I should hang out on the Military boards more, so the AD and current dependents might know me a bit better. Know the history and adjust expectations and all that. It's been so long since I've been a dependent (20 years) that I don't.
My/our/their resume:
XH was military (USN, 5 years as his spouse while AD, two weddings and zero honeymoons, and he didn't meet DD1 until she was 6 months old) and then disabled while we were married (so another multiple of years dealing with VA and other various entities). I volunteer and support the NWUSO (as a matter of fact, I used the trip to the airport as an excuse to drop off another 180 lbs. of candy and Christmas cards. A good friend was secretary of the Ohio AmVets back in the day and I support them on her behalf as well. I lived in a tent for three months, with a disabled husband and three small kids while pregnant with our youngest (who came home to said tent and didn't have a bedroom in a house until he was six weeks old), because former military isn't entitled to crap until a rating is granted, when we lost our "entitlement" of housing and VA wouldn't come through with a proper disability rating for another three years. I'm the last person to think military are "owed" anything (except maybe a heck of a lot more respect and consideration than they are given at times, especially the veterans and disabled, and most especially those with PTSD, head trauma and other not easily diagnosable conditions that are underrated and underserved.)
DD1 (and the other three kids) were raised by a disabled vet with multiple issues and complications and have had to deal with government/military entities and intrusions from early childhood until they reached the age of majority. As the oldest, DD1 was most familiar with the issues and expectations.
FIL (XH's step-dad) was career Navy. Retired commander. Floated for several days in the ocean when his ship was sunk during WWII and listened to his friends drown or get eaten by sharks and he had nightmares and slept with a night light on for the next 50 years because of it. He retired at 20 and joined the Coast Guard/NOAA for another 21 before he joined a civilian ship line because he couldn't stand being landlocked for too long. Dad was Navy, fortunately between Korea and Vietnam. Son-in-law's mom was a high-ranking Air Force officer with 20 or so years at the Pentagon before she retired after 30, with a higher ranking than SIL's step-dad who retired at 20 and now teaches at the Air Force Academy. His bio-dad also retired after 20 before going civilian and working for Boeing. SIL himself is a graduate of the Naval Academy, with a short stint as an exchange cadet at the Air Force Academy as well.
Hope is still golden but expectations are generally low. (We're a military family, after all. To the point that XH tried to re-up when Desert Shield happened in '90-91 but he wasn't seizure free and was therefore denied. And I had tried to enlist when he was first disabled - because benefits - but "too many kids" made it a no-go. Even with ASVAB scores that were truly amazing. As in "you can do anything except nuke, because you have breasts and a uterus and that's the only reason. They would love to make you glow in the dark with these scores.")
I didn't think the OP smacked of entitlement so much as disappointment and upset that it didn't work out so they're going to have calloused rears and hemorrhoids and exhausted babies. I'm not shocked it didn't happen (none of us were actually *shocked* so I was surprised to see that people were reading shock, outrage and entitlement into it) but it's still disappointing when we're a silver-lining kind of family and were hoping against hope that it would work out for the best, at least once, with fingers crossed hard.