Have You Ever Been Physically Abused?

[Pom]

I'll go...it's been a long time. I met a man and dated him for a couple of weeks. I went away for a month and when I returned, he started trying to isolate me from everyone. One night he grabbed me and knocked me to the floor. This happened once. My very large, scary friends came over and "evicted" him from my home. He continued to stalk me for about 3 months, broke into my house twice, once hiding under my bed with a knife. He eventually got tired of me having him arrested for violating the PPO I filed.

[mrs.spunky]

I said no to this poll (yes to the other one) but I am re-thinking my answer.

My next-door neighbor tried to drown me in his pool when I was 7/8.
He hit me, but never left any marks/bruises, and touched me inappropriately.

He was 10 at the time.

I never told anyone, including my parents, until after DH and I were married.

[bliss]

Yes. I've been thrown across hotel rooms, choked against a wall, dragged by my hair, jewelry ripped off my neck, and more. I put myself in really terrible relationships for a long time. I spent a good 3 years repeatedly dating men who treated me like shit. I wasn't completely innocent either. I always hit back, which didn't always work in my favor.

It's taken me a long time to pull myself away from those type of relationships. It was a vicious cycle. One that not many people know about and one that I never want to be in again.

[mrs.spunky]

Aug 6, 2012 11:48:17 GMT -5 operagirl said:

Spunky: 10 years old, wonder what he grew up to be like.

Not a nice person!
He moved away that year but not too far. A good friend of mine (a guy I met through DH when I was ~23) went to HS with him, and I found out his sister was his best friend in HS. His parents still own a business in my parents' town, which is where he works. My dad has gone there a few times despite my mom asking him not to patronize them.

That said, I basically swore my mom and DH to secrecy. My dad would literally kill him if he had the chance, and I don't want my 67 yo father to spend the rest of his life in prison over scum. My DH would likely do the same, but he doesn't know what the guy looks like, where he lives, etc.

[explorer2001]

I'll leave the cliff notes version here. If anyone wants to PM me that's fine. Once I post I'm burying myself in work so I'll be away for a bit.

Here's the short list: bullied and beaten up more times than I can count, held at knife point by my brother's friend while he did nothing, assaulted by an uncle, raped in HS, raped and beaten until I miscarried by an exBF, exH did more than I care to.recount here ultimately attempting to kill me.

I've been in therapy for some time. I have somehow managed to overcome everything. I have a great life, successful career, etc. Now I volunteer with a domestic violence shelter to help others and make good come from all the evil that has happened in my life. If nothing else I give them hope that you can go on and have a good life.

[aspentosh]

My life is far from perfect but I was lucky enough to not endure any abuse.

((hugs)) to all you very strong, very brave ladies.

[wannabe]

yes. by the ex, who is still probably in denial about it. the worst was when he got pissed off, grabbed me by the neck and swung me around in a circle. i remember times when i would hide under a desk to keep from being seen. why it took me so long to leave, i just don't know. and when i did tell him i was leaving him, he grabbed a shotgun and threatened suicide with me watching him and our daughter in the next room.

this is why i'm so grateful for the life i have now.

[iamali]

Sadly yes. I was physically abused by my bio. father as a child. He slapped me so hard across the face one time that he dislodged filling in one of my teeth. A beating with the belt was a regular occurrence. I used to go to school with bruises and, to my knowledge, not a single teacher ever questioned it (I'm not blaming them in the least, it's more a WTF?).

[Deleted]

My much older brother tortured & abused me almost my entire childhood in pretty much every way. I had another older brother who also participated but he mostly just went along & did not instigate. The best day of my life was when I was 15 & he finally left the house.

[LauraMoser]

My parents spanked me, but I would never consider it abuse. It was punishment and I knew and understood it.

I was hit once by my HS BF, but that pales in comparison to what you ladies have endured. He was a pretty big asshole, and looking back now, I do believe he had been a little emotionally abusive as well.

Your stories make me want to cry for you all. That you are here and can tell your story says a lot about the strong people you are.

[bliss]

Oh I suppose my bio dad beat me pretty much every other weekend with a belt for one reason or another. A few times it was with a tree branch. My step dad gave me a black eye once. Although, he doesn't remember it that way and it's "my fault."

[Deleted]

Aug 6, 2012 12:33:27 GMT -5 bliss said:

Oh I suppose my bio dad beat me pretty much every other weekend with a belt for one reason or another. A few times it was with a tree branch. My step dad gave me a black eye once. Although, he doesn't remember it that way and it's "my fault."

My answer is yes. I'm not going into details though. Emotional and physical.

[sporky]

yes, but the physical abuse in our house was mostly directed at my sister. i hit my major growth spurt early so i truly believe that my mother was simply too afraid to really hit me after a certain point. however, there were still years of being beaten with belts, threatened with butcher knives, being pushed down stairs, etc. my sister was hit until she left home at 18.

[ondaflipside]

Holy sh*t, ladies. I'm so sorry. I got ass-beating that I deserved when I was growing up, but nothing compared to these.

My EXH broke a glass table and punched a closet door when I threatened to leave him, but that was pretty mild. It was embarassing to show our TH to RE agents thereafter.

[rex]

By my father & step-mother.

[NinaSimone]

Yes, by an ex-boyfriend. I have been choked up against walls, my arm slammed in a car door, a hot iron thrown at me, my head rammed into a wall (it left a dent) and my keys ripped out of my grasp, causing the key ring to slice through my middle finger. The worst day was when I told him I was pregnant. He wasn't ready for a baby so he threw me across the room and I landed on the metal bedpost then hit the floor. While I was down he stomped on my stomach and yelled at me.

[wannabe]

yes. she is with him every other week, Friday to Friday. that's how it's been since she was 4, and luckily she's never had to deal with any of the shit i did from him. however, I know he's mentally abusive in a very subtle way with her. she recognizes it and knows how to handle it, and I'm glad she feels comfortable to tell me about it whenever it happens. she only has a year left till she's 18 and hopefully she'll be able to break free of some of it.

[rex]

Aug 6, 2012 19:06:59 GMT -5 wannabe said:

yes. she is with him every other week, Friday to Friday. that's how it's been since she was 4, and luckily she's never had to deal with any of the shit i did from him. however, I know he's mentally abusive in a very subtle way with her. she recognizes it and knows how to handle it, and I'm glad she feels comfortable to tell me about it whenever it happens. she only has a year left till she's 18 and hopefully she'll be able to break free of some of it.

I don't know the laws where you live, but doesn't she have legal right to not have to see him anymore if she doesn't want to? I know it's of course not always that simple, but I hope she is able to break free soon.

When I turned 13 I was not legally obligated to any visitation with my mother. I could then choose who to live with, etc even though I was still a minor. It's just how divorce/custody stuff works here.

[Laura Palmer]

Yes by my step dad my entire life. It was horrible and no one believes me or pretends it didn't happen.

And an ex hit me with his car once.

[cjeanette]

Yes, I have. I am sure I have mentioned details in the past.

[WOT?*]

By my step-dad, my mom and my ex. My mom insists my dad was abusive toward me but I gave him plenty of chances and he didn't once raise a voice or a fist to me. She, however, was another story. I remember shoes, belts, spoons, paddles... My least favorite childhood memory was my step-dad beating me from the garage all through the house and into my room, leaving me cut, bruised and bleeding from shoulders to ankles, because I dropped a Coke bottle in the garage. My mom came in when he was done and proceeded to hit me with a belt "once for every year you've ever been a bother to me." She added one extra for good measure. She insists to this day that it never happened. The school counselor who tried to call CPS and the sheriff against my wishes, and who excused me from PE for two months, would beg to differ.

Ex choked me until I blacked out, and I moved to California with the kids. We tried to get back together but when he started hitting me in front of the kids I'd decided enough was enough (or too much.) I could handle it for me (he was disabled and I made excuse after excuse for him), but in front of the kids was not acceptable in any way, shape or form and I was gone for good at that point. No matter how many seizures or the severity, hitting me in front of the kids and me having to yell at them to call 911 is unconscionable.

Wan, I'm sorry your daughter had to grow up with the abuse and manipulation and I hope she's free of it on her next birthday.

To the rest of you, I'm sorry you went through what you did and I hope you all came out stronger and survivors in the end.

[BookLover]

My ex-husband.

[macmars45]

I voted no but one of my sisters hit, kicked and shoved me around from when I was 10-12/13. She was 14-16/17 during that time period. One time she grabbed the book I was reading out of my hands and ripped it in half before hitting me. I later found out she was struggling with bulimia that whole time (not that it excuses her behavior). She's never apologized and everyone in my immediate family pretends like it never happened.