More Gift Qs - How much? And what if we don't attend?

[Pilsy]

I just asked my husband Q1 and he said, "Let's cap it at $50."  LOL!  (That's usually my amount for showers, not a child's bday party!)  I told him to get a PT job to go with this FT one if that's the plan.  


Q1: We're receiving tons of first bday party invitations.  What's a reasonable amount to spend if our budget is tight *and* I don't want to appear tacky?  If you're wondering, yes, I'm frugal.  I came from MM and want a nice retirement, despite paying an arm and a leg for daycare, so something has to give.  


Is $20 okay or is that insulting?    


Q2: For all the parties we don't attend, do we need to send gifts?  



ETA: I shouldn't say I wouldn't spend $50 on a child's birthday gift.  We've done this for our only nephew and some really close friends.  But I'm speaking in more general terms.  No way can I do that for every child of every friend, neighbor, and coworker who might invite us to a party.  

[brooklyn]

$20 is great. I don't get gifts for parties we don't attend unless it is for a family member.

[pierogigirl]

I think $20 is fine and if I find a deal on a great present, I don't feel cheap if I've spent less. For friend parties, I don't send a gift if we can't go. If it is for family, we would do a gift even if we are not there (this has not happened yet).

[matildasun]

I spend between 10-15 per kid. I have luck finding good gifts at Marshalls.

[changedname]

I've been spending about $20-25.

No need to send a gift if you don't attend imo.

[undecidedowl]

$20 is plenty. FWIW, I've never even thought about how much the gifts cost that DS has received for his birthdays.

No need to get a gift if you don't attend. I only do for my niece and nephews.

[Deleted]

If I'm close to the person I do do upwards up $50.00 but that's close close friends kid and family.

The rest of the world. I cap at like $10.00 (coworkers b-day party kid, neighbor kids, daycare friends). At that age $10.00 goes a long way actually.

So if you're cheap I am too.

If I don't go, sending a gift is also personal dependent. I base it on a lot of factors.

[MadamePresident]

I think $20 is more than enough. Honestly I love some home made gifts as well.

[redpenmama]

I typically spend less than $20 (probably $10-$15 range) and stock up on gifts during toy clearances and Amazon sales. I wouldn't give a gift if I couldn't attend, unless it was a very close friend or family member.

[ilikedonuts]

I do $10 for playgroup birthday parties unless its someone I'm super close to (there are like 5 familes out of the 15 that we're closer with).

I also regift A LOT! I'm cheap.

[ilikedonuts]

I don't give gifts for parties we don't attend. Well except for the party we are missing tomorrow. But that's because we went to her little sister's birthday party last weekend so I just brought gifts for both.

[Pilsy]

Thanks, everyone!

[qcinoct]

$25 is what generally spend.

[shell24]

$20 is plenty, $15 is better if you can find something, and no, do not send a gift if you don't attend.

[july]

I only take a gift if I can attend. Depending on the kid, I spend $5-30. The lower range is for daycare parties.

[lg28]

We have gotten a lot of duplicate gifts and clothes the past few years and I have two bins of them in the basement to use for birthday parties. Lol. Sometimes it works, sometimes it doesn't but its awesome when it does.

Otherwise I can it at $25. And I check clearance racks for stuff!

[cricketwife]

I just wanted to add that baby cheapskate has had a lot of toy clearance deals lately, if you want to start up on bargains.

[SpartanGirl]

We aim for the $15 range for classmates or kids we don't know quite as well. We spend $20-$30 on really good friends or our friends' children.

I would not send a gift if we weren't able to attend. The only exception is if we had RSVP'd yes and were unable to attend the day of the party because someone got sick (this has happened to us quite a few times). In that case, we already had a gift, so we send it.

[mollybrown]

Most gifts we have given and received are in the $15-20 range. We go up to $30 or so for kids of good friends.

[curbsideprophet]

I think $20 is plenty. I don't think you need to give a gift if you do not attend.

[sjh722]

Another vote for $15 - $20 is plenty.

We spend $20 - $25ish on nieces/nephews too. (We have 5 of them, they get a lot of presents, and that seems to be what my other SILs spend. I'd go broke spending more for Christmas, birthdays, etc.)

[whereintheworld]

I usually spend $15 on the gift, then $5 on a card and sometimes we throw in a sheet of stickers in to the card depending on the age of the kid.

[loskadoodle]

20-25, no gift if u don't go unless it's a close friend

[GotWine]

I usually spend $20 on gifts, but try to shop sales so I can get more gift for the money. For nieces, nephew and my BFF's son I spend $40-$50.

[zarapipe]

Jan 17, 2015 10:09:25 GMT -5 ilikedonuts said:

I do $10 for playgroup birthday parties unless its someone I'm super close to (there are like 5 familes out of the 15 that we're closer with).

I also regift A LOT! I'm cheap.

This. Regift happens often and I stalk target toy clearence and amazon for good deals. If i see a toy in clearence I pick it up and put it in the closet for the next bday.

[sent]

I just took back 3 gifts from my daughter's 1st bday and they were all approximately $10 each. Two of the gifts were the Fisher Price Puppy Piano. So people like giving puppy pianos for 1st birthdays to stay under $20.  I don't have space to coordinate regifting so I just take stuff back.  

[Deleted]

Is it fine to give gifts with no gift receipt to daycare/school friends? (Regifting usually means no receipt )

[caramia17]

$15-20 seems about right from friends here. A musical puzzle, books, etc. Obviously, some people go overboard, but that doesn't seem typical.

[CloudBee]

Jan 17, 2015 17:38:58 GMT -5 @hannymaren said:

Is it fine to give gifts with no gift receipt to daycare/school friends? (Regifting usually means no receipt )

I rarely even give receipts to close friends or family, because much of what I buy is bought well in advance on clearance.

I don't think we received a single gift receipts for his 1st birthday or Christmas.