My inlaws are 45 minutes early for dinner

[mamaalysson]

45 minutes. That's like hours in a house with small children.

Fuck. Thank god for wine.

[Deleted]

Eeek. What were they thinking?

[lala]

For family, I don't think is a big deal. My inlaws do it often, it was annoying, now I expect it. I certainly am not worried about impressing them with my housekeeping skills after 10 years. That ship has sailed. I also like my ILs, so there is that.

But, drink up!

[justbecause]

My inlaws are always late so I'd take early!
Either give them the kids or have them help cook.

[mamaalysson]

My inlaws are difficult. And while they may not expect a pristine house and immaculately groomed children, I do like to be fully clothed when they come over (I wasn't), or have my children awake (one wasn't), or have DH home (he wasn't). It also would have been nice to not have had my couch covered in laundry (yup, FIL, those lacy things you moved aside were my underthings, TYVM) and the crushed Cheerios at least sort of swept up.

I did leave them to play with the kids while I put away laundry (and finished getting dressed) and pulled dinner together.

[dizzycooks]

Will they entertain the kids? My dad and stepmom did that tonight, it was fabulous so rarely do we get help around here I enjoyed my quiet time in the kitchen. Now dhs parents, not cool, they don't help.

[lexus]

I'm glad you had wine!

[lala]

Ha, I feel like I'm always upstairs half dressed when the arrive. I let them entertain the kids and try to finish up.

[mamaalysson]

Maybe I was already irritated from their early arrival, but they were in rare form tonight.

- MIL was playing this memory game with DD where you look at one side of a card and then answer questions about what you saw. It's pretty hard, and DD can't read, so we have never actually followed the rules - DD does all the looking, and we ask all the questions, and we give DD 2 or 3 flips of the timer. MIL was getting all bent out of shape that DD kept wanting more time and that she couldn't read to take turns. Dude, she 4!

- DS was woken up by their early arrival, so he was grumpy, and was fussing and crying for me while i was making dinner. Instead of picking him up, or ignoring him, FIL was mimicking his crying. He has dementia, but I don't think we can blame this one on that. He fully believes that boys shouldn't cry. But mimicking an almost 2-year-old's crying? Quit being a dick.

- They were all over the kids at dinner, snapping about their manners, shushing them when they were talking.

- Apparently DD broke something the last time she was at my SIL's house, so we got a nice lecture from MIL about DD needing to have harsher consequences for her actions

Ugh. I'm annoyed, and get to do it all over again when FIL comes for his monthly dinner on Tuesday.

[Deleted]

Wow dude. I'd be pretty ticked at at least 1/2 of those things...glad it's over!!!

[melew]

What a fun night!  
Best of luck on Tuesday.  It might be a good day to take up day drinking in preparation for the evening.

[lala]

Yea, all of those things would really annoy me. That is really frustrating, I'm sorry. I would have said something or dh would have every time.

[notreallyirish]

I can't get over the mindset of, "Geez, 4 year old, why can't you just figure out how to read?!!l

[ashb62]

They sound pleasant. I hope you started drinking early.

[momin2013]

Wow, yep, you had every right to be annoyed at any of those things, let all alone of them in one evening!

[lattelady5]

Did you say something? I would totally call that crap out, family or not.

My grandma told me the wrong time the other day and she and my aunt arrived almost an hour early. The kids had just crushed goldfish crackers all over the rug and I was still in my pajama top and sans bra lol. They weren't aholes though and played with the kids while I finished cleaning up the mess and dressing.

[mamaalysson]

Mar 2, 2015 10:11:29 GMT -5 lattelady5 said:

Did you say something? I would totally call that crap out, family or not.

My grandma told me the wrong time the other day and she and my aunt arrived almost an hour early. The kids had just crushed goldfish crackers all over the rug and I was still in my pajama top and sans bra lol. They weren't aholes though and played with the kids while I finished cleaning up the mess and dressing.

We just ignored them at first, but once they started in on DD needing more consequences, DH had sort of had it, and told them that we will deal with disciplining our kids as we see fit.

But, you guys, it got even more ridiculous, and now I'm trapped in some sort of middle school drama among adults. So, DD broke SIL's yarn winder on accident. She was told not to play with it, didn't listen, and it broke. DH was there and dealt with it. I had no idea any of this had happened. Apparently SIL said something to MIL about having to get a new one, which MIL questioned her on until she found out DD broke it. And then lectured DH on consequences. Meanwhile, I knew nothing of this, so I texted SIL to find out what happened. SIL got upset with MIL that she said something to us, and texted her to please not intervene on her behalf, and MIL is now ignoring her and texting DH that she is unhappy we told SIL that she told us. SOOO STUPID!!!! And it's not even a huge deal. I mean, it is because this not listening and sneaking is an issue right now, but it's not an issue among any of the adults involved. I told SIL we would pay to replace it and DD will be writing an apology note. We also will not be eating out this week (usually a once a week treat to get lunch or dinner somewhere) because we told DD that having to spend money to fix something that we broke means not having that money to do something fun with. I don't know if that's the right consequence, but I know none of it involves my MIL.

Why are they so crazy??

[Rainyday]

I'm on mobile, how old is your DD?

[mamaalysson]

Mar 2, 2015 10:37:54 GMT -5 Rainyday said:

I'm on mobile, how old is your DD?

4.5.

[lattelady5]

I think your H (and maybe your SIL) need to have a talk with your MIL. It's ridiculous that you're getting tossed in the middle of this absurd drama. Your DH should have told you about the yarn deal. Your SIL should have confronted you all instead of whining to MIL. Definitely pay for it and I think losing a meal out is fine as long as it's something your DD will miss or actually understand why you're not doing it.

[Deleted]

Dang, sorry, I agree about some distance from ILs. No one has time for that crap/drama and I would be soooo annoyed. Sorry you have to deal with that stupidity.

Wanted to add the way you are handling your dd sounds great to me and I would ignore IL's comments completely.

[mamaalysson]

Mar 2, 2015 12:11:46 GMT -5 @itsbritt said:

Dang, sorry, I agree about some distance from ILs. No one has time for that crap/drama and I would be soooo annoyed. Sorry you have to deal with that stupidity.

Wanted to add the way you are handling your dd sounds great to me and I would ignore IL's comments completely.

Thank you.  I appreciate that.  Her listening skills have just been awful the last week or so, and she's throwing around all this sass and attitude - "DD, please clean up the stuffed animals in your room."  "No, I'm not going to do that."  So, yes, the fact that her not listening caused something of her aunt's to be broken needs to be (and is being) addressed.  But not by MIL.

I truly don't know what her issue was last night.  She is queen of the passive aggressives and I am pretty used to that, but this was just at a whole new level.  And just to make it clear, SIL was not complaining about us to MIL.  It somehow came up in a totally different conversation that she was needing to buy a new yarn winder, and the reason followed.  She did not ask for her help, or complain that we were not handling things.  MIL just inserted herself where she had no business being and then got mad when SIL found out.  So flipping stupid.

Maybe DS getting sick will give me a reason to cancel dinner tomorrow...