If you have a daughter

[Elsa]

When you are out and about are you the only one who takes her to the bathroom?
I'm so frustrated. My H hates taking M to the bathroom in public. He says the men's restrooms are gross and it stresses him out.
But she is in that age where she wants to go all the time. I'll be in the middle of a conversation at dinner, looking at something at a shop and she wants to go AGAIN. And ladies rooms are fucking disgusting too. Tonight at Home Depot I was looking at paint chips and she said she needed to go (after she had just been 20 min earlier at the restaurant!) and I asked him to take her. He was irritated but he did. But when he got back he was PISSED. I guess they had a rough trip. I get it. I've been there.
So. Do I just need to suck it up and be the one to take her every time out in public? Or is he wrong here and he can chip in?
Ugh

[hopecounts]

Yes and it drives me crazy.

[missmaddie]

I don't have a girl, but I can see the urinals creating an awkward/gross situation. DH is quite good about being willing to take DS, but not sure of that would change if this one is a girl?

[cville]

If my husband tried that shit, I'd kill him.

She's getting older now so I handle it more often if he knows the restroom will be crowded, only has one stall, etc. Since she's more vocally curious about male female differences and no one wants to have that conversation at the Golden Corral.

[Elsa]

Mar 7, 2015 21:04:58 GMT -5 cville said:

If my husband tried that shit, I'd kill him.

She's getting older now so I handle it more often if he knows the restroom will be crowded, only has one stall, etc. Since she's more vocally curious about male female differences and no one wants to have that conversation at the Golden Corral.

Lol I'm confused! Am I the one that should be offed here or is my H?

I'm trying to figure out if I should apologize. I don't want to dammit! Lol

[killercupcake]

He's wrong.

And tell him my H who used to clean bathrooms for a living when he was 18 said the women's restrooms were always WAY nastier than the men's.

[sawyerthedestroyer]

He needs to suck it up.

H hated taking DS to the rest room when we started potty training because it's a PITA. He got over that real quick after I had a nice little chat with him.

[Elsa]

Mar 7, 2015 21:06:54 GMT -5 killercupcake said:

He's wrong.

And tell him my H who used to clean bathrooms for a living when he was 18 said the women's restrooms were always WAY nastier than the men's.

Dd likes to play with the sanitary trashcans. She likes the "cling" they make when they close.
I'm working on it with her but I throw up a little in my mouth every time she touches one.

[EmilieMadison]

When she was little (she's 9 now) and we were together, I usually took her because yeah- most men's rooms are pretty nasty. DH took her plenty of times, though, and had no problem doing it except lots of them really were gross so we preferred to bring her to the least gross option. But all hell would break loose if my husband ever complained about doing it. FUCK NO.

[emsumm]

My h takes the girls more than I do.

[killercupcake]

Mar 7, 2015 21:08:42 GMT -5 Elsa said:

Mar 7, 2015 21:06:54 GMT -5 killercupcake said:

He's wrong.

And tell him my H who used to clean bathrooms for a living when he was 18 said the women's restrooms were always WAY nastier than the men's.

Dd likes to play with the sanitary trashcans. She likes the "cling" they make when they close.
I'm working on it with her but I throw up a little in my mouth every time she touches one.

EXACTLY, Elsa's H, exactly. lol

[cville]

Mar 7, 2015 21:06:48 GMT -5 Elsa said:

Mar 7, 2015 21:04:58 GMT -5 cville said:

If my husband tried that shit, I'd kill him.

She's getting older now so I handle it more often if he knows the restroom will be crowded, only has one stall, etc. Since she's more vocally curious about male female differences and no one wants to have that conversation at the Golden Corral.

Lol I'm confused! Am I the one that should be offed here or is my H?

I'm trying to figure out if I should apologize. I don't want to dammit! Lol

Him! That's utter bullshit. Like ANYONE wants to take a 3.5 year old to a public bathroom. Like it's EVER easy and not gross. Please. Deal with it, man.

Hell, my husband probably had handled MORE of L's public potty trips because men's rooms are typically less crowded and she doesn't try as much nonsense with him as she does with me. Evens out for all those diapers I had to change because backasswards morons only put a changing table in the women's room.

[eddy]

I don't buy that guys bathrooms are grosser than womens. At stores they all get cleaned the same. And guys pee in urinals so really their toilets are used less

I took the boys into bathrooms with me.

[Elsa]

Mar 7, 2015 21:07:46 GMT -5 @tambcat said:

Well I wouldn't apologize! Let's don't get crazy. lol

Lol!
What can I say, I like to keep the peace.
He is in the bedroom now silently putting together a dresser. Lol
He is taking out his frustration in a productive way. I should make him angry more often.

[usuallylurking]

Lol, well, I "make" my H take DS1 anytime he's with us and he needs to go. The other two are still in diapers but I anticipate potty training DS2 this summer. He's never given me any grief about it, though I suppose boys are a bit easier than girls.

[starlily]

No, we both do, although H is trying to pass it off to me more often now that DD1 is getting older.

[Una]

You are not wrong here.

[Elsa]

Ok I'm glad I'm not in the wrong here. My H is pretty hard to ruffle so I question myself when he legitimately gets pissed. It happens so rarely.
We will talk when he gets over it.
I take her 99.9% of the time and am fine with that, but I need him to be willing to take her that other 1% so I don't spend half my life in a public restroom. Lol

[Elsa]

Mar 7, 2015 21:11:37 GMT -5 starlily said:

No, we both do, although H is trying to pass it off to me more often now that DD1 is getting older.

And I could definitely see if she knew what penises were and was likely to ask questions, etc, why he would be uncomfortable.
But she's three. All she wants to talk about are unicorns (not THOSE kind!) and dollies.

[revolution]

If I am there, I take her. Dh takes her if this just the 2 of them out and about. Well, now he might send her into the women's bathroom alone, I'm not sure. But if I am there, it is me.

[eb777888]

You know, I've actually always heard men's bathrooms are actually cleaner than women's. I have no idea if this is true.

I can totally see H being hesitant to take a girl into the mens room, IDK why. David is six and I still take him in to the women's when we're alone and H takes David when we are together.

[statlerwaldorf]

I usually take her unless there is a family bathroom or bathrooms meant for one person.

[starlily]

Mar 7, 2015 21:14:36 GMT -5 Elsa said:

Mar 7, 2015 21:11:37 GMT -5 starlily said:

No, we both do, although H is trying to pass it off to me more often now that DD1 is getting older.

And I could definitely see if she knew what penises were and was likely to ask questions, etc, why he would be uncomfortable.
But she's three. All she wants to talk about are unicorns (not THOSE kind!) and dollies.

Exactly. And honestly, he probably took her 90% of the time up until now when we were all out together because he's her preferred parent. There'd be a tantrum if I tried.

[LeggsBenedict]

I go into the men's bathroom at work all the time and it is just genuinely worse than the women's. like, the toilet is smaller and the seat is loose, the faucet isn't as nice, even the tile sucks.

I'm just sharing.

your h needs to suck it up.

[eddy]

We finally are at a point where I can send Jack into the bathroom on his own. It is so nice.

Now I have to PT Leo so I start all over again. Ugh

[eb777888]

lol, okay, I just asked H because I was genuinely curious about his take. He said he'd be fine with it and I'm like "really? It wouldn't be weird because it's a Men's room?" He said "no, she wouldn't use the urinal. It's not like there's a bunch of men swinging their dicks around in there." llllol.

[Elsa]

Mar 7, 2015 21:15:30 GMT -5 toledo said:

Does he never take him anywhere by himself?

He definitely does. And I know he takes her to the restroom when they are out and about. I guess he just thinks that if there is a "better" option available (me) then thats what we should go with.

[Elsa]

Mar 7, 2015 21:20:48 GMT -5 eb777888 said:

lol, okay, I just asked H because I was genuinely curious about his take. He said he'd be fine with it and I'm like "really? It wouldn't be weird because it's a Men's room?" He said "no, she wouldn't use the urinal. It's not like there's a bunch of men swinging their dicks around in there." llllol.

Lolllll
You mean they aren't in there seeing who can helicopter the best?

[Elsa]

Mar 7, 2015 21:20:01 GMT -5 eddy said:

We finally are at a point where I can send Jack into the bathroom on his own. It is so nice.

I think this might be the next milestone I am looking forward to the most. Lol

[Elsa]

Mar 7, 2015 21:23:02 GMT -5 peachy said:

Why is he pissed though?

"You told me to take her to the bathroom and I didn't wanna"?

Not trying to be snarky, but what would make him so mad about it?

I think they had a bad experience. He mentioned she had to poop. And we still wipe her butt which means her leaning over with her hands on the ground. I have her put her hands on the top of my feet but I bet he didn't think of that.
Then I'm sure he was stressed about any visible ducks. And she likes to touch stuff which is stressful in a nasty bathroom. And that's only if the trip went well. She's three, tantrums occur at the drop of a hat and are frustrating. I've come back from the bathroom with her before pissed off. I get it, I'm just mad he is pissed at me.

Eta: visible DICKS! Lollll