Post by longtimenopost on Mar 26, 2015 14:44:09 GMT -5
I thought there was artificial blood? #notadoctor
ETA I didn't think the article was bashing FFing, but it's not a sensitive topic for me. DD had donor milk as a preemie and I donated as well. Not strange to me. Actually being breastfed by another mother? That I find strange but I'm not sure why.
i actually wish fake blood were a thing. We could save a lot of lives.
Plus, I mean, vampires.
But that's kind of the point. Fake blood would save a lot of lives, like formula saves a lot of baby lives. So why be dismissive of either?
Do you think they used Tru Blood for transfusions or was it only for vamps?
Yeah, I kind of thought she was just reacting to people saying it was gross. Kind of like when people say when is breastmilk gross when you drink a milk made for another animal? Vs saying formula was this horrible thing. But who knows.
My dear friend (and fellow MMM) gave me around 100oz of her milk when my EBF baby suddenly refused to drink formula and I was going to be gone for a weekend away. I am forever grateful <3
Post by karinothing on Mar 26, 2015 15:22:27 GMT -5
I really think people are overestimating the acceptibility of donor milk. People are VERY weirded out by this. I mean people in the general populace not internet moms.
now if wet nursing was coming back, that would be interesting. Not that'd I'd do it, or prefer that to using formula but it would at least be interesting to read about, somewhat dramatic and worth a blog post. This is not worth a blog post
but then, very little is.. yet there are so very many of them ..
Post by ginkgoleaf on Mar 26, 2015 15:31:23 GMT -5
I didn't read the article, but I did breastfeed my BFF's newborn who was having trouble gaining weight. Her midwife actually suggested it since DS is 4 months older than my BFF's DD. It was really an easy way to help them out and not that weird since we're so close anyway. It was twice over the course of a weekend visit.
Another vote here for "she's very dramatic." A mom from my current baby group posted to our list serve the other day asking if any of us wanted the x number of ounces she had of BM before she donated it to a milk bank. IDK if anyone took her up on it, but obviously we haven't set any kind of "this is so gross" tone in our group meetings since she felt comfortable putting that question out there.
Nope, I've seen equal uproar about "artificial baby milk". We are not to use "fake", "artificial", or "simulated". Just "formula", and no descriptors or alternate words.
Do we really need descriptors or alternate words, though? It already has a term that we are all familiar with.
I'm not trying to argue, I promise, but "formula" is kind of an in-word in a way. It would be meaningless to a non-native English speaker. So how would you explain formula to someone unfamiliar with it? I would describe it as a formulated food for infants, meant to simulate breast milk.
Post by estrellita on Mar 26, 2015 16:02:53 GMT -5
My friend offered to do this when she has her 2nd baby in May if she has extra milk. She also told me about groups that help facilitate milk donation. I considered it, but ultimately didn't feel comfortable using a stranger's milk, and going through a milk bank is expensive and/or is usually for NICU babies or babies with health problems. I would potentially take my friend up on the offer. I know her so I know she doesn't smoke, do any drugs, and when she drinks I know it would only be minimal or she wouldn't give me the milk. I also know she eats healthy. We'll see when that time comes.
I do like comparing it to other donations like blood. Makes sense to me when you think of it that way. It's a bodily fluid, so I can understand the "gross" factor, but I think it would be equally as "gross" to put someone else's blood into my body. Yet it's acceptable and encouraged to donate other things. I would love to see milk donation become more "normal" because I think if there were an easy and reliable way to receive donations, I would probably look into it more.
But I agree that the tone of this article is dramatic. The headline is misleading. I might be a little more weirded out if she was actually BFing the other baby, not just pumping for him.
I think she was crazy only because I pump and committing to pump to an extra kid is nuts to me. Not weird for people who have extra milk and donate it.
Do we really need descriptors or alternate words, though? It already has a term that we are all familiar with.
I'm not trying to argue, I promise, but "formula" is kind of an in-word in a way. It would be meaningless to a non-native English speaker. So how would you explain formula to someone unfamiliar with it? I would describe it as a formulated food for infants, meant to simulate breast milk.
Is this a real question? Formula is marketed, heavily marketed, all over the world. Nestlé and the like have made darned sure that almost any woman of childbearing age knows what " formula" is. In the languages I speak, "artificial baby milk" is not the accepted term.
Post by SallySparrow on Mar 26, 2015 16:38:20 GMT -5
A friend offered me pumped milk for Amelia when I couldn't make enough. It was very sweet of her, and I didn't think it was weird at all. We ended up not taking her up on it because DH wasn't comfortable.
We have a milk bank in the area that provides donated milk to our NICU babies. It's awesome.
I have 1) donated milk to a friend, 2) accepted donated milk from a friend, 3) nursed a couple of my friend's children and 4) organized and delivered several milk transactions between friends.
Judge away. I'm a major hippy in this regard, but there is no greater bond of friendship than sharing breast milk.
Salma Hayek breastfed a random baby in Africa, and it was a BIG DEAL. Feeding another woman's baby is a total taboo.
She put the other baby on her breast, didn't she? I'm not saying that is bad or weird (as long as you have a parent's say so) but it is different from what this woman is describing in the bog where the other mother fed her pumped breast milk.
Yeah, I realize that. I was furthering the discussion on the taboo, and that we're not really over it. The woman in the blog is a diva, but that doesn't mean there aren't plenty of people that think anything to do with a boob is gross. Except sex, of course, because that's what they're about.
Post by DarcyLongfellow on Mar 26, 2015 16:57:57 GMT -5
I'm late to this discussion and didn't read page 2, but I feel like answering anyway :-)
I think the author was absolutely trying to be inflammatory by saying "nurse" instead of "pump" in her headline, but either way, I don't think it's that big a deal.
Donor milk seems like a pretty accepted concept, although I am probably living in a bubble. I was so disappointed that I couldn't donate milk because I'm on Lexapro. (I understand WHY, I just wish I had been able to donate milk.)
Also, flame me if you want, but I'd totally nurse (as in, actually put to the breast) a relative or close friend's child. Not without the parents' permission, of course, since I understand some people find that weird. My opinion on this has changed over my years of nursing, though.
When DD1 was tiny, our neighbor and I were talking and she mentioned that when she was a young mom she and her best friend would babysit each other's kids and instead of giving formula, they would just nurse both babies. (This was in the 60's or 70's so pumping wasn't as commonly done.) When she first told me I thought it was a little weird, but now I don't. I remember all the uproar over Salma Hayek that someone else mentioned, and I remember thinking people were overreacting.
Well it's badically what wet nurses did back in the day so it's not exactly new.
From the title, I thought this was going to go a different way. "Friend left her screaming, hungry baby with me so I nursed him and now she has the nerve to be upset!" Or something like that. Lol.
I thought she was upset that her friend formula fed so BFed him behind her back. I was prepared to be all WTF!!
I'm not trying to argue, I promise, but "formula" is kind of an in-word in a way. It would be meaningless to a non-native English speaker. So how would you explain formula to someone unfamiliar with it? I would describe it as a formulated food for infants, meant to simulate breast milk.
Is this a real question? Formula is marketed, heavily marketed, all over the world. Nestlé and the like have made darned sure that almost any woman of childbearing age knows what " formula" is. In the languages I speak, "artificial baby milk" is not the accepted term.
I don't know what I did to make you so aggressive toward me. It's been going on for a while. My question was how would a person define formula to someone unfamiliar with it. Perhaps I could have asked how one would explain it to a child.
I would never call it "artificial baby milk" because babies don't make milk.
I guess too it depends on what we consider breastfeeding. If you EP, do you consider yourself a breastfeeder? (That's a serious question). I've never thought too much about it before.
I EPd for awhile with my first and I say I breastfed, but where appropriate, I clarify that I didn't nurse. It really depends on the conversation. If I'd given milk to a friend's baby to take from a bottle, I wouldn't say I "breastfed" them. I'd say I donated breastmilk to a friend.
I think the terms are kind of weird. I remember being asked if I was breastfeeding or "bottle-feeding" E, and I didn't know how to answer. Both? He was breastfed when we were together, and fed breast milk from a bottle when we weren't... but that's not why the doctor at urgent care was asking, right? LOL.
I don't think donating milk is weird or gross. Hell, I don't think nursing a non-biological child is gross. I don't know why she brought the formula war into it.
So I have a friend who is very passionate about BFing. She's fairly crunchy and had a home birth for her first. She was recently pregnant with her second and had placenta previa, so knew she would need a c-section. She had additional risks because of her exact placenta location. She and her H had it all planned out and organized that if she was seriously ill or died they were getting donated breastmilk. AND, because the research shows that babies take to the breast the best within 2 hours of nursing, she organized with her doula/labour support person/good friend that the baby would latch on to her after birth (friend is not nursing, this is just so the baby could latch). At first I was a little taken aback when she told me this but then I thought, "oh well, it's not hurting anyone and if they are all cool with it then who cares!"
She ended up needing an emergency c-section a week earlier than her scheduled one and the baby and her were fine and she was able to nurse right away so it ended up being a moo point (see what I did there?), but it was interesting planning!
I had a deal with one of my very close friends similar to this. We'd take care/nurse each others kids in the event that we were stuck somewhere, seriously injured, or worse until said child was a year. I had to nurse her child a few times when weather screwed up her return flight home, her husband ran out of milk, and I had none frozen.
We called it our milk-swear (like a pinky-swear lol). She was forever grateful and I was so happy to help a mama in distress.
Post by londoncalling on Mar 26, 2015 18:49:33 GMT -5
I donated pumped milk through a milk bank. Everyone that I talked about it with thought that it was cool that something like that even existed. I would nurse someone else's baby at my breast too if they wanted me to. I would let someone close to me nurse my kids as well.
My grandma wet nursed her neighbor's baby when the neighbor died in childbirth and the father needed help in the beginning. I think that's awesome and was something I didn't know about her until I was nursing my own baby and she decided to share with me.
catbus, I'm sorry if you feel like my annoyance with this article spilled over to you. I read your question as either supporting the way that the author of this piece compared formula to fake blood or as implying that formula is a word only native English speakers use. I'm not sure what else you think I've done, so I'll leave it at that.
I guess too it depends on what we consider breastfeeding. If you EP, do you consider yourself a breastfeeder? (That's a serious question). I've never thought too much about it before.
I did not exclusively pump, but I consider EPers and anyone that nurses and pumps/bottle feeds to be a breastfeeder. They are feeding milk that came from their breasts. I'm sure others feel differently, but I do not reserve the term "breastfeeder" for only those that nurse exclusively. Very few women actually nurse exclusively anymore.