I literally don't even know what half of that means. What is a sustainable wine? Do the vineyards create their own rain or something?
I need you to live blog her visit.
What do I feed her for breakfast?
Isn't the true ML question: what will your husband be feeding her? Honestly, you're a saint. I'd leave a bowl of fruit and be like, yeah, your list seemed pretty strict and we didn't want to mess up.
What kind of laundry detergent do you wash your towels in? Is it sulfate free and eco-friendly? What about the soap you use to wash your dishes? Is your coffee fair trade? I assume your coffee creamer is just whole milk humanely extracted from the goats living next door.
Just thinking ahead for you.
Hey, didn't someone say that breast milk is sustainable?
How is Capt. Sustainable arriving? Solar powered car? Bicycle? Has she purchased carbon offsets for any traditional transportation (like car or airplane...eww)
Isn't the true ML question: what will your husband be feeding her? Honestly, you're a saint. I'd leave a bowl of fruit and be like, yeah, your list seemed pretty strict and we didn't want to mess up.
H is fine figuring this out on his own.
I however have this thing where I hate serving people most kinds of pre-made or processed things from the store. The idea of giving a guest cereal gives me hives. This is my issue, not my H's, and I sure as hell am not going to tell him that he needs to make her breakfast that meets my hosting standards.
I am willing to throw that out the window for a situation like this because I don't get hives from someone who is annoying.
Isn't the true ML question: what will your husband be feeding her? Honestly, you're a saint. I'd leave a bowl of fruit and be like, yeah, your list seemed pretty strict and we didn't want to mess up.Â
H is fine figuring this out on his own.
I however have this thing where I hate serving people most kinds of pre-made or processed things from the store. The idea of giving a guest cereal gives me hives. This is my issue, not my H's, and I sure as hell am not going to tell him that he needs to make her breakfast that meets my hosting standards.
I am willing to throw that out the window for a situation like this because I don't get hives from someone who is annoying.
I don't understand why you wouldn't deliberately serve this woman Lucky Charms.
Can you make her some kind of drinking game? Like, every time she says something ridiculous you take a hit of closet wine*?
Closet wine is TM @this.
I love this.
H will be designated driver in Napa. Oh yes.
But every time she says the word sustainable, I'm allowing myself to spend $10 more at Sephora. That is how I'm going to get through it, but also preserve my liver.
Can you make her some kind of drinking game? Like, every time she says something ridiculous you take a hit of closet wine*?
Closet wine is TM @this.
I love this.
H will be designated driver in Napa. Oh yes.
But every time she says the word sustainable, I'm allowing myself to spend $10 more at Sephora. That is how I'm going to get through it, but also preserve my liver.
But every time she says the word sustainable, I'm allowing myself to spend $10 more at Sephora. That is how I'm going to get through it, but also preserve my liver.
You should look into the stupidity of biodynamic wines. And then go ask someone to describe it. Take a drink every time you think it has to be a parody. And live blog of course.
Suggest to her you know a great place to go look for sustainable twigs and berries.
I'm all for accommodating guests, but weird guests who make fusses and are vague receive less accommodation. There's no way short of mind reading for anyone to know what her "limited amounts of limited dairy" would include, so I would be honest and reply "I'm not sure if what we have on hand will qualify, but you're welcome to anything we have. And I'll try to have a short list of grocery stores and restaurants that will be able to provide you with what you need." I would make some effort to buy foods that I think she would eat, but I wouldn't stray too far from what we would normally eat, so it doesn't go to waste if it doesn't meet her criteria. And I would ask for specific breakfast foods. GF oats and granola are pricey, and if she's not going to want them, I don't want to spend the extra money on them.
For the picnic, what about Fiesta Bean Salad for her? It's awesome, and I believe it would qualify. Then maybe hummus, tapenade, and GF crackers, and some fresh fruits and veggies cut to snacking size. Whole Foods should have a decent GF brownie or cookie option if she eats sweets.
And I would leave it up to her to figure out where the sustainable wineries are. Maybe add something like "Unfortunately, I don't know the first thing about where the sustainable wineries are. If you know of some, let us know and we can plan our visits around them."
I am fretting about having to socialize with someone like this, because she's obviously a total pretentious weirdo.
Accommodate and mess with her. So, take her to a few of the sustainable wineries etc, if she gets annoying just wander away, go taste stuff lala.
Then for lunch go to In and Out and talk about how delicious it is while she eats her picnic. That way she also has to sit there and just STFU for awhile. If she starts to lecture you, just ohh and ahh more about how yummy it is and how famished you were.
Then go to another winery but make sure it's a bad one. Like Fras Villiage or whatever it was in "Sideways."
Take yourself extremely seriously to make her kind of uncomfortable.