So, Mother's Day - and grandmas

[hermione]

I hosted Mother's Day every year for a decade - my parents, SILs (and my brothers and their kids). Once I had C, my SIL called and said she'd take over for the next decade, lol. Sometimes we do it on Saturday, sometimes Sunday.

[dancingirl21]

I totally agree with you. We have to go to brunch at my BIL/SIL's house with DH's full extended family AND dress up. Are you kidding me?! No offense to them, but I'm not that interested in spending my Mother's Day with my IL's.

[pugz]

also thank for posting this because it reminded me to email my family about our plans.

I'm going to an indie craft fair next weekend and hoping to find gifts there, otherwise it is flowers for both moms.

[patbutcher]

My MIL is very into celebrations. Like, we actually have to have a big family dinner and dessert for national ice cream day, I'm not joking. She needs an excuse to get everyone together.

Last year was the first MD I attended. (My first as a mother). Before that H used to go on his own or I was on a business trip. My mum died when I was young and I was TTTC so not really into MD. Last year we did a brunch at my house. Not sure about this year. I really don't care about MD that much, I guess I'm used to H's family taking over every event anyway. (eg I have always maintained that I don't want a big fuss at my birthday but we have to have a party because MIL wants to celebrate it. nice).

[Brie]

My childless sister wanted me to fly solo to Chicago with both kids to surprise my mom this Mother's Day. I shot that down reeeeal fast. LOL.

[meij]

I've only ever sent cards. Set the standards low as an 18 year and you will reap the benefits as 35 year old.

My first Mother's Day wound up being my BIL graduation from college. My MIL spent the day saying all graduations should be on Mother's Day because there is no greater gift than watching your child graduate! I kept thinking but it's a sucky Mother's Day for the rest of us who are now stuck spending it watching someone graduate.

[countthestars]

We are spending MDW in Philly with my BIL and MIL. I'm planning to "celebrate" the following weekend for me on Sunday and my mom on Saturday.

This reminds me that H's other siblings should be kissing our feet for taking MIL away for the weekend.

[water*drop]

We send cards to our moms. It wasn't a big deal in either of our houses growing up, though. It's not a huge deal to me now, either. This is in part due to DD's age, but so far DH and I have used Mother's Day and Father's Day as days for us to express our gratitude to each other for our roles in parenting vs a day for DD to express HER gratitude to us. I kind of like it that way since it means we still get celebrated, but there's no pressure on DD to do some huge celebration for us once she's the mom in the trenches.

[badtzmaru22]

I've decided as a result of this, we are going to get SIL a gift (probably flowers) as well, because we will see her at the ILs, and dang it, she is currently mothering, and might not be thrilled about continuing to be guilted into celebrating her mom either. (MIL issues for me today... Lol!)

[halfpint]

Apr 23, 2015 14:28:35 GMT -5 Brie said:

My childless sister wanted me to fly solo to Chicago with both kids to surprise my mom this Mother's Day. I shot that down reeeeal fast. LOL.

[oliviapope]

Apr 23, 2015 14:06:01 GMT -5 dancingirl21 said:

I totally agree with you. We have to go to brunch at my BIL/SIL's house with DH's full extended family AND dress up. Are you kidding me?! No offense to them, but I'm not that interested in spending my Mother's Day with my IL's.

This was my life too-ugh! My solution was to move 500 miles away.

MD is almost always the weekend of our anniversary and my MIL always made it all about her. If we so much as thought about changing the plans she would flip out. I was so annoyed about spending every single holiday scheduling around her plans.

This year I will be in the keys alone with my husband. My poor mom gets all my kids.

[whiskeyandwine]

I guess I feel like my mom didn't stop being a mom when I became one. In fact, I think it is even easier for me to understand her on a lot of levels now. I am willing to sacrifice a little of my day to make sure her's feels special too.

I'm not saying you still have to spend the kind of $$ you did when you were younger and single and had fewer obligations (like kids and a MIL who you had to consider as well), but I don't understand the "It's my turn!" mentality.