WWYD Re: gifts from grandparents

[picksthemusic]

So as many of you know, we see my ILs frequently. Like twice a month if not more. Every. Single. Visit, MIL has a 'surprise' for M. A lot of the time it's clothes and I'm mostly ok with that. But most other times it's toys (yesterday she got Anna and Kristoff dolls). They are for no reason other than MIL felt like it. To me it feels like she is trying to either a) buy her affection (which she doesn't need to do), or b) be the 'fun grandma'. I've talked to J about it and how I don't want them getting her presents all the time because presents should be for special occasions, not just because. Once in a blue moon random gifts are ok but all the time? It clutters up our house, and she is never impressed or super excited because it's just another thing. J doesn't think it's a problem, because he thinks if they see she isn't appreciative then they'll stop. Um, no. They fully support their own lazy children. Why would spoiling their grandchildren be different?

I know J needs to be the one to stop this behavior but if he doesn't feel it's a problem, and they certainly don't see it as a problem, I am the bitchy mom.

WWYD?

[dana86]

Next time they give a toy just start being a little louder than normal and say things like 'ok, well this means when we go home you need to pick out 5 toys to donate.' or ' We will put this toy up for a later time because you already have far too many toys to play with right now. But say thank you.' Maybe something that would get the hint across without just being out right.

[shevacc]

Can she leave the toys at Grandma's house? Then it's her problem, not yours. "Oh, look! You already have a (doll/bear/Frozen character) at home. Let's leave this here so you can play with it next time you visit Grandma!" I'm assuming grandma might try to push back but if you pull that stunt on the way out the door, it just might work.

[jamer]

Apr 28, 2015 14:06:57 GMT -5 shevacc said:

Can she leave the toys at Grandma's house? Then it's her problem, not yours. "Oh, look! You already have a (doll/bear/Frozen character) at home. Let's leave this here so you can play with it next time you visit Grandma!" I'm assuming grandma might try to push back but if you pull that stunt on the way out the door, it just might work.

Oh this is a great idea.