Let me tell YOU about the ped appt from hell

[OHMBLEEGOHHHHH!]

Wait in waiting room for hour. Bria is getting very impatient (she can be contained for roughly 4 minutes before throwing a tantrum).
Get back to waiting room and undress her for her weight check. I hadn't brought the diaper bag, we were in a mad rush to get out the door. She pooped. Nurse gives me some wipes, but the only diaper they had was an underjammer. Yeah. You could have fit another Cami in there with her. Get her measured (still 20th percentile for weight. 75th for height, 90th for head. She's a weeble wobble).
Wait in room for HALF AN HOUR. Bria has had no nap, and screams her fucking head off for half. an. hour. While sitting, thankfully, on the floor, pees through underjammer all over floor. Dances in it and rolls through it while I am trying to clean it up.
Needs 4 shots. Knows what is about to happen every time they clean an area and begins clinging to me, trying desperately to climb up and giving me the WHY ARE YOU LETTING THEM HURT ME eyes every time they do it.
Through this all, Kristen is halfway up my ass, whining, "I am BORRRRRUHED. I'm so HUNNGGRRRRY. Can we go to McDOOHHHHNALDSSSS? When is it our TURRRRRRRN? HAHA CAMI YOU HAVE TO GET SHAAAAAHTS!!" HAHA, SHE PEED! OH, SHE'S IN THE PEE! OH SHE'S COVERED IN PEE! OH HER PEE SMELLZ! I WANT TO GET DOWN ON THE FLOOR AND PLAY? WHY CAN'T *IIIIIII* PLAY???"

[OHMBLEEGOHHHHH!]

Booze. It's what's for dinner.

[OHMBLEEGOHHHHH!]

OH! And I have to call the ins company, we realized that someone hit my passenger side mirror at the fair and it's hanging off.

[joenali]

DRINK. NOW.

[OHMBLEEGOHHHHH!]

And I may have to get rid of Lucille already, she's judging me and I hate her.

[SKP82]

OMG I had anxiety just reading that. Get yourself a glass of wine STAT!

[ThirdandLong]

You're a trooper. Way to stay strong and not kill a kid ;-)

[mamasaurus]

Is there enough booze in the world for this?

[drrn04]

oh god.

That is hell. That sucks more than words can adequately describe.

[Deleted]

Wow, I'm sorry! That sounds like hell.

[pittsmcgee]

I admire your patience! Fuck that shit

[speckledfrog]

Oh, honey. That is awful. You deserve a prize. I big glass of prize.

[OHMBLEEGOHHHHH!]

ELL OH ELL.
I lost my phone, and was getting SUPER pissed off because I NEED TO CALL THE INS COMPANY. I called it, and SwaggerCat began looking extremely annoyed.
Because he was stretched out on top of it, and it was vibrating under him.
GET THE FUCK OUT OF HEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEERE

[Deleted]

It makes me feel better that I'm not the only one whose first reaction was "DRINKS ARE NEEDED NOW"


SwaggerCat made me giggle.

[OHMBLEEGOHHHHH!]

I have a Two Hundred and Fifty Dollar Deductible!
WELL THE WHOLE WORLD CAN JUST GO EAT A BUNCH OF ROTTING SHIT, CAN'T IT.

[cbwm1]

Oh man.

I definitely agree that drinking is in order.

[eightangryreindeer]

whoa

[callalily]

Holy Hell. Drink up.

[BlackCanary]

Aug 13, 2012 14:49:45 GMT -5 puddleofgrace said:

Days like this, this is the ONLY way to go. Big hugs to you. OMFG. You deserve it.

This.

You can buy the bottle of wine giant glass here-
www.vat19.com/dvds/bottle-of-wine-glass.cfm ;D

Or there is always chugging straight from the bottle. I advocate either one.

[Jermys]

Jeeeeeeeeezus. There should be a service that takes your kid to shit like this.

[OHMBLEEGOHHHHH!]

Giant wine glasses? I did a swig of vodka.

[OHMBLEEGOHHHHH!]

I do need someone to take my car to the shop and get an estimate done. And also grocery shopping.
Cami's passed out and I have no desire to wake her.

[louloudi87]

Dude, that sucks. I'm sorry.

[sawyerthedestroyer]

Aug 13, 2012 15:39:51 GMT -5 OHMBLEEGOHHHHH! said:

Giant wine glasses? I did a swig of vodka.

Exactly. After a day like that there's no time for glasses!