Oh god. I underestimated Boring. NOW I've broke.

[Ohhmm(bligo)]

10 hrs
Woohoo! I'm sure all the 1st grade at * elementary are going to be excited. I'm going in next week to talk to them about writing. Of course, they can't read what I write yet, but DS's teacher wanted me to go in and talk to them. First it was just her class, now it all 3 of the first-grade classes. Fingers crossed I do well with talking to them. I'm excited. Yes, I can get excited over little things!!




I ran out of bed to share this with you guys.

[MixedBerryJam]

I she going to read a passage from one of her novels? Can you go with her and videotape it for us? Please?

[Ohhmm(bligo)]

I should encourage her to record it! She DID do video and pictures of her fucking sink draining, so this shouldn't be hard.

[MixedBerryJam]

Apr 30, 2015 6:01:12 GMT -5 Ohhmm(bligo) said:

I should encourage her to record it! She DID do video and pictures of her fucking sink draining, so this shouldn't be hard.

Because everyone will be interested in seeing it! Think of your fans, Boring!

[cuddlyevil]

So it's really a lesson in how not to be a writer?

#justletmehavethisonething

[jellymankelly]

"Kids, you don't really need to stay in school. You can write like you have a third grade education and still be a published author!"

[Deleted]

"Ok kids, we have a special guest today who is going to teach us how to be BORING AS FUCK!"

[captainobvious]

"Mommy, timmy's mommy came to school today and read is her book. She writes like I do, can I write a book?"

[lexxasaurus]

Apr 30, 2015 6:01:12 GMT -5 Ohhmm(bligo) said:

I should encourage her to record it! She DID do video and pictures of her fucking sink draining, so this shouldn't be hard.

Pose it to her as a learning experience. "You can watch it and plan your NEXT speaking engagement! I will help!" You must then bring us a copy.

[sporky]

I cannot imagine what she must have told the teachers to get that invite. Bless those little children's hearts.

[Ohhmm(bligo)]

Apr 30, 2015 8:04:08 GMT -5 cuddlyevil said:

So it's really a lesson in how not to be a writer?

#justletmehavethisonething

This is what I'm pulling for.  A Cautionary Tale.  Like the people who come in and tell you their horrible, heartbreaking stories to keep you off the drugs.

[cuddlyevil]

It's scared straight, except for writers.

[chickadee77]

Wait, what? Why can't they read what he writes? Can kids no longer read in the first grade, or is Boring some magical language that is not comprehended until one is older?

[textbookcase]

Apr 30, 2015 19:45:03 GMT -5 chickadee77 said:

Wait, what? Why can't they read what he writes? Can kids no longer read in the first grade, or is Boring some magical language that is not comprehended until one is older?

I think her steamy YA romances are too steamy for them.

ALTHOUGH I WOULDN'T KNOW, BECAUSE SOMEONE WON'T SHARE LINKS TO HER BOOKS WITH THE REST OF THE CLASS.

[UMaineTeach]

sure, the teacher wanted her...
in NO WAY did she invite herself!

[chickadee77]

Apr 30, 2015 19:47:08 GMT -5 textbookcase said:

Apr 30, 2015 19:45:03 GMT -5 chickadee77 said:

Wait, what? Why can't they read what he writes? Can kids no longer read in the first grade, or is Boring some magical language that is not comprehended until one is older?

I think her steamy YA romances are too steamy for them.

ALTHOUGH I WOULDN'T KNOW, BECAUSE SOMEONE WON'T SHARE LINKS TO HER BOOKS WITH THE REST OF THE CLASS.

Lol. Ahhhh, the classic "can't " rather than "shouldn't "!

[Ohhmm(bligo)]

Apr 30, 2015 19:47:08 GMT -5 textbookcase said:

Apr 30, 2015 19:45:03 GMT -5 chickadee77 said:

Wait, what? Why can't they read what he writes? Can kids no longer read in the first grade, or is Boring some magical language that is not comprehended until one is older?

I think her steamy YA romances are too steamy for them.

ALTHOUGH I WOULDN'T KNOW, BECAUSE SOMEONE WON'T SHARE LINKS TO HER BOOKS WITH THE REST OF THE CLASS.

CHECK YER PHONE AND SHADDUP

[nsl]

Apr 30, 2015 6:35:46 GMT -5 nicbreeful said:

I'm guessing none of the teachers have actually read any of her work..

I'm guessing none of the teachers want to plan a lesson for those 45 minutes.  Free grading/gossiping/sitting down and taking a goddamn break period!

[Ohhmm(bligo)]

Apr 30, 2015 19:45:03 GMT -5 chickadee77 said:

Wait, what? Why can't they read what he writes? Can kids no longer read in the first grade, or is Boring some magical language that is not comprehended until one is older?

I was wondering that too - kids who are at the end of their first grade year should know how to read.

Then I remembered that *we* can't make sense of her boolshit.

[nancybotwin]

This is what I need to believe:

The teacher emailed all the parents. "We need some volunteers to help in the classroom one hour after writing time for some neat project that has no academics tied to it."

BMW: "I'm going to help with writing!"

Teacher: "thanks, everyone, for volunteering! Just to let you know - all of the classes will be together for this super fun project that is all about crafts and no writing!"

BMW: "now I am talking to all the classes!"

I. Must. Believe.