My daughter made me SO ANGRY

[bab]

I was washing up dinner dishes and came in the living room to find her shoving Ava in the face!

Ava was sitting on the sofa (apparently in the spot she wanted) so she decided she would start pushing Ava's face to make her move over :@ :@ :@ :@

Ava was just siting there with a normal expression on her face. I don't think Abby was hurting her (yet) but it pissed me off beyond belief.

I am appalled!! I can't believe she could ever think this was an acceptable thing to do.
I immediately sent her to her room after she apologized. I did blow up at her when she was in her room. I asked her if she thought it was OK to hit Ava since she can't tell her to STOP. OMG I have never been more infuriated by my own kid.

I know this kind of sibling BS is normal to a certain degree, but for some reason it is very upsetting when you know one child is considerably more vunlerable than the other.

[underwaterrhymes]

I don't know what to say, other than I don't blame you for being infuriated (we only have cats so far and it pisses me off when one picks on the other). I think you handled this so well. You're a wonderful mom and both girls are so lucky to have you.

[cbwm1]

I'm sorry, bab. I cannot imagine how incredibly frustrating that is. :-(

[bab]

That is right mofongo. Is your friend and ABA therapist? If she knows of any good parenting resources for helping an NT sibling that would be great.

[Jermys]

Aw, BAB Hugs, man, that's rough. What did Ava say when you got her in her room?

[bab]

Aug 14, 2012 18:49:16 GMT -5 Jermys said:

Aw, BAB Hugs, man, that's rough. What did Ava say when you got her in her room?

It was Abby who got sent to her room.

She said she shoved Ava because she was sitting on the part of the sofa she wanted. I asked her why she didn't just tell Ava to move over a little and she shrugged her shoulders.
Ava understands everything people are saying, she just has a VERY difficult time expressing herself, especially in "unfamiliar" circumstances. If Abby told her "move over" she would have.

She is not great with spontaneous communication and since no one hits her, she wouldn't just say "stop hitting," or something of that nature. She has no frame of refrence for it.

[Jermys]

OMG that makes me sad Give Ava a hug from me, okay?

[ralphlauren]

I understand you upset. I think she did it more do out of sibling riverly than the fact that your daughter could not tell her to stop. Trust me, when I say my twin and I used to beat the shit out of each other and at times were very physical with each other. That being said she is my best friend in the whole world.

[bab]

Aug 14, 2012 19:13:17 GMT -5 ralphlauren said:

I understand you upset. I think she did it more do out of sibling riverly than the fact that your daughter could not tell her to stop. Trust me, when I say my twin and I used to beat the shit out of each other and at times were very physical with each other. That being said she is my best friend in the whole world.

I'm sure you are right. My sister and I are less than 2 years apart and we used to beat the shit out of one another! We are total BFF's. LOL
It just hurt to watch because I am TERRIFIED of Ava being bullied. I am so overly sensitive about it. I would hate to think she woud suffer at the hands of her own twin sister.

[Deleted]

Aug 14, 2012 19:13:17 GMT -5 ralphlauren said:

I understand you upset. I think she did it more do out of sibling riverly than the fact that your daughter could not tell her to stop. Trust me, when I say my twin and I used to beat the shit out of each other and at times were very physical with each other. That being said she is my best friend in the whole world.

I agree with this. My kids jack with each other all the time and I have to hand out the same, "Are you fucking high?" beatdown.

[papie]

I think you handled it perfectly you are an awesome mom. (((hugs)))

[lovedan]

oh babs- I'm so sorry. I'm upset just hearing about it.


you are an excellent mother.

[Marle]

Oh Gosh BAB I'm sorry. I remember how much my heart hurt when I witnessed the first time a kid attempted to bite Logan. I saw his face of "WTH is happening" and I almost cried. Now I imagine that and double it 'cause it's your other kid doing it. ( hugs)

Abby probably needs to learn all these things still.

[HiC]

Yes, I'd be pissed too. And I imagine that it does boil down to simple sibling frustration stuff. Aside from you and dh, Abby will be her sister's biggest protector and advocate....unless of course, she's sitting in her spot on the sofa . Would Ava had a some sort of reaction if she didn't like it, cry out, yell something?

[eightangryreindeer]

hugs.