A feel good moment- my mil runs a daycare. A middle schooler just walked in to pick up his cousin. To make small talk I asked him what grade he was in and he said 7th. I said I was an 8th grade teacher. He told me I looked familiar and if I ever taught at ABC elementary school. I replied yes that I did a semester student teaching years ago in first grade. He goes "miss g?? Is that you??" He was in my first class ever and I totally remember him and his number in class! He was totally one of my favorites that year, a little ESL guy. He was a little stinker then and he's grown up to be an adorable, polite seventh grader. He totally gave me a hug and said he will pick up his cousin again soon for his grandma to tell me about the other kiddos in the class and that he's gonna tell everyone that he saw me tonight. Lol but totally just made my day!
Thanx ladies. I am wondering if MIL is starting to realize that we are turning down all invites for Sunday dinners at her place. (We normally go every Sunday I am not working, and DH goes when I am working.) and if she realizes this I wonder if she will realize why? As she was there when SIL was asking about me being pregnant, I could tell it was awkward for MIL because she didn't know what to do or say so she just changed the topic. :/
Unfortunately I do have to see SIL once a week because we are on the same dragon boating team, but there I am just polite to her and my friends on the team and I just usually stay away from SIL and everyone she sis with.
DH is on my shit list. We planned on going to our neighbors' Bon fire for months. He decided something else was more important, which pissed me off. We planned to go to our neighbor's Bon fire for months. BFF was going to be my date and now she wants to bring her husband. I know it won't be a problem with my neighbors'. I was looking forward to a husband free time. DH better show up after dark. At least I am making sangria so if I drink too much I only have to walk up the hill.
(((awick14))) I'm sorry your SIL is so horrible. Mine doesn't sound nearly as terrible now, but we can be a club together! Ugh! I hope she smartens up.
(((estrellita))) ugh money issues are so tough I'm sorry. Do you guys come out on top with you working? Would it be helpful to find something part time so you could stay home for a few days a week to cut down on daycare costs? (Again I have no idea) money sucks
Post by luv2rn4fun on May 29, 2015 17:05:23 GMT -5
So many ((hugs)) awick14. I'm so sorry your SIL is so unbelievably insensitive
amaranth- That's the hard thing...I can't take baby aspirin or progesterone while breastfeeding. Well, baby aspirin is for TTC and progesterone is once we get a BFP. I'm super conflicted because I feel so strongly that baby aspirin was the game changer with C but I also don't want to wean C to start TTC. Take baby aspirin out of the equation and we might TTC sooner...it's hard- don't want to wean C but also don't want to go through the heartbreak of a loss, especially knowing that baby aspirin might have prevented it.
ewall- Sorry to hear M won't nap well or on schedule for you too. It's so frustrating. Hope he figures that out soon...hey, I figure once he's down to 2-3 naps it really can't be that bad, right?
@moonbeam- You have nothing to worry about! Even with all of C's crappy sleep, he is SO worth it! I honestly cannot say enough how much I absolutely just love our little guy to pieces! Yes, I'm tired but when he gives me a hug, kiss, and a look that shows me I'm his favorite person in the whole world...really nothing can compete with that! As for pregnancy/birth/etc...I am average size (129 lb pre-pg), gained 30 lbs (so average/normal...all baby weight)...I had grand plans for a natural birth and was dead set against a c/s (of course unless absolutely necessary to get him here safe)...yeah, I was induced at 41 wks and it went downhill super fast with an emergency c/s. Recovery was SUPER easy and I have zero complaints...basically everything I didn't want but am totally fine knowing he's here safe and healthy and that's all that matters!
Post by estrellita on May 29, 2015 17:51:43 GMT -5
luv2rn4fun We are going to stay in this area for a bit longer. I just can't leave my job. I'm afraid I won't get as lucky as I am right now with a good schedule, no weekends, and great benefits. We are looking for cheaper apartments though. Hopefully we can find something that works! I'm fine with taking my parents up on the offer to help but I'm not sure what I need help with most. My mom offered to pay off my student loans with their HE loan and have us just make those payments, but even though it's a lower interest rate, the payments would be a little higher. If we didn't have those damn loans I think we'd be ok. We've been fine with diapers because we started doing cloth at home (in the process of getting more because we run out fast and have to wash them so often right now) and bought a huge box when Amazon had a good sale. We just had to buy more formula for home and daycare, so that sucked. Makes me even more annoyed now that BFing didn't work out because then formula wouldn't be an expense Oh well I guess.
travelbug I make more than H actually, so if anyone were to stay home because of money, it would be him. He could work from home but it's hard for him to work and pay attention to E, so that wouldn't really work. Daycare costs per month are about one of my paychecks (I get paid bi-weekly) so it is worth it for both of us to work. There is absolutely no way we could afford our bills one either of our incomes even with eliminating daycare costs. If I worked part time, I probably wouldn't even be breaking even with daycare costs.
awick14 your SIL sounds like an insensitive jerk, how rude. I don't blame you for not attending dinners anymore.
i can commiserate with you a bit. My MIL, who is honestly not a bitch and I have a good relationship with, is just so insensitive about TTC stuff. She doesn't know the difficulties we've been having, but she said to me earlier this month that she thinks it's time for her to have another grandchild, with this stern look that I interpreted as "get on that soon, you have waited long enough, you are getting old." Now I do realize that I may be reading into her expression and tone, but I have reason to believe that that's what she really thinks.
I think I need a therapist, I am so scared. Like, legit, in-tears scared. I have other health issues that all of this is exacerbating. And my MIL keeps saying I'm so small and will the baby weigh enough and that I'll have an excruciating birth and shit and she's trying to guilt me into having a shower, but her side of the family is filled with loud-mouthed old bitches. And my H is really stressed out and not feeling well lately because he is eating nothing but junk. I finally have an appointment with an OB next week, but I'm just so scared they'll tell me that my body is fucked up and how could I be so irresponsible to get pregnant. I need a hug lol.
My sister is 5'2" and 90 pounds. She pushed out 2 healthy, full term, 7 pound babies--the second only took 3 pushes. Pre pregnancy size means jack shit and your MIL needs to stfu.
Um...so my BIL is moving out tomorrow to an apartment. He's currently out on a blind date. My ILS are currently packing his stuff into boxes for him....he's 25 freaking years old.
estrellita & pooh8402 please do. She is a spoiled brat, and she has always made me feel like I'm not good enough. DH also hold some resentment towards her because their parents favor his sister and brother over him all the time. (SIL and BIL both for cars as grad gifts he was told that they were happy he graduated. :/)
He tells me that we will see his family even less when we have kids as he doesn't want to spend time protecting our kids from them.
estrellita Ahh, I see. Well I really, really hope a better and cheaper apartment comes super quick for you both! I will be sending lots of good thoughts your way! Money issues are the worst! I know we aren't MM here, but if you ever wanted to post your budget we could all maybe try and help cut other things or help to see if we could in a sense disperse the $$$ a different way to try and save more money. Just as a suggestion though. I'm sure you've already thought of everything having to deal with this. I really wish it was easier! (((hugs)))
awick14 That's EXACTLY how my H's family is too. He gets the shaft with everything! My In-laws definitely favor all the other kids over him. It was like that all growing up too. I always feel so bad for him. I try to *spoil* him for Christmas and birthdays to make up for the shitty childhood he had!