As PPs said, counseling is a good place to start at least processing this.... information... and all the emotions that go along with it. I'd at least start (vigorous) individual and couples' counseling. I'd also find someone you trust IRL to confide in, in due time.
As PPs said, counseling is a good place to start at least processing this.... information... and all the emotions that go along with it. I'd at least start (vigorous) individual and couples' counseling. I'd also find someone you trust IRL to confide in, in due time.
H has been in counseling for a few weeks. He said it was for depression but I now know it was for his guilt. I have an appointment tomorrow day to talk to a counselor also. I'm not sure I am ready for couples counseling yet but we will see what the counselor recommends.
Thanks again for all the support from everyone. It's been a roller coaster of emotions for the past 2 days. I never knew a person could feel so many different emotions in such a short period of time.
I try to be nonjudgmental in these situations irl because I don't want anyone to feel weird around me if they decide to stay, but fuck him for choosing to have sex with some random bitch instead of his wife for months. I'm angry for you.
I try to be nonjudgmental in these situations irl because I don't want anyone to feel weird around me if they decide to stay, but fuck him for choosing to have sex with some random bitch instead of his wife for months. I'm angry for you.
Trust me I have had those same thoughts and said it to him. I always said I would leave but having kids makes it more difficult and makes me hesitate a little. I'm still not sure what I want to do. I do know he wil be sleeping on the couch for a while.
You have a PM! I agree with all the PP's that counseling is a great place to start. Individual & marriage even if you think you can't handle it right now. You are going to go through so many emotions. You will loath yourself, loath your husband, be angry, depressed, shocked & so many I can't think of right now. You may question your entire family life with your DH, was it a total lie, is he really only here with me still because of the children? Don't feel bad about your kids watching too much tv. I can confess that DD is still watching way too many hours of Kids You Tube. I truly mean way way too much. I know it but my mind is so all over the place that I really can't focus. I have started anxiety medication & am hoping that will help with my crazy obsessive thoughts. Sometimes we have to do what's best for us to make things better in the long run for our kids. It's not like you getting drunk all day & they're running the streets they are watching TV. You've had a life changing event shit on you & you're trying to survive & I'm sure act normal for you kids sake.
Look hard at your finances, make copies of bank records, retirement accounts, savings, pay stubs, mortgages, loans, insurance and credit card statements. I don't mean to alarm you, but it's important.
I agree. I would also put some money into an account that only you can access.
I don't know what I'd do, having not been in your shoes. I think I might be willing to try counseling, individually (both of you) and together, but truth be told, I don't know what it would take for me to forgive an affair and move on.
"Hello babies. Welcome to Earth. It's hot in the summer and cold in the winter. It's round and wet and crowded. On the outside, babies, you've got a hundred years here. There's only one rule that I know of, babies-"God damn it, you've got to be kind.”
You have a PM! I agree with all the PP's that counseling is a great place to start. Individual & marriage even if you think you can't handle it right now. You are going to go through so many emotions. You will loath yourself, loath your husband, be angry, depressed, shocked & so many I can't think of right now. You may question your entire family life with your DH, was it a total lie, is he really only here with me still because of the children? Don't feel bad about your kids watching too much tv. I can confess that DD is still watching way too many hours of Kids You Tube. I truly mean way way too much. I know it but my mind is so all over the place that I really can't focus. I have started anxiety medication & am hoping that will help with my crazy obsessive thoughts. Sometimes we have to do what's best for us to make things better in the long run for our kids. It's not like you getting drunk all day & they're running the streets they are watching TV. You've had a life changing event shit on you & you're trying to survive & I'm sure act normal for you kids sake.
I'm not a poster here but have been in your situation. I've found this site extremely helpful and what I needed during the early stages after D-Day (discovery day) as they call it. Take your time to figure out what you want and do what feels best for you.
I'm not a poster here but have been in your situation. I've found this site extremely helpful and what I needed during the early stages after D-Day (discovery day) as they call it. Take your time to figure out what you want and do what feels best for you.
I'm not a poster here but have been in your situation. I've found this site extremely helpful and what I needed during the early stages after D-Day (discovery day) as they call it. Take your time to figure out what you want and do what feels best for you.