Stupid anxiety making me worry

[Jalapeñomel]

You can spend your whole life worry about things that are out of your control, or you can do what the rest of us do, and pop a Xanax.

[VillainV]

I also worry about infertility. After spending my entire adult life AVOIDING pregnancy, wouldn't it be a b*tch to find out that I can't have kids now that I want to?

I realize that this is an irrational fear for me (at least at this point), and so far we have ABSOLUTELY no reason to worry about anything....but still....the heartbreak of infertility (or miscarriage, or a sick baby) is very daunting.

[winecheery]

Aug 19, 2012 8:18:57 GMT -5 namasteak said:

1)that when I go to get Mirena remove my doctor will tell me that I don't have it and the reason I haven't gotten pregnant (in the 4years no condom sex) is bc I am infertile.

Sigh.

I have this one in the back of my head, because I'm crazy. Well, not so much that I'm infertile but that there will be "vague issues". I was on BCP tho, but same type of fear for the same reason.

But you know what? I reallllllly don't truly believe this. At all. Bodies are mysterious, hormones are even more mysterious, and why waste time worrying until you have to?

Besides, the point of BC in any form is to stop you from ovulating and make your body think it's pg so you don't really get pg, so when it's working effectively, that's why all that condomless sex didn't result in babies. But you know that deep down.

Therefore, just try to enjoy the ride! You'll have real reasons to worry if you start stressing yourself out over unfounded worry this soon: GRAY HAIR & WRINKLES! lol

[mimosas]

I have these thoughts all the time. I always thought I would get pg right away (I guess everyone does) and now that it's been several months of perfect timing and we're not, I'm kind of freaking out.

[imoan]

It's always interesting to me how so many people nowadays go into ttc just assume they're going to have issues with no reason to think that. I've heard this fear from almost all my friends when they started ttcing. I wonder what causes it lately.

[jenn1298]

I have all of the same worries. Luckily, I have gotten pregnant before so I get some comfort in knowing that I should be able to do it again. Last time we got pregnant pretty quickly, after about 4 months of no BCP, and it was our first month with perfect timing, but this time around I haven't even ovulated the last two cycles so that just makes the worrying worse.

Regarding your worry about having a miscarriage...don't worry about it. It will happen whether you worry or not and it will be out of your control. I didn't let myself really read anything about m/c while I was pregnant, because I knew that I would freak out if I did. Instead I just focused on being healthy and doing what I needed to do. Unfortunately in my case I ended up having a m/c (and then I read about them obsessively for a while), but being worried about them in advance would have done me no good and I might have wondered if the extra worry/stress contributed to it. This seems like a long response, but for me the m/c was bad enough - I am glad that I didn't have several weeks of worrying about it in advance.

[VillainV]

Aug 19, 2012 20:47:30 GMT -5 imoan said:

It's always interesting to me how so many people nowadays go into ttc just assume they're going to have issues with no reason to think that. I've heard this fear from almost all my friends when they started ttcing. I wonder what causes it lately.

I think for me it's because I've waited till later in life. I mean, I'm 31 and healthy, so I don't expect to have too much trouble. But I know I'm not as fertile as I was when I was 25...so I am prepared for it to take a little longer, I guess.

I also think that for me, as well as for a lot of us who have waited this long, we kind of feel like now that we're ready we are just really impatient for it to happen already! Especially for people who have waited till a "good time" to have kids.....and this might induce a little bit of anxiety too.

[btay]

Aug 19, 2012 20:47:30 GMT -5 imoan said:

It's always interesting to me how so many people nowadays go into ttc just assume they're going to have issues with no reason to think that. I've heard this fear from almost all my friends when they started ttcing. I wonder what causes it lately.

I think part of it is because infertility is getting more attention in the media, with so many celebrities admitting to needing treatment.

[imoan]

I'm 31 too

[statlerwaldorf]

I can say that I knew I was IF long before we started TTC. I don't ovulate on my own and I never have. I would go years without a period. We started TTC right after we got married since we knew we'd have trouble. I was IF even in my late teens and early 20s.

[imoan]

Aug 20, 2012 23:00:13 GMT -5 statlerwaldorf said:

I can say that I knew I was IF long before we started TTC. I don't ovulate on my own and I never have. I would go years without a period. We started TTC right after we got married since we knew we'd have trouble. I was IF even in my late teens and early 20s.

I'm not talking about you. You had a reason to believe that. I'm talking about the perfectly healthy people who have perfect cycles and have no reason to believe otherwise. Like my coworker who is already talking about having to have someone potentially carry her kid one day... all because ONE of her (many) aunts has endo. And when you try to tell her that 1) endo doesn't automatically mean IF and 2) that your one aunt having it doesn't mean you have it (and no, she hasn't been diagnosed with it--- she just apparently thinks her drs are morons and that she knows better).... she looks at you like YOU'RE the crazy one. Oh, and another reason she thinks she'll be IF... her mom is SUPER fertile (this girl has a crapload of siblings). And her sister LOOKS like her mom. So obviously she'll get all the fertility. She looks like her dad, and that ONE aunt with endo is on that side, so....

And then imoan's head explodes.

[statlerwaldorf]

Aug 21, 2012 8:46:57 GMT -5 imoan said:

Aug 20, 2012 23:00:13 GMT -5 statlerwaldorf said:

I can say that I knew I was IF long before we started TTC. I don't ovulate on my own and I never have. I would go years without a period. We started TTC right after we got married since we knew we'd have trouble. I was IF even in my late teens and early 20s.

I'm not talking about you. You had a reason to believe that. I'm talking about the perfectly healthy people who have perfect cycles and have no reason to believe otherwise. Like my coworker who is already talking about having to have someone potentially carry her kid one day... all because ONE of her (many) aunts has endo. And when you try to tell her that 1) endo doesn't automatically mean IF and 2) that your one aunt having it doesn't mean you have it (and no, she hasn't been diagnosed with it--- she just apparently thinks her drs are morons and that she knows better).... she looks at you like YOU'RE the crazy one. Oh, and another reason she thinks she'll be IF... her mom is SUPER fertile (this girl has a crapload of siblings). And her sister LOOKS like her mom. So obviously she'll get all the fertility. She looks like her dad, and that ONE aunt with endo is on that side, so....

And then imoan's head explodes.

People are insane. I think part of it is that we drill into teenagers heads that you can get pregnant at any time and it's that easy. Then when they are adults and don't get pregnant in the first month or two they freak out. But then again I know people that have freaked out about IF before even TTC.

[Jalapeñomel]

I think it´s because IF can be devastating, and if you prep yourself for it, somehow it will make it easier (or something).