Toddler Not Listening & Following Directions in Daycare`

[lovethesun]

Newbie here! I am glad to have found this board and hope to get some help with my newly turned 4 year old! 

DS attends daycare and has since he was 3 months old. Recently we have been having issues with him at home and at school not listening or following directions. He has tons of energy and I am sure that doesn't help with these issues. I am at my wits end!

We get a daily report from the teacher and some days he has a great day. Other days, like today, he had trouble using his listening ears and following directions. 

Help!!!! I am just about crazy and so is my husband!!!

Any ideas or websites, books, etc I should be researching?

[NandaB]

Welcome! Honestly, if the worst thing your 4 yr old does is not listen sometimes I think he's doing pretty good, lol. Mine regularly yells at me for things like picking up the thing he dropped or pouring his sisters milk first.

If they seem genuinely concerned, or have expressed that they are having a hard time managing him I would ask about their schedule (does he get to go outside and run around?) healthy snacks? Resting time.... Because from the little you just shared he sounds like a 4 yr old. My advice is drink.

[momin2013]

Sorry, I don't have much advice as we're not there yet with DS, but just wanted to say hi and welcome!

It really does sound like fairly normal 4-year old behaviour to me too, though. Maybe try to see if there's any pattern, like is he maybe tired those days, or something else?

Does his teacher maybe have some ideas or strategies that you can also work on at home together? I imagine they should have a lot of experience with kids at this age.

[Deleted]

What they said and welcome!

[mamaalysson]

Nanda's advice is spot on...bottoms up! :-). But really, kids seem to have an amazing ability to only hear the words they want to hear. And also, they're kind of jerks sometimes. My five-year-old just threw me all kinds of shade because I brought an orange bag of chewy bunnies to camp pick up...apparently that was unacceptable and she now only like the purple bags.

And welcome!

[rosesandpetals]

It kind of depends... Is he not listening as in he doesn't sit for circle time when they ask him to? Sounds like a 4 yo. But if "not listening" is their polite way of saying "we can't control him, he runs into the parking lot at recess and colors all over the wall during lunch", then that's different. I'd ask specifically what he's having trouble with at school. At the end of the summer, a 4 yo is probably transitioning to a new classroom, too, for preschool. Maybe he's having trouble with the changes.

Anyway, welcome!

[Kcthepouchh8r]

Welcome!

4 year olds in general are kind of these feral little creatures. So. much. defiance. I would ask more specifics about what he is struggling with. Also discussing your expectations for his behavior prior to transitioning to any new setting can be a helpful strategy.