Tell me happy things about having your second newborn

[bowies]

Happy things about the first: parking my ass on the couch and binging on Netflix. Baby smell.

[gibbinator]

D2 was sooooooo easy. Slept all the time, just say in his swing or bouncy chair when awake, nursing was a 10 mins every 2hrs affair. Night and day from my experience with ds1. We kept ds1 in daycare so my days were a breeze. My expectations were so low going into the 2nd mat leave do I was blown away with all the time on my hands.

Now that ds2 is almost a year old, the boys play (and rough house) well together. They'll spend 45 mine chasing each other around the living areas on hands and knees. Ds1 adores his "baby monster"

Eta : ds2 barely ever even blew out diapers. Like everything about this guy as a newborn was magical. I wish you the same!

[scribellesam]

Sitting on the couch while they sleep all snuggled up on your chest. I love that part.

Dealing with the day to day newborn stuff (constant feed, change, put to sleep, etc.) is so much less overwhelming because you've done it before.

[thebreakfastclub]

I could tell you how easy my newborn was! I had three hour stretches while he would nap in his crib. There wasn't much to do most days. I reorganized my closets to keep busy.

[Brie]

I felt zero guilt about having people help this time. Sure, make dinner! Can you mow the lawn? Will you hold the baby while I take a nap? Go entertain my toddler please!

Seeing the boys together is also great, although C didn't really GAF until P got more interesting recently.

I also watched a lot of TV and took a lot of naps.

[badgergrl]

Bfing was A lot less painful the 2nd time. No real soreness and no bleeding second time around

I put my toddler in daycare and planted my ass on a couch a nursed and snuggled and binge watched tv. It was actually great. And my second kid was a good sleeper so I wasn't even that tired.

[Willis Jackson]

OMG, it's so much better.

My first was colicky and my 2nd was average but it felt like a breeze. You'll appreciate all the things you can do with a newborn that you can't with a toddler around- like eat junk food and watch TV.

[rootbeerfloat]

DD was a lot easier, and not so much because she was objectively easier (they were fairly equal in terms of temperament and fussiness), but because I was a more confident parent. I could tolerate the crying better, I knew what soothing strategies to try, I knew it wasn't the worst thing in the world to take a break, etc. I know not everyone is a newborn-person, but honestly, I preferred lounging on the couch and popping my boob out periodically to having to constantly entertain a 3 year-old.

And eventually stuff like this happens:

[water*drop]

My second is a magical unicorn baby, especially after my first. Even though the pediatrician said that DS's sleep is still worse than she'd like, it's a million times better than DD's sleep was. DS is super happy and smiley. I'm pretty sure his fussiest day so far was on par with DD's easiest day as a baby.

The hard times are also made easier by the BTDT thing. I'm on the MSPI diet again, but it's NBD. When DS has a fussy day, I feel more equipped to handle it. I don't stress over stuff as much because I know it really will get better eventually.

[turtlegirl]

I didn't feel guilty about "not getting g anything done" on maternity leave and took full advantage of just nursing and laying on the couch binging Netflix any opportunity I could (I had a decent amount of help, but DS1 wasn't in full time daycare or anything since grandparents usually watch him).

The first smiles are just as awesome and the sibling relationship is pretty amazing.

But overall, I'm not a big newborn person in general, even after having 2 and having #3 very soon. I'm much more of a 6 month + baby person. It's hard to fake a smile when people have been asking my lately if I'm getting excited about another baby. And if I'm honest and say, "not really, but I'm looking forward to having another 6 month old and older child" then people give me funny looks and don't really know what to say, lol.

[loskadoodle]

Tiny baby snuggles are the best!

[Willis Jackson]

Aug 6, 2015 16:44:17 GMT -5 turtlegirl said:

The first smiles are just as awesome and the sibling relationship is pretty amazing.

This is true, too. The big kids will be like, "Mommy? Mommy?" and I'm all, "Shut up I'm trying to get the baby to say Mama." lol.

Not really but you know. It's also nice that the baby has a cheering section every time he does anything new.

[Deleted]

Whispy baby hair and squishy newborn cheeks are two of my favorite things

Plus you'll be more prepared this time. If she is colicky, you will know what to do because you've done it before. You know that it will end and fairly soon. You'll get through it. But hopefully you won't have to worry about that and you'll a magical unicorn baby who is sleepy and content

[Deleted]

The girls were colicky, sleepy babies that were so hard to get to latch. It was hell some days. BUT, watching J with them made it all worth it. Trust me, when you see that sibling relationship you will feel it's all worth it

Eta: I cannot stress enough how much easier it is the second time becuse you "know what you are doing" you are confident that you won't kill your kid and do what you know works for you and your family. This was invaluable for us. The first time we were worried about getting it right etc. The second time, we knew what worked and went with it until it didn't work anymore.

[thebreakfastclub]

I don't remember my uterus contracting. Hmm

[glitzy07]

Shit. What if my first was the unicorn baby (minus bottle refusal)? I'm so screwed this time, huh?

[Deleted]

It was really not that bad - physically, I feel like I recovered faster (despite a worse tear). Breastfeeding was easier and my milk came in super fast. I had a much more "we can do it!" attitude and was more chill than round 1.

A month with DH home is what I had - it was lovely. It was honestly a bit of a vacation, even if somewhat exhausted.

[chw57]

I feel like literally everything has been better the second time around. DS is a really easy baby, but not having all the first time mom anxiety is so nice, and it's adorable how much DD absolutely loves him

[deo]

I think it is easier with the second because the crying doesn't scare you as much as with your first. It's not like "OMG why is my baby crying?!?", it's more like "ok, the baby is crying, kid #1 cried and we survived, he probably just needs to eat or sleep".

[tulips]

I was much less anxious the second time around and I let myself be lazy and enjoy just sitting around on maternity leave a little bit more than the first time.

My postpartum recovery was better the second time. I was much less swollen and bled for a shorter amount of time.

K was a much better sleeper right off the bat than her brother was and I think that helped the transition to two children a lot. Breast-feeding also was much easier at first with her because she didn't have a tongue-tie like he did. She latched right on and hasn't looked back!

X went to daycare pretty much full-time while I was on maternity leave so I got to relax and get all the baby snuggles I could.

Baby snuggles and newborn baby smell are awesome. I enjoyed being stuck in a chair with them napping on me and watching crap TV.

Watching the sibling relationship develop is pretty awesome.

I was also much more assertive with guests this time around. I still tried to do a lot of entertaining and people pleasing after X was born and the second time around I gave people more direction on how they could help me.

[cinco]

The healing process went so much better for me the second time around. I had some uterus contracting, but not as much (oddly I had none with my 3rd). Breastfeeding came naturally vs. the struggle it was the first time. Kids 2 and 3 were also frequent wakers, but my body was used to it and I dealt with being tired better. DS's crying didn't make me feel tense like it did with my first. Seeing DD1 with him was amazing and we had a much better experience overall. The third was a breeze (minus the lack of sleep). She is the one that ended up being the most difficult as a toddler/preschooler though, which is good b/c it makes us never second guess DH's vasectomy.

[namasteak]

Thanks for posting this, I need to hear these things too.

[mlt]

Having a second was so much more fun. I enjoyed the snuggles instead of obsessing and worrying about everything. Even when he was fussy I had the perspective and experience to know it would pass and there was nothing to do but hold him and get through it. It was by far a happier and more relaxing experience.

[curbsideprophet]

BF was so much easier. DS slept better then DD ever did in the early days.

I was not looking forward to having a another newborn. I enjoyed it so much more the second time. I was sad when my ML was over.

[sporklemotion]

Ditto @mrsbecky-- just knowing that it will end helps, and I can actually enjoy some of the couch time and snuggles that I didn't last time.

This may be flammable, but I am less anxious when DD2 cries-- DD1's crying felt like knives through my heart, but with DD2, I know it's OK if she cries for a bit before I get to her. So I don't worry as much about putting her down to pee or shower, and I feel less trapped or guilty about doing things for me. Sorry DD2-- bootstraps. (Note: I don't neglect her for hours, so please don't call CPS.)

BFing has been easier. My milk came in faster and I knew what I was doing more, so I was less sore due to bad latches that I didn't correct right away. I know this isn't true for everyone, but I was told that's our supply is often better with later children.

[mcfelix]

This is a great thread - thanks to everyone who has responded. I'm really looking forward to having another baby soon. I think I'll enjoy it more knowing what an awesome little person she'll be as she grows. DS is 2 and we have so much fun with him - and knowing that it's the future will make it easier to get through the crappiness.

[anaps28]

My 2nd is so good I would consider having a 3rd but then I think it would be impossible to have another one this good.
The first few weeks I had a hard time transitioning from 3yr old mode back to newborn mode but DS2 was SO good I quickly snapped out of it.
DS1 was a REALLY difficult baby. And now he's a pain in the ass 4 yr old. Sigh

[jsillyfun]

Newborn number two has been WAY easier than the first. She almost sttn from day one (one short wake up), naps a ton, rarely cries, and loves to cuddle. And is not dairy sensitive. She does want to be held and nursed all day though. Two kids is pretty hard though...

Oh and the recovery and nipple pain was like nothing this time.

[lindsaymg]

Mom of a 2nd child 6 day old here. I am not stressed at all with this one. I am not stressed about breastfeeding, I don't feel nervous around her. I know I have this down. I know what to expect and I am at ease. I also know with absolute finality that this is our last so I need to slow it down and enjoy this tiny baby time.

That being said DS is 6.5 and I have a lot of help with him. It is the summer so our schedules are relaxed and he is in day camp, and my parents are keeping him for a few days because they have my nephew in town.

[Deleted]

I will say I had a full on panic attack when I brought DD2 home from the hospital, I absolutely lost my mind and lay in bed literally contemplating if it would be possible to put myself into a coma for 6 months so I could wake up when DD2 was no longer a newborn. But that was one night of raging hormones and the reality was I loved her newborn phase. (I HATED it with DD1... she was not colicky but she was insanely fussy, never napped, poor night sleeper, and I had nightmarish PPD, pervasive thoughts of hurting the baby, etc.).

Anyway with DD2...

My contractions hurt way less. Labor was a piece of cake and then I got the epidural because I didn't want to wait for it to get bad. lol.

Breastfeeding was a piece of cake.

I knew what the fuck I was doing with a baby.

The sibling relationship is one of life's greatest joys to witness (until they get old enough to fight, anyway).

Newborns don't talk back to you or sass you or give you hell about going in their car seats or try to run away from you in a parking lot or ask you to pretend you are Sleeping fucking Beauty for the 29859437539046th time today.

It is nice to be your baby's whole entire world. I love having independent kids but oh man, that feeling of the baby just curling up on your chest and falling asleep and sighing every couple of minutes. Bliss.

I read 80 books the year DD2 was born because I was sitting around nursing so much. I was like yeah I'm up at 3 AM, but LOOK AT HOW WELL READ AND PRODUCTIVE I AM!

Basically I ran out of fucks to give after DD1 so I was on cruise control the whole time with DD2. It was great.

In conclusion, the second newborn was amazing and please don't ask me to talk about what happens when your wonderful second baby becomes a toddler.