Should I go to this wedding?

[Deleted]

Or, would you?

My uncle is getting married on Oct 13 in Chicago area. I live in Iowa.

My sister is getting married on Sept 15 in Chicago area, I'm MOH.

My friend is getting married on October 6 in Michigan, I'm a bridesmaid.

That's 3 out of town weddings within 1 calendar month (5 weekends).

I'm obviously not skipping either wedding that I'm standing in, so the obvious choice is to miss my uncle's wedding. My dad has 9 siblings, he's one of them. He was having money trouble around the time I got married, so he and his FI did not attend my wedding (it was OOT for them). I'm not close with them or anything.

Sounds obvious except - I'm close with my family in general and that side of the family doesn't get together often at all - last time I saw most of them was my grandmother's funeral last December. They will all be at my sister's wedding, but it would be nice to see them again and at an event where I'm not separated from the group most of the night (since I won't be hanging around extended family at my sister's wedding until after dinner). I have no idea when I'll see that side of the family again - we'll see a few at Christmas but they get together infrequently and I can attend even less frequently since I'm out of state.

I can afford to go (I'd basically just cover my gas and stay with my parents, likely be credited on their gift, etc), I'm sure I'd have fun, but I can't decide if I really want to go OOT for a third weekend in a month. WWYD?

[Deleted]

I would go. I always make an effort to travel to weddings for people who are important to me, regardless of whether they attended my wedding.

ETA: I wouldn't travel, if you don't feel like it, just to visit family. Go if you want to see your uncle get married. It's not like a birthday that happens every year.

[Becca]

It sounds to me like you know it will be exhausting, but kind of want to go. Your uncle's is the last wedding, so it isn't like you are burning yourself out for a wedding you are in the following weekend. I would probably go.

[chessie]

Def go to the ones your in, the uncles I would not go. You can't do them all. I can imagine being in 2 in a short amount of time is already costing you a fortune.

[dexteroni]

I say go for the family reunion aspect. Even though it's going to be a pain to go out of town that much, it's only three times, and you'll enjoy seeing your family. Then you have a few weeks to recuperate before the holiday season begins.

[Deleted]

I don't know how long it would take you to get from Iowa to Chicago but if it wasn't an awful drive and I could afford it I would definately go.

[Deleted]

Aug 20, 2012 19:21:21 GMT -5 @kjewell said:

I don't know how long it would take you to get from Iowa to Chicago but if it wasn't an awful drive and I could afford it I would definately go.

Good point - it is 3.5-4 hours to my parents' house depending on traffic. So not horribly far. The drive to my friend's house in Michigan is probably around 9 hours and I'll be driving both ways the weekend before, if that makes any difference.

Minor detail that doesn't necessarily matter -DH can't go with me to either wedding. His friend is getting married the same weekend as my friend and he has to work the weekend of my uncle's wedding - so I'll be traveling alone both times. No big deal but a bit exhausting (and boring, lol)

[Deleted]

you have mentioned a few times how little you get to see your family and how much you miss them. if you only have to pay for gas, I don't understand why you would not go.

[Deleted]

Aug 20, 2012 19:25:46 GMT -5 tacom said:

you have mentioned a few times how little you get to see your family and how much you miss them. if you only have to pay for gas, I don't understand why you would not go.

If it wasn't for this point, I'd definitely NOT go I do miss my family and want to see them. I'm just not huge on being out of town and traveling constantly, especially when it means lots of driving. I'll miss my DH and my dogs, and I can't get anything done during the week with work so if I don't have the weekend, it is hard to run errands, maintain the house, etc.

But the chance to see everyone again at the wedding is what is making me lean toward going but with hesitation.

[dexteroni]

Aug 20, 2012 19:29:17 GMT -5 @buckybells said:

I'm just not huge on being out of town and traveling constantly, especially when it means lots of driving. I'll miss my DH and my dogs, and I can't get anything done during the week with work so if I don't have the weekend, it is hard to run errands, maintain the house, etc.

You're not going every weekend for a year. It's three weekends, each for a singular event. The pros of going outweigh the cons IMO, and if you go, I think you'll be glad you did.

[Deleted]

Aug 20, 2012 19:35:02 GMT -5 dexteroni said:

Aug 20, 2012 19:29:17 GMT -5 @buckybells said:

I'm just not huge on being out of town and traveling constantly, especially when it means lots of driving. I'll miss my DH and my dogs, and I can't get anything done during the week with work so if I don't have the weekend, it is hard to run errands, maintain the house, etc.

You're not going every weekend for a year. It's three weekends, each for a singular event. The pros of going outweigh the cons IMO, and if you go, I think you'll be glad you did.

Sometimes it feels like it! I've been out of town 5 weekends and had out of town guests 3 weekends since Memorial day :-( I'm definitely a homebody so this stresses me out probably more than it should.

But you're right, it is probably not a big deal and I probably will be glad if I go!

[kellbell191]

I would go. It will be fun!

[drloretta]

I'd go just to see family

Withe the weekend schedule we had this summer, I can understand wanting a break, but I'd suck it up for family

[GailGoldie]

i would go. it's always nice to see family at weddings... trust me - once the weddings are done, often you only see family at funerals... don't skip any weddings when you like your family and can have fun with them.

[Deleted]

I would go. But I'm big on families and I love weddings.

[countthestars]

I would go, but we often drive 3 hours to see family for an afternoon, so 4 hours seems like nothing to me.

[HitchedIn2006]

Is there any way you could take the Megabus one weekend? (Not sure how far your parents live from the metra... but could allow you one weekend to read and such to/from.)

[Deleted]

Aug 20, 2012 20:58:31 GMT -5 HitchedIn2006 said:

Is there any way you could take the Megabus one weekend? (Not sure how far your parents live from the metra... but could allow you one weekend to read and such to/from.)

I'm taking it into the city for my sister's wedding, but my parents live out in the far suburbs where it wouldn't make sense for the uncle wedding.

Also, I had a horrible experience last week with Megabus and I'm not sure I'll ever be taking it again after my sister's wedding. In short, it was 2 hours 40 minutes late picking us up in Chicago, in the rain, and offered no explanation or apology when it finally showed up (and no information in the meantime so we stood outside in the rain the whole time).

Anyway, that was a good idea nonetheless.

I think you have all convinced me I should go. I will have fun and I love weddings and family too! I need to just suck it up and take a break from travel after the weddings are over.

[MadamePresident]

Go, but schedule NOTHING for the weekends in between and maybe a couple after. Its a lot of traveling.

[ECB]

I'd go and I'd just make sure the next few weekends after it are free and open and I can "make up" on my down time.

DH's family is huge and all over the country. They too use stuff like weddings to kind of be a reunion. Funerals - not so much (because it's often cost prohibative for more distant relatives to fly across country at the last minute).

The last wedding that was a "family reunion" was ours - 10 years ago! There had been a big crop of weddings for many years, bu tthen everyone got married.

Just 2 weeks ago, a new kind of reunion trend started - the Bar/Bat Mitzvah's. It was GREAT to reconnect and I'm looking forward to the next one now.

My point- the excuses to have family get togethers DO sometimes run out. Take advantage of them when you can.;

[takeonyou]

Go. I am dying for a wedding. I would.love to go to three.

[mrssavy42112]

Since you can that you can afford it, then go. The only reason I wouldn't go is for finances.

[dragonfly08]

I'd ask myself...if the dates weren't so close together, would I want to be at each of these events? If the answer was yes (assuming finances weren't an issue, which they don't seem to be), then I'd go. Yeah, it's tiring that they do happen to be one after another in that short period of time, but I'd hate to skip it only because of that and then regret it afterward when you realize you could have gone and you'd be done and home now.

[HoneySpider]

I would go.