Is this weird, or is it just me?

[drloretta]

I'll try not to let this get too long.

DH is part of a large international organization for his main hobby. A lot of the folks in the organization don't have a lot of $, and are also generous to a fault, so there's a lot of carpooling, sharing items, offering housing during events to cut down on hotel costs, etc. We've hosted a houseful of guys on the way to an event with DH.

We just moved to a new area last year, so DH is trying to establish himself with a new group within the organization. Last night he was talking with a (female) acquaintance about an upcoming event. She can't afford to go to it solo, so DH offered to drive her. He then also offered to share a hotel room with her to cut costs. She told him to ask his wife.

When he brought it up last night, I told him I thought it was weird. I don't imagine that anything untoward would happen, but I just can't imagine 2 members of the opposite sex (who barely know each other) sharing a hotel room for a weekend.

DH was genuinely surprised I felt this way. But said his acquaintance guessed that I wouldn't be cool with it.

So, would you have been OK with it? Am I being weird?

[takeonyou]

I would not be ok with it. Its weird.

[aspentosh]

There are only a handful of women I'd be ok with DH sharing a room with... that is not one of them.

PS- I think it's weird that he offered to share a room. Again, not because something would happen, but just because it's a woman and he barely knows her.

[benitabutrell]

Team weird.

[fuddyduddy]

It's weird.

[whitemerlot]

Weird.

[anna7602]

I think it's weird for someone he doesn't know well at all. DH went camping/hiking last year with a woman he has known since Kindergarten (and whom I know very well, also). And I traveled internationally with a good male friend and his father (with DD) a couple of years ago.

So it's not like I automatically think "opposite sex= something untoward going on." I just don't think I would be fine with it if it was someone DH only knew casually.

[bunnysmom]

I'd give the acquaintance the benefit of the doubt because she told him to ask you, but I wouldn't be comfortable with this and I find it weird that your H and this person are.

[shell403b]

Weird.

[barefootcontessa]

It is weird and surprising your husband would expect you to be okay with it.

[80sjunkie]

We used to share rooms like that in grad school for conferences, but we were all close and most of us were married. Spouses were also friends with these people. Weird to share a room with essentially a stranger.

[drloretta]

The acquaintance didn't think I'd be OK with it. DH apparently didn't know either way. I think in his mind, the fact that he doesn't know her all that well would make it less weird. To be fair, he's one of those "generous to a fault" people, so I think he just figured he was helping someone out.

In any case, he's telling her I'm not OK with it, he was surprised but fine with my decision, and the gal won't be able to go now. Oh well.

[ECB]

Definitely weird. I wouldn't be o.k. w/ this at all. There is a lot I can roll with when it comes to male/female friendships - but this isn't one of them.

Heck, how many people have we seen on these boards complain about having to share a hotel room w/ a coworker (who they probably know better than your DH knows this woman) of the same sex?

It's just too close for comfort.

I think your DH's heart is in the right place and his head is SO above board on this. But the reality just isn't cool.

[smiley]

I think it would be strange to share a room with a women you barely knew. If it was something DH and I had been friends with for a long time then I may be on board with it.

[crazygame]

Your husband sounds sweet and innocent. That being said, I would not be comfortable with this.

[Awkward]

Definitely weird, but I'm not sure if I was in that situation that I'd say no.

Now I'm curious what this "hobby" is.

[birdmom]

Weird.

[drloretta]

Aug 21, 2012 8:11:27 GMT -5 Awkward said:

Now I'm curious what this "hobby" is.

The easiest way to explain it is medieval battlefield re-enactments. Sorta. DH and this gal are both fencers. He also does full-on armored combat with rattan sticks. Here he is with DD:

[ladybrettashley]

Definitely weird. Actually if I were that woman, I would be pretty creeped out that a guy I barely knew offered to share a hotel room.

[CloudBee]

I wouldn't want my husband sharing a room with even a man he had never met.

Share a room with a woman? I wouldn't want him to share a hotel room with my sister unless there were some sort of emergency.

[Awkward]

Aug 21, 2012 8:17:44 GMT -5 drloretta said:

Aug 21, 2012 8:11:27 GMT -5 Awkward said:

Now I'm curious what this "hobby" is.

The easiest way to explain it is medieval battlefield re-enactments. Sorta. DH and this gal are both fencers. He also does full-on armored combat with rattan sticks.

OH! Ok. I had some friends in college that did that kind of thing, they had the COOLEST wedding.

[greekypie]

Aug 21, 2012 7:48:21 GMT -5 takeonyou said:

I would not be ok with it. Its weird.

OMG yes. This is not ok.

[Deleted]

I don't even like to share a room with other female CW's, so this would be weird to me. What would happen if the only room the hotel had left was a single king size bed and not 2 doubles? I wouldn't take that chance.

[Deleted]

That is really odd.

[Deleted]

Aug 21, 2012 7:48:21 GMT -5 takeonyou said:

I would not be ok with it. Its weird.

Yup.

[Deleted]

Aug 21, 2012 7:53:12 GMT -5 bunnysmom said:

I'd give the acquaintance the benefit of the doubt because she told him to ask you, but I wouldn't be comfortable with this and I find it weird that your H and this person are.

I'm thinking she said "ask your wife" because SHE'S not comfortable with sharing a room with a man she barely knows but didn't want to say that to him.

[Deleted]

Wierd. My Dad once shared a room with a female coworker at a conference. Her room reservation was deleted, & she was the only woman attending the conference. She had been a friend of my parents for years, & the only thing that happened was she learned my father was colorblind when she saw the labels my mother had pinned to all his clothes.

[h]

I think it is very, very weird. And I would find it kind of weird for two people of the same sex who barely know each other to share a hotel room, too.

[ermahgerd]

Definitely weird.

[pamela]

Nope, not okay.