Biting chapter 567. Am I being that Mom?

[Deleted]

I've mentioned before that over the past two months,  DS2 (17 months)has become the class biter. After he bites x amount of times in a day, he is sent home. He was sent home for the third time today. I'm at a loss, and I'm thinking of switching daycares.  Obviously they can't watch just him all day long,  but he managed to bite 5 times by 11:00 am. I feel like at some point their supervision has to come in to question, right? Obviously, it's not their fault he bites, but I feel like they have to help me a little here. Telling work I have to leave because he is sick is one thing, but because he is the class mean kid is not the best feeling. Am I wrong and blaming daycare unfairly? Because I'm about to make the switch. 

[spk926]

I think I would need more information first. What's the adult to child ratio when this happens? What are the other children and adults doing when this happens? How do they redirect him? If you do switch him and he keeps biting, then what? I can't remember all you have shared on here but have you set up a meeting with the teacher and director to talk about this?

[redheadk]

Some kids are sneaky and fast biters but they should be able to tell you the exact circumstances surrounding most of his bites, such as if another child is playing with a toy he wants, etc. It's hard to address it if you don't know what to address! And, yes, they should be doing more, IMO.

[Deleted]

Yeah, information probably helps. Ratio is 8:2, they are all 12-24 months. They redirect and give a teether, but lately they do "timeout" in a high chair. They have a chart of what causes him to bite, but a lot of times it's "no reason". I don't know what else to do, when he doesn't bite much at home. The director basically says "well, hopefully he'll stop"

[cajunmom]

Kids can bite even while caregivers are directly watching them. They're fast. I have an in home daycare and I've been sitting on the floor with the kids right there with me and one will lean over and bite before I even realize what's happening. I couldn't have been paying any closer attention.

I guess what I'm saying is maybe you are blaming the daycare unfairly but that doesn't mean that there isn't things that they can do to help. I agree that there should be a meeting if there hasn't been one already.

[VillainV]

We have a biter. Day care documents every bite (we have to sign an incident report, and so do the parents of the kid who was bitten). They have NEVER threatened to send him home for this. We talk about it every time it happens, what we've noticed at home, what he does when he bites at day care, etc. Every time his caregivers and the director has kind of shrugged and said "Eh, it happens, it's normal at this age. We do our best to prevent bites, but other than what you're doing at home, it's not something you should be worried about while he's here with us."

So....I don't know, in your shoes, I would probably start looking for another day care.

[curbsideprophet]

Is this policy written down somewhere?

[Deleted]

Yes, it's in the handbook. I've never LOVED the daycare, but it's fine. We have a spot for him when he's two at DS1'S DC, but we had been holding off for other reasons. I assumed the policy was to appease the parents of those who are bitten. So frustrating.

@fivedogs thanks for the literature. I will definitely bring up some of the thoughts with the director.

[Ashley&Scott]

Sept 1, 2015 21:40:32 GMT -5 VillainV said:

We have a biter. Day care documents every bite (we have to sign an incident report, and so do the parents of the kid who was bitten). They have NEVER threatened to send him home for this. We talk about it every time it happens, what we've noticed at home, what he does when he bites at day care, etc. Every time his caregivers and the director has kind of shrugged and said "Eh, it happens, it's normal at this age. We do our best to prevent bites, but other than what you're doing at home, it's not something you should be worried about while he's here with us."

So....I don't know, in your shoes, I would probably start looking for another day care.

M was a biter too. His was teething related. They had permission to be him ibuprofen if needed (which they only did if he was showing signs of distress & discomfort). They made sure he had teethg toys & cold wash cloths to chew on, they shadowed him closely & talked About nice touches. Never a single mention of sending him home.