Getting over hating work...

[gogreengowhite]

While I was on maternity leave my boss told me he was quitting the week I got back. It was pretty much just him and me left as support staff. So, i am now hr, accounting, purchaser, payroll, etc. I'm the only one in the office on a daily basis.

I laid on the ground sobbing yesterday I'm so overwhelmed.

So, if you ever been to the point where the thought of work makes you cry (I'm looking at you angryharpy) what did/do you do to snap out of it once you're at home?

They are doing interviews this week to replace him, but I don't know if I'll make it. The fact my DH got a new job and we don't "need" my income is making my urge to run away from there more intense.

ETA: I cried at home, not work

[Deleted]

I worked at a job for 3 years that made my life miserable. Part of it was the work load and part of it was an awful boss.

I ended up leaving because I found a new job but looking back on the situation, I wished I had left work stuff at work (both physically and mentally). I constantly thought about work issues when I was at home and usually brought home stuff to do. It only added to my misery.

[preppy]

I felt this way for years. I finally put in my notice on Friday. We didn't need my income and I found something I love that is part time and a huge pay cut, it's only been three days and I already feel better. It's not worth it, especially if you don't need the income.

[thedash]

How to leave it at work? Drive home with the windows down, blasting your favorite CD. Come up with a ritual where you walk straight in the door and do something to unwind, like a shower or quick workout video. If loud isn't your style, get a meditation or classical music CD. On really bad days give yourself a treat like a small milkshake from the drive through on the way.

This will help keep you going for a few weeks but is obviously not a long term solution!

[mskitkat]

I left it at work by having a super understanding DH. Once I got home, he knew to let me go to the bedroom and just chill in silence alone. When I came out, I was ready to be human. I may also have drank more than was strictly healthy. Those were bad days.

[Deleted]

Aug 21, 2012 20:06:20 GMT -5 gogreengowhite said:

While I was on maternity leave my boss told me he was quitting the week I got back. It was pretty much just him and me left as support staff. So, i am now hr, accounting, purchaser, payroll, etc. I'm the only one in the office on a daily basis.

I laid on the ground sobbing yesterday I'm so overwhelmed.

So, if you ever been to the point where the thought of work makes you cry (I'm looking at you angryharpy) what did/do you do to snap out of it once you're at home?

They are doing interviews this week to replace him, but I don't know if I'll make it. The fact my DH got a new job and we don't "need" my income is making my urge to run away from there more intense.

ETA: I cried at home, not work

OMG, it sucks that this is what I'm known for.

Anyway, as for how to deal with it when I get home. I've struggled a bit the last week. I used to have a drink when I got home. But too often, one drink was turning into five, so I've cut down a lot.

Right now, I have small goals of daily exercise, reduced caffeine and alcohol, eating 2 vegetables and 1 fruit per day, making to-do lists, and a lot of positive self-talk. When possible, I try to make some time every day to read, hang out with friends, or just sit on my balcony and listen to Bob Uecker call the Brewers game. I recommend thinking about what would make you better and then making small, attainable goals. Also, let your friends and family know that you're struggling and need support. Having family and friends around to tell me that I am smart, that I am a good person, that it won't be like this forever has been SO helpful.

Also, Prozac and Lunesta.

Hang in there! (And it's OK to cry, especially at home. I've had to go cry in the bathroom stall before 10am on occasion!)

[thatgirl2478]

I've SO been there - except I've cried at work (on the empty end of the floor when we were forced to be there on Saturday) as well.

It was 4-5 months of solid 60 hr weeks - 10 hr days during the week and an additional 10 hrs over the weekend. DH was deployed, so it was just me holding down the fort. To make it worse, even though we were working our asses off the only comment we ever got was 'can you do more in less time'. Never a 'thank you' or any recognition that we were giving up significant time with our families (the main guy for the entire back end operation wife had a baby during that year and he pretty much never saw her or the baby). People were staying the night in the hotel next to our office because it didn't make sense for them to go home.

The only thing that made it better was finishing the project and then getting a new boss for our department. She was the first boss we'd had who actually said NO to the others in charge.

In the mean time, if you have someone you can vent to, that really helped me. If you can work out some of your pent up frustration doing something physical - that helped me too (I went to my parents house and pulled weeds - monotonous and physically tiring all while bitching to my mom about the incompetent weasels I worked with). Oh and my mom's cat had kittens during that time too - so I had kitten therapy.

[Deleted]

That sounds rough, I'm sorry. Have you been looking for something better?

[agnes]

Aug 21, 2012 20:06:20 GMT -5 gogreengowhite said:

So, if you ever been to the point where the thought of work makes you cry (I'm looking at you angryharpy) what did/do you do to snap out of it once you're at home?

I got a new job. That's what really snapped me out of it. But On the really bad days, I would call MH crying before I even got home. Sometimes I would just tell him ahead of time not to bother asking about my day because I just wanted to forget about it. And try to drown my sorrows in TV and cuddling.

[gogreengowhite]

Aug 21, 2012 22:18:33 GMT -5 @notquiteblushing said:

That sounds rough, I'm sorry. Have you been looking for something better?

Yes, I started applying this week. I'm also going to talk to the guy overseeing us (from our parent company) tomorrow and see if there is something that he can do.

Thank you for all of the responses. On Monday, I sat and cried in front of my son's car seat before taking him out. I just felt like such a terrible mom, and this is not the person I want to be.

[chessie]

I have my rituals that make it better. I work out more to fight off the stress. I surround myself with pictures and reasons why I am there. I have looked around, I cant find any other jobs unfortunately, job market sucks..I hear ya I know how it is. My manager changes yearly with org changes and I havent got a raise since 2008? I never really want to go in anymore, to them if your not giving up your entire life your not doing a good enough job, which I cant simply do all the time anymore, I was making myself physically sick.

[gogreengowhite]

Chessie- I do the same thing, try to remind myself why I'm there. The problem now is I'm only making about $1200 a month after paying for 2 kids in daycare. I know the whole 401k, added security of savings, security of supporting myself if something happens to DH. But, damn it's getting hard.

[Deleted]

Before getting pregnant my coping mechanism was daily exercise and 1-2 beers/ glasses of wine per night. Now I'm just trying to survive energy wise, and obviously not drinking. It's been really hard and I've cried a few times both at work and at home. Work stress seems to be letting up a little; I hope to be on auto pilot by mid-September. I've had high-ish blood pressure, and when my obgyn mentioned the potential for bed rest I was actually really excited, which is obviously a bad sign.

DH and I have agreed that by this time next year, we both need to be happier/ more fulfilled in our jobs. I can't keep doing this.