The Bedtime Pass (NPR article)

[water*drop]

@lauralynne suggested this method to us when we were having bedtime trouble with DD (3yo) over the summer. It completely changed bedtime in our house, so I was really interested when I read this article this morning and wanted to share:

www.npr.org/sections/health-shots/2015/09/18/441492810/the-bedtime-pass-helps-parents-and-kids-skip-the-sleep-struggles

The idea is that the child gets a piece of paper to use as a pass that they can use for bedtime stalling once, but after that, their stalling efforts are ignored. It gives them a sense of control over the situation. It made such a huge difference for us. DD still takes an hour+ to fall asleep, but she uses her pass and then just reads or plays with her babies quietly. I was shocked that it worked so well after a few days for her to adjust to the idea that we weren't engaging in conversation over the monitor, etc. We do go in if she has an accident or whatever, but we do whatever we need to do in complete silence, so she doesn't get attention out of it.

[anna7602]

Haven't read it yet, but what is the idea of the "pass" v. just saying, "I don't care what you do in there as long as you don't come out and bother me" (my method).

[water*drop]

Sept 19, 2015 11:10:28 GMT -5 anna7602 said:

Haven't read it yet, but what is the idea of the "pass" v. just saying, "I don't care what you do in there as long as you don't come out and bother me" (my method).

The pass just gives them a sense of control because they CAN ask for you to come back in or come out, but only once. For DD, gaining that sense of control took us from well over an hour of her whining for us to come back in or her sneaking out to one of us coming back in for 5 minutes at the time of her choosing with peace the rest of the time between bedtime and when she actually falls asleep.