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[ECB]

There are a few possible facets to this.

Part of this is just "life". Between work, family, my home life, neighbors, etc - life is just busy. I have a close group of friends from college, but we hardly ever see one another. Especially once you throw kids in the mix! We're just all going off in a million different directions and it's hard to find a time that is good for all of us.

Part of this might be that you need to expand your social circle. You only reach out to these 3 to get together for dinner, etc? Yeah.... open that up a bit!

Another part of this too might be that you're putting more emphasis on the "closeness" of these friends than they do. You see the 4 of you as this tight group. They may see everyone as really good friends, but not as their "only" or "only close" friends. It kind of ties into expanding your circle, but a part if it (sadly) might be that they just aren't holding onto this clique from the past as much as you do.

Lastly- be careful of relying on FB as some kind of "proof" of the super fun/busy lives people lead. I fall into this trap too. I see someone post a couple pictures of a fun night out, and I get it in my head that they do this ALL THE TIME. what is wrong w/ me that I don't have more exciting stuff going on?!?!

But then I realize that reality is that ONE set of pictures every couple weeks may really be the only time they are doing somehting out of the norm.

I have a friend who really does seem to always be on the go. Great trips, busy life, lots of friends, etc. People comment to her "wow- you really have a fun life!".

I post stuff from the things we do. Sometimes we get backed up w/ a lot of fun things in a short period, then we'll go into a dry period. But not too long ago DH and I went away for a night, posted some pics from the night, and someone commented to US about the "wow- what a fun life you all lead".

But cripes - come to my house during a normal week, my life isn't like that and *I* feel like my life is pretty dull!

We really do see snapshots through FB of each others lives, and it can give us a certain impression of a persons life - but I don't think it's always an accurate impression.

[cajunmom]

I feel like you could be MY best friend talking. I feel like I've kinda put her on the back burner for a while and have been spending a lot of time with other friends/activities that don't include her. Part of it is distance (she lives 40 minutes away, as opposed to my "local" friends who are no more than 10 min away), part of it is just everything we both have going on right now. But I still love her to bits and jump at the chance to hang out when we are able to work out the logistics for both of us.

[countthestars]

I'm sorry you're feeling that way . I feel like I am the other friend in this situation. We have plans all the time - some fun, some not so fun, and it's hard to make plans with my good friends. On May 1st we went through our calendar and realized that we had plans all but 2 weekends through August - weddings, camping trip with siblings, travel to see family. I take an exercise class 2 nights per week and travel for work on some week nights and I have to fit in time with H.

My three suggestions would be
1. plan early - if she has time a few weeks from now, book something with her and stick with it.
2. invite her to do things often, even if she turns you down a lot. my friends and i invite each other every time we go shopping, get our nails done, etc. Even if those plans don't work out, we try to make other plans because of it - "oh, i can't go tonight but i could grab lunch with you tomorrow?"
3. try for small/sort get togethers. I love when my friend brings over coffee during my lunch break because it gives us a half hour to catch up. Hanging out doesn't have to be a 4 hour event (not saying that you think it does, but just suggesting that short gtgs can be good too!)

[chessie]

Pretty much how my friends are. Everyone is so busy, kids, work..most work night shifts. We plan things months in advance and only can see each other a few times a year if we are lucky. We email, text more then anything though. Right now we are in the works planning stuff for a get together for around the holiday season mid December.

[nonsenseabound]

We plan things out as far as three months away. It is hard between friends, work, family, etc.

One thing we do is an annual celebration with friends. It is always in early January and we do a big potluck and gift exchange. It is fun and low key. Most people make it. It definitely helps keep us all in touch.