I want to cry.. potty training help please --UPDATE IN OP

[minerswife17]

So this past Wednesday, I purchased and read the 3 day potty training book by Lora Jensen. Thursday we started and now we're on day 4. Through the entire book she states "it will click by the end of day 3." LIES. DD has done really well I think but she still has accidents. Sometimes she will tell me she has to go and other times she will still have accidents. I scoop her up and take her to the potty and she always finishes. When she uses the potty I dance, cheer, tell her what a big girl she is, give her a mini marhsmallow, all the rewards and positive reinforcement. 

She has an appt. tomorrow with her ST and I'm too nervous to take her because she'll pee everywhere so I have to cancel first thing in the a.m. I can't stand being stuck in the house much longer. She starts doing so well and will pee in the potty 3-4 times in a row then bam... pee on the floor. 

Basically, I'm looking for all the hair pats and advice. 

Thank you ladies for all of your advice and for encouraging me for us out of the house. We really needed it. I think DD did more than me! We went to therapy and offered the potty before she started and after we left. Nothing either time, repeat that with 3 other times with quick trips. We went to visit my grandma and she finally peed! Yayyy. I was so proud of her. She did so well. Thanks again everyone

[usm]

How old is she? Does she seem excited about wearing big girl underwear?

I'm sorry, PTing sucked for us and became a control thing.

[NandaB]

Ugh, I'm sorry you're struggling. I know that method works for many people, but she's not like a professional or anything. She's a mom who this happened to work for. So it may not work for you. I never tried it because I didn't want to deal with a naked kid and piss everywhere.

[minerswife17]

She is 2.5. I know I should've done it sooner. She loves her big girl undies and everything about using the potty. She says "bye pee" "bye poopoo" and loves to flush, wash her hands and everything.

[minerswife17]

Oct 18, 2015 9:44:55 GMT -5 NandaB said:

Ugh, I'm sorry you're struggling. I know that method works for many people, but she's not like a professional or anything. She's a mom who this happened to work for. So it may not work for you. I never tried it because I didn't want to deal with a naked kid and piss everywhere.

May I ask what method or approach you took? I'm desperate.

[usm]

Oct 18, 2015 9:45:48 GMT -5 minerswife17 said:

She is 2.5. I know I should've done it sooner. She loves her big girl undies and everything about using the potty. She says "bye pee" "bye poopoo" and loves to flush, wash her hands and everything.

C was over 3 when I started. I only started because he had to be trained for 3 yr old preschool so I don't think you are behind at all. He was 3 yes 6 months before we figured poop out.

She may not be completely ready. And like NandaB said, it's just a mom who it worked for. If there is anything I have learned in parenthood is it doesn't matter what we read or know if our kid didn't read the same manual. They are all different.

[NandaB]

Oct 18, 2015 9:49:36 GMT -5 minerswife17 said:

Oct 18, 2015 9:44:55 GMT -5 NandaB said:

Ugh, I'm sorry you're struggling. I know that method works for many people, but she's not like a professional or anything. She's a mom who this happened to work for. So it may not work for you. I never tried it because I didn't want to deal with a naked kid and piss everywhere.

May I ask what method or approach you took? I'm desperate.

Bribes. Lol

Disclaimer: N is now 2.5 and completely uninterested. Wont sit on the potty at all. But G was totally day trained by this age. I made a sticker chart and bought a bunch of cars and other cheap junk and put it in my old treasure chest from my teaching days. I kept him in diapers,but asked him ever 30 mim or so of he had to go. I encouraged him to listen to his body,but if he said no I didn't press the issue. He got a sticker for every pee in the potty and 2 for poop. After a certain amount of stickers he got a prize (I think it was 4. He got one basically every day) wetsiapers I just changed and said, that's ok, just listen to your body so you can get a sticker!!

After 2 weeks he said he wanted to wear underwear. He maybe 2 accidents on day one, and then only a handful after that.

[jag01]

No suggestions, just my sympathy. I found potty training the least favorite stage.

[lala]

I didn't do the 3 day method or expect no accidents in 3 days, I think that's unrealistic. Re: going out, you have 2 options - put diapers on for the first few days/weeks but still treat her like she's wearing underwear. Or just wear underwear and deal. I chose the latter as long as we had a 15 min drive or less. Yes, there will be accidents out, that's life.

I don't think you waited too long. I also don't think you need to give up yet.

[auroraloo]

My kids are 2 and 3 and have zero interest.

[cjcouple]

My advice? Stop. She's not ready. Not all kids at 2.5 are ready. It shouldn't be 5 hat stressfulmfor either of you.
Try again in a couple months. When she truly is ready. She will get it

[cjcouple]

Ans for the record. Both my boys were 3 and when they were ready. There was no stress. A couple accidents? Yes. But nothing unexpected. And I never had to hide in the house and avoid public.

[lala]

Why is still having a few accidents after only 4 days of "training" considered not ready? I haven't heard anything from Minerswife that signals she's definitely not ready.

But both of mine trained at 28 & 26 months, so that's all I have experience with.

[lala]

Oct 18, 2015 11:21:59 GMT -5 cjcouple said:

Ans for the record. Both my boys were 3 and when they were ready. There was no stress. A couple accidents? Yes. But nothing unexpected. And I never had to hide in the house and avoid public.

I think the reason she initially stayed in the house is b/c that's what the 3 day method says to do. I never stayed in the house. 

[cjcouple]

Oct 18, 2015 11:23:20 GMT -5 lala said:

Why is still having a few accidents after only 4 days of "training" considered not ready? I haven't heard anything from Minerswife that signals she's definitely not ready.

But both of mine trained at 28 & 26 months, so that's all I have experience with.

Its just my opibion but she said she is afraid to leave the house. PT shouldn't hold them hostage or be so stressful she is in tears.

[cjcouple]

Oct 18, 2015 11:23:54 GMT -5 lala said:

Oct 18, 2015 11:21:59 GMT -5 cjcouple said:

Ans for the record. Both my boys were 3 and when they were ready. There was no stress. A couple accidents? Yes. But nothing unexpected. And I never had to hide in the house and avoid public.

I think the reason she initially stayed in the house is b/c that's what the 3 day method says to do. I never stayed in the house. 

Oh i don't know anything about that method. I would flip the eff out being stuck at home over PTing

[lala]

Oh I agree that it shouldn't be keeping her at home or making her that upset - hear that Miners? Relax. But I also think it's b/c she expected the method to work. Some talk about the 3 day method like it's the holy grail of PTing. Like anything else, it works for some. If it doesn't work as described, I don't think that means the kid isn't' ready. Maybe she's sick of staying home, too!

[minerswife17]

80% of the time we are out of the house 4-5 days a week between ST, errands, grocery shopping, visiting family, etc. Yesterday when she got up she ran to my closet so we could get clothes for me so we could go out. She seemed sad we weren't leaving.

I feel bad because she is supposed to have therapy tomorrow and run to grab the stuff I need to make dinner. It's DHs bday and I don't want to feel trapped in the house yet another day when it's supposed to be a fun day. I figured from the book and testimonials that she would be ready by tmrw. Womp womp womp

[minerswife17]

I would like to confess that since tomorrow is DHs bday and his job gives him the day off I should just say screw it and go about the day as planned. Him being there will give me an extra set of hands in case of an accident... Right?!?!

I feel like it's genius but also a bad idea. Ha

[quesyrah]

I tried at 2 because all the kids in our playgroup were training. Disaster. I was so frustrated.

Tried again at 2.5 people those jerks kept saying "oh he's still in diapers?" Disaster.

A day after he turned 3 he asked for underwear. I put them on him, he had 1 accident and basically trained himself. I didn't do any type of rewards or anything because he literally started using the potty all on his own. And I don't think the 2 previous attempts had anything to do with it.

DD is 2 and is already showing interest in the potty and will often pee in it.

So, I'm team every kid is different and wait until they're ready.

[Deleted]

I'm with lala...sounds like she's actually doing well. We did the 3 day method with dd at 26 months and in reality it took about 5-7 days.

We tried ds then and he was so not ready, every time was an accident., even after 3 days So we waited until like 2.5 and it took ONE day.

Since she's doing so well, I'd say keep going. Go out tomorrow and maybe wear a pull-up or something in the car if you want and take her at ST (or pull-up for your outing, but still try to take her potty one or twice). I really don't think it will ruin all your hard work or anything. Keep up the good work!

[usm]

I would go tomorrow. She might surprise you because she may pay better attention to her body. Just offer potty at the beginning and end of each stop, mine loves to see all the bathrooms so he's happy to try anywhere we are.


Just throw a few sets of clothes, wipes and maybe a towel in your car. If she has an accident I promise it won't be the first or the last they have seen. It may give both of you some confidence.

[minerswife17]

Oct 18, 2015 12:13:44 GMT -5 @sing4mysavior said:

I'm with lala...sounds like she's actually doing well. We did the 3 day method with dd at 26 months and in reality it took about 5-7 days.

We tried ds then and he was so not ready, every time was an accident., even after 3 days So we waited until like 2.5 and it took ONE day.

Since she's doing so well, I'd say keep going. Go out tomorrow and maybe wear a pull-up or something in the car if you want and take her at ST (or pull-up for your outing, but still try to take her potty one or twice). I really don't think it will ruin all your hard work or anything. Keep up the good work!

When you did this with your DD and seeing it took 5-7 days, did you stay in the whole time or did you leave the house? Glad your DD had success with it. 

The book says no pull ups or diapers at anytime so I'm just afraid of regression (even though she's not fully trained yet.)

[Deleted]

Oct 18, 2015 12:22:15 GMT -5 minerswife17 said:

Oct 18, 2015 12:13:44 GMT -5 @sing4mysavior said:

I'm with lala...sounds like she's actually doing well. We did the 3 day method with dd at 26 months and in reality it took about 5-7 days.

We tried ds then and he was so not ready, every time was an accident., even after 3 days So we waited until like 2.5 and it took ONE day.

Since she's doing so well, I'd say keep going. Go out tomorrow and maybe wear a pull-up or something in the car if you want and take her at ST (or pull-up for your outing, but still try to take her potty one or twice). I really don't think it will ruin all your hard work or anything. Keep up the good work!

When you did this with your DD and seeing it took 5-7 days, did you stay in the whole time or did you leave the house? Glad your DD had success with it. 

The book says no pull ups or diapers at anytime so I'm just afraid of regression (even though she's not fully trained yet.)

We went out after the 1st three days. We went potty before we left and when we got to each place and again if she said anything. I think the 1st time I kept her in a pull-up, but she did ok so we tried underwear after that.

That's what the book says, but you do what you want. That's the best part of parenting... you take in all the advice, and then do whatever works for you. GL!

[minerswife17]

Oct 18, 2015 12:43:45 GMT -5 @mama2b said:

As an SLP, please do not cancel tx. I would do pull ups and still take to potty as usual while at tx or come in underwear. Your therapist would likely prefer you come than not. A day of cancellation likely means they cannot fill your slot and that could tank her productivity.

I think you should carry on with potty training. None of mine have been accident free in that little of time.

Thank you. DDs therapist is the actually the one that told me she should be PT by now, so I hope she will be understanding if there would ever be an accident. 

There is a bathroom as soon as you walk in the door so I'll show it to DD and offer it to her before and after her session. It's only 30 mins so I'm hoping she'll be fine. 

[lala]

It really is not a big deal to go out w/ a kid that is potty training. You bring extra clothes and roll with it. Take them to the bathroom at ever stop, several times if needed. Ask them every 10 minutes if they have to go. Make them sit on the toilet at certain times. It will be fine, really. It's not debilitating.

[Kcthepouchh8r]

We did the three day method and my son trained in 2.5 days at 30 months both day and night. Maybe two accidents in that first month after those first initial days and then never again outside of illness. I do believe this method does work that quickly (or the kid just mostly self trains) if the kid is 100% ready. With that being said I don't think you have to have full 100% readiness to be successful in potty training. I think it depends on how committed to the process you are. If it's important for you to get it over with and you're having more success than accidents, keep on going. If not, scrap it and try it in a few months; it might go quicker then. For me I'm just not committed enough to cleaning up regular accidents that I would keep on going if my kid didn't catch on quickly. Some people have more patience; my nephew had accidents for a year before fully potty training but my SIL would rather deal with a pair of dirty underwear daily than diapers.

[Kcthepouchh8r]

Also go out. They have plastic training pants that fit over underwear at target/Walmart that contain messes.

[Deleted]

I didn't do the 3-day method either, and I think it might be putting too much pressure on you and your DD. She's getting it sometimes - that's a success in my books! My DS trained a month before he turned 3, but it wasn't in 3 days or anything. When I took him out, I had him sit on the potty right before we got in the car. I put down a thin waterproof pad on the carseat and told him that we'd be in the car for 15 minutes (short trips only) so he had to hold his pee, but we could go to the bathroom as soon as we got there.

If we went to a store, I'd take him as soon as we got there, or before leaving.

I don't think accidents are a big deal, and being in potty jail sounds like too much pressure for both of you. Do some short trips, bring a change of clothes everywhere and keep encouraging. You might have to change your mindset. She's getting the idea, so you're both doing great! Accidents happen. And she might surprise you by holding her pee while you're out, instinctively!

[Deleted]

Oct 18, 2015 13:10:10 GMT -5 lala said:

It really is not a big deal to go out w/ a kid that is potty training. You bring extra clothes and roll with it. Take them to the bathroom at ever stop, several times if needed. Ask them every 10 minutes if they have to go. Make them sit on the toilet at certain times. It will be fine, really. It's not debilitating.

This is what I did, too. Asked all the time, and in the very beginning, I also set a timer for every 30-45 mins and when it went off, we'd go have a "try". I didn't make him sit for long, but we'd just go and try, to get him used to being in the bathroom a lot and to catch more moments of success. I really think if your daughter is excited, and understands the process/handwashing,etc., she's doing really well!