Sometimes I want to bang my head on a wall (whiny vent)

[cna]

And today is one of those times. Talking to DS1's teacher today was very enlightening for me. He scored well above school/district averages on his tests and is easily one of the smartest in his class(as per his teacher). The problem is that he doesn't focus on his work, is easily distracted, and ends up turning in incomplete work.

It is so incredibly frustrating that we KNOW how smart he is but it doesn't translate into his school work and it is showing on his progress reports. I don't even know what to do with that other than keep on him and have his teacher keep on him until this isn't a problem anymore. She told me it hurts her to see such an intelligent child not working up to his full potential, and she has promised she will do everything in her power to help.

In the meantime I will be over here banging my head on the wall.

[usm]

Hugs! We had conferences last week and got a similar report. How do you even teach attention span?!?

I feel like I'm banging my head on the wall every time I have to say his name 5 times go get him to acknowledge me.

[L From The D]

We have similar issues with DS. You are not alone, and it sucks.

[jnksmom]

I'm sorry you are struggling with that. I know it is frustrating. We had similar issues with DS last year also. We had to stay on him constantly as did his teacher. It got better but was a struggle all through 2nd grade. He has done much better this year in 3rd grade.

[cna]

Thanks guys. Sometimes the hard parts of being a parent make me want to have a full on screaming crying toddler tantrum. I am just frustrated for him because I know he has the ability but he just sucks at focusing and getting it done when he's supposed to.

[auroraloo]

Shit like this is why I hate grades. Sorry.

[MDmomof2]

We are in the same position with DS (he'll be 5 in December) and are currently having him tested for ADD. He's not at all hyperactive, but he CANNOT focus. After a year of having people say "He's a 4 year old boy!" it became obvious to us that other 4 year old boys had more focus than he did - he seemed significantly behind his peers. I don't know the outcome of his testing/observations yet but I hope they give us some tools to help him complete tasks.

[usm]

Oct 22, 2015 8:22:10 GMT -5 MDmomof2 said:

We are in the same position with DS (he'll be 5 in December) and are currently having him tested for ADD. He's not at all hyperactive, but he CANNOT focus. After a year of having people say "He's a 4 year old boy!" it became obvious to us that other 4 year old boys had more focus than he did - he seemed significantly behind his peers. I don't know the outcome of his testing/observations yet but I hope they give us some tools to help him complete tasks.

What made you Do testing now? This sounds just like C( except he turned 5 in May). I don't feel like people see it as much as a problem because he isn't anymore active or hyper than his peers but his focus is significantly different. We have been working on it since 3. We did OT and it seemed to help and we are working on starting to implement some strategies in K. We are debating on when we should pull the trigger on testing. I am worried he is still young enough that it will be difficult to diffienciat at this time.

[MDmomof2]

We had a conference with his teachers back in April, when he was 4.5, and they expressed concern about his lack of focus. We kind of did the "he's a 4 year old boy!" thing in our heads, even though they said he was less focused than the other 4 year old boys in the class. He's a leftie with a poor pencil grip so we really brought him in to have his fine motor skills evaluated. We mentioned the lack of focus then and when they observed him in his classroom they also noted the lack of focus and suggested we specifically have him evaluated for ADD. They will again observe him in his class, they will do some sort of testing (which happens tomorrow) and he will also have a hearing test. I think his hearing is fine but it's good that they test for it! Since he's still in pre-school we are going through the county diagnostic center. Once he gets to school its a different process but I'm not sure what that is.

[Kcthepouchh8r]

Correct me if I'm wrong but doesn't he have a diagnosis/iep? If so you may want to call an emergency meeting. There may be some accommodations like movement breaks, seating changes, etc that may help him stay focused on tasks.

I do relate though. My child is four, reads at a first grade level but is too self directed to complete the easiests of tasks at times.

[cna]

Oct 22, 2015 11:54:00 GMT -5 Kcthepouchh8r said:

Correct me if I'm wrong but doesn't he have a diagnosis/iep? If so you may want to call an emergency meeting. There may be some accommodations like movement breaks, seating changes, etc that may help him stay focused on tasks.

I do relate though. My child is four, reads at a first grade level but is too self directed to complete the easiests of tasks at times.

The last time he was evaluated he didn't quite meet diagnostic criteria and lost his IEP. I'm not sure if I just overlooked it before or if it's new, but he has to be redirected several times just trying to finish one sheet of work. Like I know he knows the material but he doesn't really focus on what he's doing and is very easily distracted.

[Kcthepouchh8r]

Oct 22, 2015 12:32:30 GMT -5 cna said:

Oct 22, 2015 11:54:00 GMT -5 Kcthepouchh8r said:

Correct me if I'm wrong but doesn't he have a diagnosis/iep? If so you may want to call an emergency meeting. There may be some accommodations like movement breaks, seating changes, etc that may help him stay focused on tasks.

I do relate though. My child is four, reads at a first grade level but is too self directed to complete the easiests of tasks at times.

The last time he was evaluated he didn't quite meet diagnostic criteria and lost his IEP. I'm not sure if I just overlooked it before or if it's new, but he has to be redirected several times just trying to finish one sheet of work. Like I know he knows the material but he doesn't really focus on what he's doing and is very easily distracted.

Is he still being tracked by the developmental pedi or psych who initially diagnosed him? If so you might want to call for an appointment or if he has a follow up sometime soon you may want to look at getting his iq tested. If you can show a discrepancy between his intelligence and the level of work he's producing you can make a case that he still requires academic support. You may want to reach out to a local special ed advisory group in your area as well explaining that he had a diagnosis, doesn't anymore but is struggling to complete work that he is more than capable of doing. You may be able to get a 504 and some of those classroom modifications like movement breaks might really help him complete the work required.

[cna]

Oops, didn't mean to run off like that, wasn't planning on getting horribly sick and nearly ending up in the hospital.

Anyway, thanks everyone. We have it on the radar of the right people so we will keep on him and figure it out as we go.