Random funnies?

[Deleted]

Now that I'm done beating myself up, figured I would share something mortifying that happened last week and hope you all have some good funnies.

So my friend brought her new boyfriend over for dinner to my house. H and I like him, he's easy going, we ate BBQ and watched a movie.

Well, I get up from the couch and have my plate in hand and use my free left hand to kinda push my hair back and my ring gets snagged on my shirt but my arm keeps moving and yeah I basically pulled my shirt up and my left (in a bra) boob might have just been out. I don't think he or anyone saw but still I'm dying even sharing it because wtf.

[dizzycooks]

Today my oldest convinced her daycare teachers it was her birthday over the weekend. They celebrated today with a crown, sticker and her choice of game during circle time. Then they sent me a pic. I emailed back and asked if they realized it wasn't actually her birthday. They hadn't checked and had a good laugh. Silly girl. We had a conversation about being honest and then discussed when her birthday actually is. I'm pretty sure it's clear as mud for her now.

[Deleted]

DS asked me a while back what a robber was, so we talked about stealing and the police, etc. He got it and moved on. Then we were in the store looking at towels at the grocery store, and they have the carts with the rack under the big part of the cart, for big items. I put the towels on that rack to separate them from the food. I guess DS thought I was trying to hide them or something, because right as an employee walked by, DS suddenly yelled "But you shouldn't STEAL those, mama. Then the police will come!"

The employee gave me the side eye, and I'm sure I was blushing from head to toe. Great timing for a theft talk, DS. (And BTW, I've never stolen anything in my life.)

[cna]

DS2 had a fortune cookie today and the fortune said something along the lines of "you will soon acquire a fortune".

He didn't understand why I was laughing so hard.

[ashb62]

I have two DD (7) funnies:

We're getting ready to go on a Disney cruise and I was having her try on the shirt I made her for the Pirate deck party. She said, "Mom, I need long sleeves! If it's cold here it's going to be cold in the Obamas!" (We're going to the Bahamas.)

We were in the car and she randomly asked, "Was everything black and white in Bible times like it was in the old days?"