kind of fascinating thread on ML

[amandasw]

pandce.proboards.com/index.cgi?board=ml&action=display&thread=49288

no thoughts in particular, just some good 'drama' if you're bored!

(like me, who woke up early for no reason and your H is still asleep)

[Deleted]

only to the bottom of page one. definitely fascinating! thanks! i love some good drama!!!

[amandasw]

haha

I feel like as time goes on, I am more and more confused by ML. like, I understand why some of them are arguing with her, but on the other hand, I don't really disagree with her as much of some of them do. Or maybe I'm just giving her the benefit of the doubt and 'get' what she's trying to say.

[tacocat]

I read that instead of cleaning... I blame you Amanda!!!

[tacocat]

I partially understand her though... Not much, but some things

[amandasw]

Aug 25, 2012 14:53:40 GMT -5 @sfgal530 said:

Oh I read this one this morning! I am finding myself really enjoying ML.

I don't agree with the people who got SO outraged and say that it's never one spouse's fault if the other one cheats. Sorry, but I think in most cases that by the time it gets to that situation you've had warning signs. You just chose not to acknowledge them or do anything about it. Not saying that cheating is okay, because it isn't; I'm just saying that while you can blame the person for taking the action to cheat, you have to blame both people for not investing more into their relationship. The cheater can't make it work on his/her own.

yeah, this is exactly how I feel.

ML is very strange - I've gone in and out of interacting there and there are certain things they all* agree on/get feisty about and if there is a thread with a flaming, you pretty much can't disagree with the popular people. It's basically HS all over again (even though they act like they are superior, free-thinking beings who have thought through every topic known to man and come up with the correct answer).

*by all I mean the 'cool kids' - they would probably argue that they aren't a closed circle, but it's pretty clear who they will and won't backup. Although there are regulars who disagree about things, you know who is 'liked' the most

[BlackCanary]

I only got to the bottom of the first page and I gave up on reading the rest.

As someone who has been emotionally cheated* on, I am of the opinion that cheating is never ok. I really don't want to go into the details, but it hurt so bad. Even after 8 years (holy crap, 8 years? dang) I can still remember the hurt I felt.

*I say emotion cheating because I don't have proof there was physical. And I don't want to get into an argument about emotional vs physical cheating. Sorry if that sounded bitchy.

[amandasw]

Aug 25, 2012 15:04:56 GMT -5 BlackCanary said:

I only got to the bottom of the first page and I gave up on reading the rest.

As someone who has been emotionally cheated* on, I am of the opinion that cheating is never ok. I really don't want to go into the details, but it hurt so bad. Even after 8 years (holy crap, 8 years? dang) I can still remember the hurt I felt.

*I say emotion cheating because I don't have proof there was physical. And I don't want to get into an argument about emotional vs physical cheating. Sorry if that sounded bitchy.

oh I COMPLETELY agree with you - and I think emotional is just as bad as physical. It's not like people should go around 'blaming' the victim, but I think in a marriage you are sort of equal partners and both people need to take part of the responsibility when things are bad. It's such a fine line, but really, a healthy relationship is always about putting the other person first. You can't really take a side if both people are being selfish IMO.

(none of this is directed at you BTW, just talking about the ML conversation)

[jennlin]

i read too much of that. i disagree with the OP's attitude, and i agree with ML's idea that she's getting "off" scott-free. it's unfair to her husband. but meh. i don't really know my "official stance" on the whole thread.....