Comments that sting.

[Deleted]

Some people just don't think.
I'm at the PTA meeting this morning. Probably I wasn't thinking lol.
One of the executive people says to me 'haven't seen you around before. Thanks for coming'
So I said 'yeah I can't come to the evening meetings. Work'
She says 'yeah I was like that when my kids were little too. Then they got bigger and I made the time'
She wasn't saying it judgey but it was.
I came to the damn meeting lady. I made a little time.

[Deleted]

You know she'd lose her mind if she needed to go to a pharmacy and it closed at 5 pm.

[simpsongal]

Grrrrr......"make the time" - that makes me want to make the time to punch her in the face. We all "make time" for various things. You know what I make time for? Yoga and drinking.

[Deleted]

Dec 10, 2015 10:46:43 GMT -5 @tokenhoser said:

You know she'd lose her mind if she needed to go to a pharmacy and it closed at 5 pm.

Don't even get me started.
But thanks for the support.

[anna7602]

Well, you do only have one kid... (That was sarcasm.)

Gaaa, I hate people! I was at an event at DD's school the other night and one of the volunteers who helped set up for it earlier in the day was bitching, in ear shot of other parents, about the SAH moms and how she had to use PTO to volunteer. Um, yay for you that you get paid vacation time to volunteer? What business is it of yours why people volunteer or not?

[Deleted]

More hilarity from the PTA meeting.
I guess the drop off line and parking situation is getting out of hand. People rushing and not doing things properly.
So the oneDad says 'why not get rid of late notes and then nobody will rush?'
People agreed
Is that the generation we want to raise? You are late everyday? We will change the attendance time.

[SallySparrow]

She needs to shut up. For real. She didn't "make time", she's lucky enough to HAVE time. People are really annoying the shit out of me lately. Pregnancy hormones?

[whitepicketfence]

Some people are clueless.

On a side note, our PTS is interesting. Only one or two moms are SAH parents. Even our board is made up of mostly working moms.

[juliette21]

I feel like the PCC (our PTA) is like mean girls for moms. I go to the events, and I get the cold shoulder from all of them. Brings me right back to high school.

[Ashley&Scott]

"You can't have just 1 kid, you need at least 2."

ETA: I really want to tell people to back the F off when they say this. Since it's not my choice & out of my control, I hate being reminded that I very well might not get the big family I dreamed of.

[mcfelix]

That's just a shitty thing to say. How nice for her that she is able to "make the time." That's not a choice everyone has the ability to make. Outside of the fact that plenty of people wouldn't choose to anyway!

[bexporter]

Idiotic comments like that shouldn't sting. They should make you laugh.

[carolinagirl831]

ugh,that is just rude!

[pinkdutchtulips]

R would make such a great big sister ! Why didn't you have any more ?

Miss R is fantastic w babies and toddlers and no doubt in my mind she would be a fantastic big sis ... too bad I would have lost my damn mind and gone bankrupt w 2 kids

[pinkdutchtulips]

I broke into the PTA this year and *gulp* chaired a committee EEK! While mine is mostly made up of SAHMs, most of them know me either through dd (PTA president's dd and mine were in the same kinder class last year) or through Girl Scouts ... and they know it's a minor miracle I can make it to evening PTA mtgs with dd in tow (single parent). So far so good everyone's been friendly but there are a few parents that make me roll my damn eyes and bc of their lunacy, I have no plans on NOT chairing some low level committee just to have a say.

[rugbywife]

Someone at my PPMD group used the term 'complete family' in reference to having two kids (like she had a second and now she had a 'real' family...I wish I could remember the exact wording...but complete was in there).

All I could think of was if any of the other moms were contemplating being OAD and how this comment would feel.

[cilantro]

Ugh, I'm sorry. I'll add one.

My SAHM friend uses the phrase "full time mom" to describe herself a lot.

Umm...you realize the implication for working mom's right? I never stop being a mom. It's a relationship, not a job.

[Deleted]

Dec 10, 2015 11:08:41 GMT -5 juliette21 said:

I feel like the PCC (our PTA) is like mean girls for moms. I go to the events, and I get the cold shoulder from all of them. Brings me right back to high school.

And they have cliques within the PTA. I saw one of them rolling her eyes while the other one was talking.
I don't need to make time for that - thanks

[anaps28]

@hannymaren you know what I'm going to say...let's hope she will be needing immodium today. LOL

[aspentosh]

Dec 10, 2015 12:01:35 GMT -5 rugbywife said:

Someone at my PPMD group used the term 'complete family' in reference to having two kids (like she had a second and now she had a 'real' family...I wish I could remember the exact wording...but complete was in there).

All I could think of was if any of the other moms were contemplating being OAD and how this comment would feel.

And that doesn't even call into play the people that were forced into being OAD for whatever reason. 

People suck.

[pizzapizza]

I feel like people that say this kind of shit have their own issues with self-worth and feel better about themselves when they put other people down - either purposefully or inadvertently.

[CrazyLucky]

I do the volunteering, but DH goes to the PTO meetings. He has one tonight, and I'm going to ask him if any of these dynamics happen. I'm sure he will not notice either way.
I volunteered yesterday, and all the other moms were SAH, but they were all super nice. Maybe I'll make a friend!

[bronxgirl]

Dec 10, 2015 11:10:03 GMT -5 Ashley&Scott said:

"You can't have just 1 kid, you need at least 2."

ETA: I really want to tell people to back the F off when they say this. Since it's not my choice & out of my control, I hate being reminded that I very well might not get the big family I dreamed of.

I know just what you mean and it hurts like a MFer.

[VillainV]

The "when are you guys going to start trying for another?" comments sting. A lot of people don't know about my recent miscarriage and assume that no bump must mean we're not trying yet. People need to keep their mouths shut.

[5kcandlesinthewind]

Dec 10, 2015 11:12:09 GMT -5 bexporter said:

Idiotic comments like that shouldn't sting. They should make you laugh.

Yep. I would gave given her a big smile and said, "wow! That IS a sacrifice! I love my kid but I would feel SO INCOMPLETE if I didn't have a life outside of her." And then walked away.
(Ok, not really. I probably would have smiled awkwardly, then excused myself to the rest room, where I would have thought up 15 clever responses, and then been annoyed the rest of the day. But just laughing it off would be better.)

[cinco]

That is so obnoxious. What is it about PTA that brings out judgement? I've gotten it on the other side too. Like I have no excuse to not be on the PTA b/c I stay home. The meetings are at 3pm, after the kids are home and they don't have child care. DH works until 9 or 10 most nights. I don't see how that time works for anyone, but okay. My parents were teachers and never helped with PTA b/c they were DONE with school stuff and parents after dealing with it all day at work. I sure as hell never felt like they were less involved in my life.

[leonard131]

That is just sucky.  I am so not looking forward to the PTA days. I feel like that is when the SAH vs. Working will rear it's ugly head. 

[kershnic]

Dec 10, 2015 12:08:07 GMT -5 cilantro said:

Ugh, I'm sorry. I'll add one.

My SAHM friend uses the phrase "full time mom" to describe herself a lot.

Umm...you realize the implication for working mom's right? I never stop being a mom. It's a relationship, not a job.

How do you think these women would feel if you pointed out that perhaps their husbands stop being husbands when they go to work too?  

[bexporter]

Dec 11, 2015 10:33:21 GMT -5 @marshmallows said:

Dec 11, 2015 10:15:19 GMT -5 h said:

People are the worst.

DS1 had a soccer practice rescheduled from 5 to 4 yesterday (as though 5 isn't hard enough for working parents). I called the other two working moms of kids on the team and offered to pick their kids up at school and take them to practice with us because I knew the logistics of a 4pm practice would suck for them. When I showed up at practice with three players, a member of the SAHM clique was like, "why are you always bringing Sean and Andrew to practices? I think their moms are just taking advantage of you." After I told her that it was no big deal and that I offered and feel strongly about moms helping each other out in these situations, she was all "well I am not very sympathetic. Everyone makes their choices." I am kind of sorry that I didn't respond, "exactly. Just like you apparently choose to be a catty bitch."

OMG, this would make me rage.  Are these the same SAHMs who talk about how it's a luxury and a privilege to be able to stay at home?  Because that's a positional conflict if I've ever heard one!  (somehow my lawyer insult doesn't translate too well into real life(wilted) )

This is ridiculous!  Perhaps if practices weren't scheduled for 4 pm (a time when no working parent can get their child there), you wouldn't need to help these working moms.  Are they supposed to choose for their kids not to be on a soccer team because they work?

A related pet peeve - not knowing the practice and game time when you register for a sports league.  My 8 yo ended up with 5-6 basketball practice this year, which is next to impossible for us.  Thank goodness there's a friend on his team with a mom who works part time so she can take them and we can do pick up.

[numbers]

Dec 11, 2015 1:22:16 GMT -5 @cse1960 said:

"I made the time". Well well. How lovely for her. I might be tempted to say that to her, were she so graceless to say that again to me. "How lovely for you."

I am giving her withering glances in my head.

Are you Southern? If not, you'd make a great Southerner.