well, that went about how I expected...

[SallySparrow]

There's backstory that I'm too tired to recap. Short version: MIL has been a crazy, hateful person for the last year or so, to me, H, and SIL. We had H's big family Christmas today. MIL cornered me when I was alone outside with A and went off on me, in front of my two year old about how all our issues are my fault and how dare I not forgive her for the things she's said in the past (mind you, she's never apologized for any of it) and how I'm a bad person because I can't just get over it and realize that she "is who she is" and when she's mad she says mean things. And she "isn't going to change", so we're going to have to deal with it.

I picked A up and started walking away from her, because no way in Hell am I letting you engage me in a fight in front of my kid. And she starts SCREAMING at me across the lawn that I'm the one with the problem and I'm the cause of all her problems with H. H came outside so I handed A to him and asked him to go get her stuff. He took her inside and I turned around and told MIL that my only problem is that I was stuck with her for a MIL and that she's a psychotic bitch. I would like to say I feel sorry about that. But I don't. Even if that makes me an asshole. Then I told her if she ever spoke to me like that in front of my child again, she wouldn't be seeing her anymore.

H backed me up and told her that he's done. So...clearly I need to see my therapist next week. Because I'm not dealing with this well.

WTF is wrong with her? I mean, seriously. Normal people do not act like this. And the whole time we were putting A in the car, she's standing in the middle of the yard, crying hysterically that she didn't do anything and we just don't love her. I need to up my medication for this shit.

[zarapipe]

I'm so sorry. You did good though ans I'm glad your dh backed you up. Parents are hard man.

[waterchurch]

I'm so sorry. My dad's wife is the crazy one for me and when she went off on me in front of my kids we agreed we're not going to see her anymore.

Normal people don't act like this. I'm sorry.

[namasteak]

Oh SallySparrow I'm so sorry you have to deal with her. I'm not surprised you cracked and gave her a small piece of your mind and I think you were totally right to do so.

[redheadbaker]

I'm so sorry, and you're right -- normal people don't act like that.

[ECB]

I love the "this is who I am. You have to deal with it" argument because it actually goes both ways. "YEah, it's who I am that I don't associate with assholes. So, deal with it.".

Sorry, though.

[brooklyn]

Wtf. I'm so sorry she's a lunatic bitch. Reminds me a lot of a confrontation I had with my MIL. I'm so glad your H backed you up.

[pugz]

she is a heinous person who will bring no good to your life. Time to cut her off. She made her bed.

[Deleted]

you're a rock star, and you won't miss her. Until she's medicated, you can't be a part of that nonsense.

[bowies]

I'm sorry you have such a toxic person in your life. It's fucking hard.

Don't for a second feel any guilt over HER issues. They are hers alone. She gets off on feeling like a victim so just feel sorry for her from afar. You and your H handled it admirably.

[nextbigthing]

You handled it perfectly. She's not a normal person by any means.

Glad your H backs you up.

[Deleted]

Good for you and standing up for yourself and for your DH having your back.

I'm sorry you're not dealing with it well but you did great. Hugs.

[SallySparrow]

Thanks, everyone. It's just such a shitty situation, it's hard to feel anything other than irritation about it. And I feel bad for H.

[meltoine]

Ugh she sucks. You handled it really well. Kudos to you for not going off on her in front of A. I'm not sure I could have mustered such self restraint.

[bugandbibs]

I'm really sorry. I'm glad your husband is one the same page with you.

[aspentosh]

I am so glad your husband was on the same page. It's definitely time to cut ties.

Not a normal way to act. At all.

[rex]

I am glad you and your h are on the same page. she is toxic, so she has no place in your lives.

[curbsideprophet]

I'm sorry. Glad your DH backed you up.

[bananapancakes]

I'm so sorry you had to deal with that. I think you'd all be better off without her in your lives. Hugs.

[MNH2013]

I'm really sorry, that's terrible. Is H any closer to wanting to cut contact?

[ilikedonuts]

I'm sorry

Honestly your daughter should never be around her until she's 100% proven she's changed. She's had plenty of chances. It's not fair to your kid to have to be around that.

[SallySparrow]

Dec 12, 2015 20:03:56 GMT -5 MNH2013 said:

I'm really sorry, that's terrible. Is H any closer to wanting to cut contact?

Yeah, I think this pretty much did it. Thankfully. Because I can't handle it anymore. I let it go on way longer than I would have with anyone else, because I knew it was hard for him.

[boiler717]

I'm so sorry, we are in the trenches of a MIL battle too and it sucks.

[glitzy07]

Wow, I'm so sorry that you have to deal with that. I have my own MIL drama but it's much more of the passive aggressive variety. Honestly, good for you for standing up for yourself. How shitty of her to do that in front of a child.

[isabel]

Kudos to you for standing up to her. She sounds awful.

[winecheery]

Holy crap sally.  

You are nothing but kind.  I would not have been able to stand for that shit as long as you have.  Good riddance to bad rubbish.

I'm so sorry she was (is) so dreadful to you.  In a way, it's almost a shame your DD isn't old enough to remember this incident, so she can know for herself that her grandmother is a horrible person.  As it stands, I am sorry she had to be in the middle of it, and possibly feel scared or confused, being so young still.

[Muddled]

Good for you. Family shit is hard. It helps so very much to be on the same page.

You did great.

[Deleted]

Yikes. What a nutcase. I'm sorry you were put in the middle between him and his crazy mother. That would cause me crazy stress too.

[whiskeytails]

My mom is this person--so I relate. I wish I could do what you've done. I think you'll be happier once the guilt passes.