Omg. My child. I can't even.

[cville]

1. She told me she was "assigned" the job of "writing workshop helper" at school, which entailed going around the room to children who raised their hands and helping them to sound out words or write their letters. I was so proud. Yeah. Turns out she made up that job entirely and just went rogue and was doing other kids' work for them because she was (a) already finished, (b) bored, and (c) a know it all. Apple does not fall far. Her teacher is going to make the position official, but give her alternative tasks that don't involve doing other kids' work for them.

2. She just mounted a ten minute long argument for why fig newtons aren't cookies and therefore should count as part of her dinner and NOT as dessert.

3. Her uncle sent her this stuffed osprey as a present. I asked her if she could smile with it. She said "no no no, I'll look at it with eyes of love instead." Behold:
***

[pantsparty]

OMG LOL! I am totally in her corner on the Fig Newtons. Stop trying to be cookies!

[isabel]

Fig newtons are gross.

I am lol at the classroom helper thing.

[atlas]

Helping kids with spelling and writing, my kind of kid!

[panicfoot]

I can't say with certainty, but I'm pretty sure your child is smarter than me.

[lilafowler]

Ellie makes a similar smarmy face. ❤️❤️❤️

[cville]

Dec 18, 2015 19:36:30 GMT -5 panicfoot said:

I can't say with certainty, but I'm pretty sure your child is smarter than me.

Than me as well.

[Eagles]

I'm pretty confident that she'll be POTUS in a few decades.

[venice2007]

Lol @ the school thing!!!!
For sure on the newtons. They aren't cookies. They are fruit and bread ( that's what I tell myself)

[franklin]

The girl knows what she wants and how to get things done!

[miniroller]

I love her!!!
(& she's definitely your child- Good Luck!)

[lilibet]

You are in so much trouble when she's older, lol. But I love that she knows what she wants.

[emsumm]

She sounds awesome :-)

[scottyderp]

"Eyes of love"? This kid is perfect for ML!

[Deleted]

Love this!
Sounds like my DD in a few years

[gummybear]

She sounds awesome!!!

[sark]

Dec 18, 2015 19:39:34 GMT -5 bricco said:

Hahaha.. this is awesome. She sounds like a smart cookie fig newton for sure.

Sorry, couldn't resist! 

[1confused1]

This is amazing.

[cville]

Update, the Christmas story, according to L, being raised by an agnostic and a Jewish guy: "Santa Claus's dad is God, his real name is Jesus, and he was born on a farm."

Eta: and his mom is a fairy.

I. Am. Dying. I was hysterical when she told us this.

[lilafowler]

Dec 18, 2015 21:18:01 GMT -5 cville said:

Update, the Christmas story, according to L, being raised by an agnostic and a Jewish guy: "Santa Claus's dad is God, his real name is Jesus, and he was born on a farm."


I. Am. Dying. I was hysterical when she told us this.

I kind of want to tell this to mil when we see her next week. But she would have a stroke and die.

[lilafowler]

Ellie is raised by one half ass horrible Catholic (me) and H. I told him the other day I was concerned because she's going to be old enough for CCD next year and I didn't know how much of the junk stuff I wanted her to catch and H was all "Whaaaaaa?"
Fuck

[cville]

Dec 18, 2015 21:19:30 GMT -5 lilafowler said:

Dec 18, 2015 21:18:01 GMT -5 cville said:

Update, the Christmas story, according to L, being raised by an agnostic and a Jewish guy: "Santa Claus's dad is God, his real name is Jesus, and he was born on a farm."


I. Am. Dying. I was hysterical when she told us this.

I kind of want to tell this to mil when we see her next week. But she would have a stroke and die.

I want to get it cross stitched in a design with a fancy wreath. For the holidays.

[lovelyshoes]

She is adorable. I love that she found how to keep busy when she was bored! Priceless!

[livinitup]

When I was "a, b, and c" in school, the best I could manage was talking too much. Which showed-up on my report card, which brought shame, and made it impossible for my mother to displace it on the fridge.

I never thought to assign myself a workshop duty.


Don't crush this. Think of the scholarship opportunities if you can harness it !!

[eclaires]

LOL @ the classroom helper. That is legit the best!

Dec 18, 2015 21:21:39 GMT -5 lilafowler said:

Ellie is raised by one half ass horrible Catholic (me) and H. I told him the other day I was concerned because she's going to be old enough for CCD next year and I didn't know how much of the junk stuff I wanted her to catch and H was all "Whaaaaaa?"
Fuck

My kids are also being raised by one HAC (my family's term for half ass Catholic). Jackson goes to religious Ed and Scarlett goes to preschool at our church. They both still think Adam and Eve were naked because they are mermaids. They also have some very interesting theories about Jesus and God. I think it's hilarious so I don't bother correcting them, lol. My entertainment is pretty high on my priority list!

[livinitup]

Dec 18, 2015 21:21:39 GMT -5 lilafowler said:

Ellie is raised by one half ass horrible Catholic (me) and H. I told him the other day I was concerned because she's going to be old enough for CCD next year and I didn't know how much of the junk stuff I wanted her to catch and H was all "Whaaaaaa?"
Fuck

Don't worry. My DD just did 1st Holy Communion this year. If you ask her about it, she says some version of, "Because God loves us.* "



*real Catholic in training. Plus, there is Pope Francis. ❤️

[cuddlyevil]

Dec 18, 2015 21:22:00 GMT -5 cville said:

Dec 18, 2015 21:19:30 GMT -5 lilafowler said:

I kind of want to tell this to mil when we see her next week. But she would have a stroke and die.

I want to get it cross stitched in a design with a fancy wreath. For the holidays.

You should, then bring it out when she brings her college boyfriend home for the first time.

[textbookcase]

I love her. I think she and K would get along swimmingly.

[Deleted]

I want to congratulate you on posting this as an unabashed brag, and not even trying to bragplaint (cough Nikki Klein cough) it. Your daughter is awesome.

[WOT?*]

Dec 18, 2015 21:22:00 GMT -5 cville said:

Dec 18, 2015 21:19:30 GMT -5 lilafowler said:

I kind of want to tell this to mil when we see her next week. But she would have a stroke and die.

I want to get it cross stitched in a design with a fancy wreath. For the holidays.

Jermys - if you ever draw cville in a SS.
I wish you had posted each of these separately so I could like them all. Too bad ProBoards allows only one like per post because these are all awesome.