Post by Kcthepouchh8r on Jan 14, 2016 16:58:48 GMT -5
So my grandparents are up there in age. They have a gigantic house (to me anyway;houses here are generally older and small)--3500+ Sq ft (not including fully finished basement with full bath), five bedrooms, 3 baths. A few months ago my grandfather was expressing concern that they don't know who would take the house when he passes. My dad kind of brushed it off and said don't worry, the family would figure it out.
Today I was talking to my grandfather and he asked if I loved his big house. I said of course I did, yadda yadda yadda. I saw the little lightbulb go off in his head that he was going to leave the house to me. The issue is I don't like big houses. At all.
Wwyd? Take the house out of respect to your grandparents and suck it up? Give it to someone else after they passed? Tell them you didn't want it?
Also am I the only one who finds no appeal in large houses?
In a helpful answer, DH will inherit MIL's house when she dies. It's probably not a house we would ever live in but we'll deal with it. Rent it out probably.
If it would give your grandfather peace of mind to will it to you then what's the harm? After he passes you can always give it to another family member or sell it. Or rent it.
Totally agree this is a weird question. Do whatever you want with the house after they're gone, but don't tell them no. For all you know they want you to have it so they can go knowing it will be taken care of. Old people are sentimental like that.
I understand your dilemma, actually. I picture myself in your shoes, and if I thought my Grandpa might leave the house to me, I'd be pretty sure that he'd be doing it in the hope it would be "well taken care of" by a loved one. If I knew I had no intention of doing that and would end up just renting it out or selling it, I would feel incredibly guilty not saying anything about it now.
What I would probably do is have my dad feel it out with my grandpa and basically find out what his plans are. If he did indeed want to leave it to me, I would have a heart-to-heart with my grandpa and let him know that while I do like the house very much, it just wouldn't be a good fit for me and my family to live in. Then I'd take it from there based on his reaction. I would of course hope he wouldn't be too disappointed, but I don't think I could live with myself if I just took the house and then went and sold it after he passed without knowing what his wishes were.
My grandparents gifted me a condo (well technically the equity). We were already renting it from them but I didn't really want it for several reasons. I asked if they saw us living in it forever or renting it out because we definitely were not in a great place. I had been laid off from my teaching job and was running an income daycare while dh finished grad school and worked two jobs. They promised there were no strings attached and we could do whatever we wanted with it. Two years later we realized that the value had increased significantly and if we sold it we could afford to buy something with a better layout and a bigger yard. They were one of the first people we called when we decided to list it. It was the most awkward conversation. My grandparents were pissed and offended but told us it was our house to do what we wanted.
Of course, since your grandparents will be gone you won't have to deal with their thoughts on it but if it would bother you to know they had planned for you to live there forever and you don't plan to then say something.
Post by chatterbox on Jan 14, 2016 18:46:43 GMT -5
I would just be upfront with them if they end up offering it to you and then let them make the decision. You are putting the cart way in front of the horse!
I could see why some people wouldn't like a big house. Everything is more expensive like heating/cooling, furnishing, remodeling, etc. Plus there is more to clean. Personally, after living in small apartments for 10 years, I'd love all the space! Plus, it would be a free house!
I would tell grandpa that it's to difficult to make sure nobody is stealing an unauthorized red delicious apple in a big house, so I couldn't possibly take the house he hasn't yet offered me
To be honest, I would love any fucking house that was offered to me for free. I can't tell if you are really that assholeish or this is a very thinly veiled brag that you may or may not inherit a "gigantic house".
I've lived in tiny apartments and tiny houses for so long that I would love to have more room. If somebody gave me a house it would be life-changing, whatever I decided to do with it, and I'd be grateful. If they offered and I didn't think I would live there, I would tell them. I wouldn't feel right about selling a house if I thought it was intended for me to keep it in the family. Maybe someone else will really want to live there.
I don't love giant houses, but the way you're wording this sounds very ungrateful. One of my family members is essentially homeless at this point, and the family would give anything to have ANY kind of housing to offer. I get why you're asking, but it does come of as a little insensitive/entitled.
In all seriousness, I would personally take the house and either use it or sell it. How wonderful and generous to be considered for something so major. H and I would likely rent it out since we would like to acquire more rental properties. Maybe you could keep it as an investment if it's not your style.
Post by dizzycooks on Jan 14, 2016 21:13:11 GMT -5
Free house, bigger than the one I own. Yes please. I could make it work as long as the schools weren't atrocious. In which case I'd shut up, take it, say thank you and sell it to buy myself a bigger house in a location i prefer.
But for an answer, unless you have X-ray vision {which with your grocery budget, I doubt you could afford enough carrots to make your vision THAT good} you didn't see a lightbulb go off and if he didn't actually offer, this is just a bullshit #humblebrag drama llama post.
But for an answer, unless you have X-ray vision {which with your grocery budget, I doubt you could afford enough carrots to make your vision THAT good} you didn't see a lightbulb go off and if he didn't actually offer, this is just a bullshit #humblebrag drama llama post.