Still traumatized a week later how to do you deal

[sassycat]

This may be a  bit long so sorry and if you get to the end there is a big ole GBCN cookie for ya

So..  I am sitting in my apt last Sat just chilling with my cat.   I am starting to smell  some weird smell and think I stupidly left something on the stove and it was burning.   UM no.

The next thing I know  I have a guy shouting fire fire pounding on my door.  I open it up and BOOM  wall of fucking smoke, I am thinking holy shit what the fuck do I grab and how the hell am I going to navigate with my cat in this black hole of a hallway.    (  I am actually supposed to go on my balcony as I can't navigate stairs quickly and firefighters are to rescue me from there)   I can't go on my balcony as the smoke is billowing from my neigbhours house into mine so smoke would have been too much.     

I make it down the stairs  smoke inhalation and all,  I am ok, but fucking terrified.

Well  now here comes the trauma part of all of this if that wasn't enough.  The guy next door was cooking drugs in his bathroom ( hash oil)  and blew the fucking thing up.   Yep blew his bathroom to smithereens.   I am very thankful of this as if he did it in the kitchen, I would not be here to write about this. 
He is severely injured  burnt his face, hands, and stomach.   Sad but fuck man he put my life in danger and the lives of the other tenants.    I find out after all the investigations that he had an AK 40 with ammo,  and another handgun with ammo, a boatload of weed  and oil.  Plus 30 cans of butane that could have exploded as well.

I have had nightmares all week about not being able to get out of my apt safely,  someone coming after the rest of his stash and coming after me with a gun.   It is unreal   TERRIFYING.

Yes I have asked to be moved to another apt,  and moving altogether, but my finances are not the greatest to be able to come up with first last and security.

Other than seeing my dr to get over this  are there any other suggestions to  help me cope with this.  

THANKS FOR READING  AND A BIG OLE gbcn COOKIE has burned in the oven.


 

[vamoose]

That sounds terrifying. I think everything you are feeling is very normal. Will they be able to move you within your complex soon? I'm sure my anxiety would be through the roof, too. That is a lot to process.

[ginger]

I would look into seeing a cognitive behavioral therapist.

I'm so sorry. I think your feelings are completely normal and it's okay to reach out for help on how to cope.

[sookie]

Are you wanting to move within the complex or to a new one? I would hope they wouldn't charge you first, last, and a deposit within the same complex.

I think all of your feelings are completely rational given the trauma you went through. See if your insurance will cover a therapist and start there with someone to talk to and help sort through everything. They might be able to give you some coping mechanisms.

[cuddlyevil]

Sounds normal, but I think reaching out for help is a good idea.

I am sorry that you went through that.

[curtains]

Oh my gosh!! I am sorry, that is scary. Definitely go see someone if you can. I think anyone would have ptsd after that.

I am glad you are ok

[Deleted]

Our police and fire departments have victims services you can talk to, maybe yours had the same?

And maybe Red Cross has a program or knowledge of one that can help you move

[sassycat]

Thanks, I have certainly asked about a transfer and have heard nothing yet. It is really terrifying to comprehend what could have happened.

I am being very diligent about this and hoping it works out. Seeing my dr next week and hoping he can give me some other coping techniques.

[YeahSure]

How terrifying! I'm pretty sure every normal human being would be feeling exactly the same way. Seek help if it continues, but this JUST happened, and it's a major thing. It will take time. Sending virtual hugs.

[pedanticwench]

I'm so sorry you had such a traumatic experience. One way I would cope, personally, is to have plan in place for next time.

[7costanza]

How scary! Does your employer have an EAP? Or sometimes EAPs also cover family members so if a sibling, parent or cousin has one you could call them as well. I'm so glad you made it out ok!

[achi]

I'm so sorry that happened to you. That is terrifying.

[sassycat]

Jan 30, 2016 12:12:27 GMT -5 pedanticwench said:

I'm so sorry you had such a traumatic experience. One way I would cope, personally, is to have plan in place for next time.

I actually had a plan as it was just to go to my balcony  to get rescued, but in this I was completely unable to do that.  Thanks so much for the thoughts.     I am a big person on having things in place, but this time I had to really think on my feet.   

[joy]

Jan 30, 2016 12:06:30 GMT -5 sassycat said:

I am being very diligent about this and hoping it works out. Seeing my dr next week and hoping he can give me some other coping techniques.

Oh my goodness, how awful!  I'd be having some problems after all of that happening, too.  ::hugs::

I second the behavioral therapist idea, though.  Your doctor (GP, I'm assuming?) will be able to help symptoms, but truly calming nerves and putting your head back into a more grounded state is going to take longer and more specialized help.  The sooner you reach out, the faster you'll begin to heal.  Definitely ask your GP for a recommendation.

[sassycat]

No EAP coverage here unfortunately. I am on a disability pension, so not a lot of extra money for that. I am also going to go to the headoffice of our housing company to see if they can offer something to me as well.

[sassycat]

There are people that are telling me to just get over it, you weren't injured and it is over now. I know I wasn't injured much, but the trauma of what happened within 2 feet of my door is not something I can just get over. I was thinking I just should and be thankful I am ok and move on but it isn't that easy.

[joy]

Jan 30, 2016 12:24:31 GMT -5 sassycat said:

There are people that are telling me to just get over it, you weren't injured and it is over now. I know I wasn't injured much, but the trauma of what happened within 2 feet of my door is not something I can just get over. I was thinking I just should and be thankful I am ok and move on but it isn't that easy.

Don't listen to those people.  It's very easy to be flippant over a situation that you never felt.  People have feelings and fears and stress from incidents.  This is normal.  You take the steps that you need to do in order to make yourself feel safer and calmer.  If it's interfering with your every day life - regardless of what it is - then you take action, which is exactly what you're doing.  People who dismiss these fears are not helpful.  Being glad you weren't hurt is only one aspect of this situation - to say you should just be grateful for that is to ignore a constellation of other things that are part and parcel with this incident.

[venice2007]

Holy crap! I'm so glad you are ok! Xo

[Deleted]

Jan 30, 2016 12:21:44 GMT -5 sassycat said:

No EAP coverage here unfortunately. I am on a disability pension, so not a lot of extra money for that. I am also going to go to the headoffice of our housing company to see if they can offer something to me as well.

Call the fire department and ask if they have anyone on staff you could talk to

[sassycat]

I have a friend on the fire dept and he is on my list to call as well. I am sure someone has something out there to help deal with this.

Thanks again for all the kind words and it is very appreciated. I am not a great poster as I kill most threads I participate in so I don't create a lot of threads, but this time I just needed an extra eye or ear to see or think of things I have not.

[tripleshot]

That's terrifying! I think all you're going through is normal. Do the owners of your complex have other complexes you could move to w/o a security deposit? I'm glad you're okay.

[Eagles]

Holy shit, and thank God you're okay. I think I would be feeling the same. I hope that your doctor can help you.

[JayhawkGirl]

Jan 30, 2016 12:24:31 GMT -5 sassycat said:

There are people that are telling me to just get over it, you weren't injured and it is over now. I know I wasn't injured much, but the trauma of what happened within 2 feet of my door is not something I can just get over. I was thinking I just should and be thankful I am ok and move on but it isn't that easy.

Those people are fools. This is not a "just get over it" situation. I'm sorry this happened to you and I would be very unsettled and angry and scared if it had happened to me. I am glad you are okay from the fire. You will be okay from the aftershock but that will take time.

[toutsuite]

Omg. I wouldn't be able to say there. I would look for other places to live that are adorable. Even if it takes a few months to save to get there, it will be worth it to put your mind at ease. Getting an apartment in the same building and/ or neighborhood will always give you that association. Your need a clean break.

[mrsukyankee]

Glad you are okay.  I can suggest a good self-help CBT site that might help you: www.getselfhelp.co.uk/selfhelp.htm

I'm a CBT therapist and have suggested this for people who either can't afford treatment or can't get in to see someone due to their issues.  It does seem to help.  Hugs!

[sugarbear]

Omg. How scary. I'm so sorry this happens to you.

[sassycat]

TY mrsukyankee I appreciate that I will check it out.

Again thanks ladies, you are all always full of wisdom and compassion it is very much appreciated.

I am glad that it isn't just me thinking I am crazy.

[nursewife]

See a therapist. The more you talk about this and get those feelings out, the less chance it will manifest into something worse.

[lilac05]

That does sound terrifying! Screw the people who tell you that you should just get over it.

You should be very proud of yourself! You had (have) a plan in place. When that plan didn't work, you were able to think of a different way to handle the situation to keep you safe. Your body cooperated to make that happen for you. AND you are being proactive in recognizing your emotions and physical and emotional needs afterwards. That's all really great!

Are you getting assistance with smoke damage, too? My understanding is that you can't just wash stuff after a fire like you normally would. (Well, you CAN, obviously, but it doesn't take out all of the smoke stuff.)

I hope you're able to get a different place and start feeling more comfortable very soon!

[sassycat]

Jan 30, 2016 16:44:40 GMT -5 lilac05 said:

..
Are you getting assistance with smoke damage, too? My understanding is that you can't just wash stuff after a fire like you normally would. (Well, you CAN, obviously, but it doesn't take out all of the smoke stuff.)

I hope you're able to get a different place and start feeling more comfortable very soon!

They did come in and wash down walls with stuff, and had blowers in the hallways for days.  My house is ok  as it was just my hallway area so I was quite lucky.   

I do hope they will work with me as I could be not very nice if I wanted to.  lol