Update: I have job interview tomorrow.

[cjcouple]

So I have some career changes coming soon. I am a project asst for a construction management company. My current project is wrapping up. Most everyone is gone on to another project BUT I realistically have a few months of paperwork to wrap up. Anyway, after that I have no idea where I am going. I have heard through the grapevine I will be offered a promotion/raise but it would involve relocating 2 hrs away. Uprooting family. Dh could transfer at work so thats not a problem there.

But I saw this listing for another company (Architect) so I sent resume and have an interview tomorrow. It's a 50 to 55 min commute though. Yuck.

My thought was to go see what they offer. And possibly use to weigh relocation if needed. I don't know what the point of this post is but to just write things out because I am anxious. And of course it is super dry here so my face is a mess for interview tomorrow. Grrrr

I wish things could just stay the same. I have a nice 30 min commute, work for a good company, settled in location we are at. Boy's are thriving in school. B is making great progress. I don't want things to change wahhhhh

Update: Well the job interview went really well. I really liked the team and felt super comfortable. In fact, they asked me to come back to meet another person. She said it definitely isn't another interview, just coffee, tour the office and to make the drive one more time to see how I feel.  Unfortunately, that is the only bad thing about this job.  It is just under an hour's drive(no traffic though and alternate routes for accidents).  Reality is, I will most likely not find anything in my field around my area.  It will be an adjustment, home much later but they are open to flex shift of 7-4 so still getting boys by 5 - 3 nights a week. 2 weekdays my husband is off.

I also spoke with my current exec about the relocation and it wasn't exactly what I was expecting.  No promotion or raise. bummer.  So I am left confused and frustrated.  I hate this!     

[gastro]

Sounds like you don't want to move so I would keep looking since you have a few months till the current job ends. And this interview will at the very least be good practice or it might end up being something great so nothing to loose by going to it.
DH refuses to commute so we've been living in a small rental cottage right by his office during the week. Our house is only 25 miles away but with the traffic can take over an hour. Commutes can suck the life out of you.

[Deleted]

Good luck, CJ! All I can say is commuting is a big decision. I commute about 45-50 minutes each way (without traffic) and while it's not easy, it's worth it for the job I have. I suggest going in with an open mind and seeing what they have to offer. If they really want your skills, they might even be open to telecommuting 1 day a week which could ease the commute. Either way gl!

[lexus]

Good luck! I would go in with an open mind. Who knows if they will be open to telecommuting!

[cjcouple]

Thanks ladies. I really don't want to move. It's a lot of work and to uproot Brayden is a huge decision. BUT the relocation area has better schools and really good reputation as a community. So it is definitely a good option.

I do know commuting is tough. I used to commute 1.5 hrs each way for work and did so for 5 yrs. Before that I did 1 hr/way for an additional 5 yrs. However, that was driving into Boston. This none would be heading toward Hartford but I would be getting off just as traffic starts to build up. But no guarantees with accidents and traffic patterns so it's a big decision.

Honestly, If it weren't for B and his progress and comfort level with overcoming his selective mutism. I would move without question. Its a wondergul opportunity for my career with lots of room to grow. But if he were to regress to being non-verbal over a move, I would turn it down. I can't go back to him not speaking. Nothing is worth that.

[Deleted]

Good luck!! It's worth it to see what's out there so you have some options, or know for sure that relocating is the best option. I hope it all goes well!

[nowa]

Good luck CJ! As you said, at the very least the interview practice will be good. and it will probably help you figure out what you want your next steps to be.

[cjcouple]

Bump

[Katiedid]

Sounds like all went well! I'd take the job. Having a commute is an adjustment but it doesn't take long to get used to it. Are you driving 60 miles or back roads that take an hour to get there? I find there's a huge difference between the number of miles driven.

[cjcouple]

Feb 4, 2016 9:03:23 GMT -5 Katiedid said:

Sounds like all went well! I'd take the job. Having a commute is an adjustment but it doesn't take long to get used to it. Are you driving 60 miles or back roads that take an hour to get there? I find there's a huge difference between the number of miles driven.

Mostly highway but they are not interstates so pretty quiet. There are some back roads as an alternate route but about 8-10 min longer that way. Plus there are a few different exits I could take if there were backups.  I actually think, I could probably shave 5-10 minutes off. I did go exactly 65mph because I need new tires and wheel shakes above 65 right now.  If I took this new job, I would look into a nice basic commuter car and I typically drive 70-75 so I think I could do commute in 50 mins easily. Right now I do 30 min and don't mind that at all. It's a nice wind down from work.    

[cjcouple]

Feb 4, 2016 9:18:36 GMT -5 @mama2b said:

Did your current exec clarify that your job would be moving 2 hours away? If so, I would not move if there wasn't a promotion/raise. An hour commute is not ideal, but they sound family oriented given they are open to the flexible schedule. I would be leaning towards the new company. Good luck with your decision!

Thanks - yes. He spoke with me about my role there (Admin on steroids - his words) which is basically the same as I do now. He said they would love to keep me, I have a lot of potential, etc. Then he talked about the areas up that way to look into for relocation. He was very honest and said that project is 3 yrs long and he can't give me a guarantee on where they would have work after that but typically they get work around the city where our main office is. I knew this though. It's all just part of the construction industry.  I did get a big raise in January for the work I do now.

The other people in my role do a fraction of the work I do.  The Project Engineer said I do so much more than the typical Asst and my PX knows this and he fought for a big raise for me because of my skill set last summer and they gave to me first of the year. They absolutely value me and they are family oriented(Family/employee owned company).  They are a good company. I just thought they were offering me a different position so was bummed.       


      

[lexus]

I would take the new job. You mentioned the possibility of dh transferring. Could you move this summer to shorten your commutes? Then your sons could finish out the year at their current school and your quality of life would improve.

[quesyrah]

Given the update- I would take the new job. Relocation with no financial incentive? No. Would you get a relocation package? If not, then definitely no. If you're going to uproot your family then there needs to be something in it for you.
ETA- with no raise or other incentive (bonus, promotion, relo package) the only reason I would do it is if I couldn't afford to lose my job and it was my only option for keeping a roof over my head. If you can afford a job hunt in the event you don't get the new job, I just wouldn't do it.

[nowa]

Bummer about your current employer but I'd take the new job if it's officially been offered. And I'd ask for the 7-4 before officially accepting. And also- congrats on being awesome! You've got 2 jobs to pick from!

[Deleted]

Ah congrats! 7-4 is a great schedule, that's what I do and have a similar commute and you get used to it. Also it's nice to start your day early!!

Gl with whichever you choose to do

[cjcouple]

Thanks all - it helps writing it all out to process.

To answer questions above
mamabear Google maps says it's 53 miles (55 min)
@mama2b My dh is no help - lol. I don't think he is thrilled with either option to be honest. He doesn't want to move but also is nervous about me commuting so far. Last time I commuted 1.5+ hours each way it was too much and I couldn't handle it. Right now, I work 7-3 and 30 minutes home but home by 3:30-3:45 at the latest so it's an extra 2 hours a day between hour and the commute.

lexus that's actually a good point. I was only thinking relocating for my current job. But if I did the drive (new job) for another year and a half that puts both boys moving into a new school anyway if the drive gets too tedious. Or even gives me time to look on the southern side of my town and potentially could shave 10 min off my drive. But would keep boys in same school district. It might be a possibility to relocate within my current area to lighten the load eventually or even move closer after a while.