Random acts of kindness & social media.

[Moe]

I'm usually all sappy and joyful about the random acts of kindness.

Oddly enough, today I saw an article about a guy posting his RAoK giving a $100 tip to a waitress he thought was a single parent in a Chinese restaurant, and I don't know why but I got irritated.

Ok, maybe it's the whole "here's what *I* am doing, praise me" and the fact he's foreign to me.

But when my friends do any RAoK, my heart melts.

Truth but no logic. Like a Picasso.

[panicked]

Done!

I'm strictly in the "random AND QUIETLY DONE WITHOUT FANFARE acts of kindness" mindset.

[lilac05]

Now I want Del Taco! It's been FAR too long.

I think so much of my response to posting Random Acts of Kindness depends on who posted it and the wording used. I can't put my finger on it, but sometimes the postings are "Look at ME!!!!!" and other times it's a nice "spread the love" reminder.

[cleo29]

I took. I know I have posted on here before about this topic. For me, my reaction has more to do with the tone of the post, not sure that makes sense.

I am not against posting doing something positive for someone, especially a strange, because I do think it reminds or inspires others to do the same, which is fantastic. I also like it when people share what they witness.

[cleo29]

Mar 19, 2016 20:09:10 GMT -5 Moe said:

I'm usually all sappy and joyful about the random acts of kindness.

Oddly enough, today I saw an article about a guy posting his RAoK giving a $100 tip to a waitress he thought was a single parent in a Chinese restaurant, and I don't know why but I got irritated.

Ok, maybe it's the whole "here's what *I* am doing, praise me" and the fact he's foreign to me.

But when my friends do any RAoK, my heart melts.

Truth but no logic. Like a Picasso.

You put it better than I did. I think there are people who do it, in part, to get that pat on the back for being a great person.

I don't know, it makes me feel strange.

[Deleted]

I took it. If someone else is posting about something someone else did, that's awesome. If the person post about something they did, it pisses me off and makes me think they are fishing for back pats.

[Moe]

Mar 19, 2016 20:11:33 GMT -5 mp said:

Mar 19, 2016 20:09:10 GMT -5 Moe said:

I'm usually all sappy and joyful about the random acts of kindness.

Oddly enough, today I saw an article about a guy posting his RAoK giving a $100 tip to a waitress he thought was a single parent in a Chinese restaurant, and I don't know why but I got irritated.

Ok, maybe it's the whole "here's what *I* am doing, praise me" and the fact he's foreign to me.

But when my friends do any RAoK, my heart melts.

Truth but no logic. Like a Picasso.

Have you taken my survey? lol. 

If you have - 

SPOILER: Click to show

 
I put some a/b testing regarding people you know versus people you don't. Because I wonder the same thing.

I am not a survey setter upper for a living, so I can't say this will be worthy of much other than scratching some itches! lol.

I did (shit, now I am wondering if I skipped over this).

SPOILER: Click to show

I was positive!!!! (except one that I didn't understand too much, and had to reread (the last one).

[lindyanne]

I follow a 'feel good' type page on fb and love seeing those on there but they're pretty anonymous. I love doing RAoK but I would never post one on social media unless something really sweet happened and I was super touched by it or something.

[onomatopoeia]

Mar 19, 2016 20:20:21 GMT -5 @kittensandkazoozles said:

I took it. If someone else is posting about something someone else did, that's awesome. If the person post about something they did, it pisses me off and makes me think they are fishing for back pats.

This is me.

I have a survey question.  When you ask about social media, that doesn't include GBCN does it?  (I don't think that's considered social media but I'm not sure?)  I'm only friends with people I actually know on FB, but I've never met anyone here.  I answered as if it only meant sites like FB.

Interesting survey!

[FastHands]

Mar 19, 2016 20:11:22 GMT -5 lilac05 said:

Now I want Del Taco! It's been FAR too long.

I think so much of my response to posting Random Acts of Kindness depends on who posted it and the wording used. I can't put my finger on it, but sometimes the postings are "Look at ME!!!!!" and other times it's a nice "spread the love" reminder.

Off-topic, but what do you like at del taco? One just opened near me.

[birdistheword]

I also agree that my reaction has a lot to do with who is doing the posting. Someone who is genuinely nice and I know they are just sharing something positive? That's cool. Someone who is generally an attention whore? It's going to annoy me.

[MixedBerryJam]

I supposed it's judgy on my part, and I'm trying to be less judgy for Lent (so, thanks for the eternal damnation in my afterlife, mp. See if I ever do anything randomly kind for you!) but I sort of think it stops being a raok and starts being an aw when you post about it on social media. Why else post it (except, maybe the kid story, but even that sounds a little "look what a good mother I am!")?

[wambam]

I don't want to hear first persona accounts of what they did for someone. I don't mind third person stories.

[Moe]

Mar 19, 2016 20:47:12 GMT -5 @kirkette said:

Mar 19, 2016 20:19:19 GMT -5 mp said:

I am of the opinion that sharing may inspire others to do good things, and to think creatively. Hell, even if it's a "keeping up with the Joneses" type of thing, who cares if it's spreading good that we're trying to one up each other on? lol

Yup, and fundraisers (on behalf of their  donors at all levels) publicize gifts, and attempt to use donor peer pressure for good all the time. If it creates more good will, I rarely care.

The one exception is when people take, and publish, personal photos with homeless clients. That gets a no from me because most homeless outreach orgs flat out forbid things of that nature.   

The philanthropy world is currently evaluating this tactic, and focusing on other methods (right now storytelling is all the rage) mostly because it's been seen as unsustainable and not attracting new donors.

That said, like I mentioned, it's still used.  Fazed out, hopefully.  It's not about donor pressure, but rather tapping into empathy and action.

Here's hoping.

[Moe]

Mar 19, 2016 20:57:46 GMT -5 @kirkette said:

Mar 19, 2016 20:49:36 GMT -5 Moe said:

The philanthropy world is currently evaluating this tactic, and focusing on other methods (right now storytelling is all the rage) mostly because it's been seen as unsustainable and not attracting new donors.

That said, like I mentioned, it's still used.  Fazed out, hopefully.  It's not about donor pressure, but rather tapping into empathy and action.

Here's hoping.

Oh no, the story telling is exhausting! I don't want to sit through, or skim a story, just to get to an ask.

However, I know I'm different than most donors. I'm cool with skipping the song and dance, and just having causes I like ask. I think this is from being on the other side for so many years. LOL 

Except you just said you get sappy at reading this sort of stuff i.e. storytelling!

It's more for new donors - if you're trying to target new donors, pressuring them seems to be unreliable, unsustainable, and just antiquated.  Not effective.

If you have an allegiance to a cause/specific charity, then usually you won't be easily pressured to give to another charity/cause, unless it moves you/it taps into your empathetic side - usually via storytelling.

If someone pressures you into an ask, you might give a donation, but you probably won't become a routine donor, i.e. too much money is spent on fundraising for you.

That's the power of storytelling.   Add social media/news & multiple outlets where expansive reach is easy/cheap, that's the better fundraising tool.

[lilac05]

Mar 19, 2016 20:31:44 GMT -5 FastHands said:

Off-topic, but what do you like at del taco? One just opened near me.

#4 with a Diet Coke.  Two chicken soft tacos & French fries.  Odd but amazing combo.  (Keep in mind that it's cheap fast food, so amazing is relative!)

[sugarbear]

Third person stories, or things that people witnessed? Love.

Stories like, here are the 50 lunch bags we packed spread over the kitchen of our McMansion, can't wait to show the children the spirit of Christmas as we wander downtown and hand these out to all those less fortunate? Hate.

[scottyderp]

I don't care if people are getting a high from it, or attention, as long as someone else is benefiting from it. It's a win-win if we're all feeling good. I love Starbucks and nice people!

[cville]

Mar 19, 2016 20:46:41 GMT -5 wambam said:

I don't want to hear first persona accounts of what they did for someone. I don't mind third person stories.

Yes. First person stories read less like random acts of kindness and more like calculated acts of self promotion.


Exceptions for the professional realm. If you work for a homeless outreach center, by all means please tell me about your personal, professional experiences with your programs. If you are a glory seeking soccer mom, STFU about when you gave that man on the corner $5 that time.

[insominac]

Sometimes seeing or hearing about people doing something good can inspire others. Like i saw this woman holding a baby standing outside a grocery store holding a help me sign. I offered to take her shopping and as I was walking in the meat section with her, a man sidled up to me and gave me a wad of cash to give to the woman. It was a really sweet gesture that took me completely by surprise.

[sofamonkey]

I marked negative for the del taco story. I think it's not kind to give the poor guy diarrhea.

The only back pat thing I do is once a year, right before school ends. I encourage people to consider donating to local food banks at that time because free breakfast and lunch is off the table for many kids. We usually do $10-15/week food donation during the summer, with things that a kid on their own can cook.

Otherwise, if I do good, it's personal and not for glory.