SNR: Speech Delay Eval Update

[mekia]

Sounds like you guys are on track- hope you guys get help if needed!

DS has his speech evaluation tomorrow too.

[rxbeth]

I hope the second half goes well and she gets the services she needs.

[Deleted]

Sounds like it went well and it sounds like you are on the right track.

I have heard of language delays causing issues in participation with other kids. But, like you said there are other concerns there too. And it certainly can't hurt to continue with the ASD eval.

[andwhat]

Glad you are on the right track. Hope you get her the help she needs.

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[Deleted]

Mar 31, 2016 12:08:03 GMT -5 swizz said:

Mar 31, 2016 12:06:16 GMT -5 @awinter said:

Sounds like it went well and it sounds like you are on the right track.

I have heard of language delays causing issues in participation with other kids. But, like you said there are other concerns there too. And it certainly can't hurt to continue with the ASD eval.

I do think the biting (she's been bitten about 5 times since starting daycare in mid-January) has to do with the speech delay. She's unable to really express herself and doesn't always play like the other kids, so she's been the recipient of the aggression more than the other kids. 

Poor kid! I would definitely agree with that. I think biting is a common thing kids resort to out of frustration. The girls don't have a language delay anymore but E can get really mad/frustrated sometimes and isn't always able to communicate it effectively. So she has bitten K when K takes her toy away a couple of times. K is definitely the dominant twin and is bossy and that's hard for E sometimes.

I could see other kids doing that if they are frustrated and c isn't able to communicate with them about why she is doing xyz etc.

[auntie]

I hope she gets some help around her speech delay and that you are able to get the ASD eval done soon. When will you have the IFSP meeting?

The description of her behavior in the classroom sounds very like what you expect of a child her age on spectrum the way the ED teacher phrased it.

I hear a lot of people ascribe all manner of behavior to speech delays, but I think it's more about the communication delay than being able to speak since about 65% of the information in common human interactions is strictly non-verbal. DS has a friend with apraxia who was not able to talk until he was in kindie. He was, however, very engaged with other kids. He played associatively and cooperatively with other kids and even had a true "best friend".

The biting is so sad. I wonder if she's getting a warning from the other child but is unable to recognize it as such. I know this was an issue with DS; he didn't seem to "learn from" exchanges with other kids in a way my much more socially savvy nieces could. It's a shame, because DS often brought out the worst in other kids because he didn't behave in ways they understood even though he was, an is, a remarkably verbal person. Like sentences at 16 months verbal. I remember once having him at a small fast food play place when he was about 17 months old. Some older girls wanted to order him around, but he wasn't cooperating. The older one, who was about 5, bit him when she thought no one was looking. He stood up, pointed at her and yelled "She bit me!". The little girl misjudged her victim to be pre-verbal; dad whisked her out of there. By bathtime, he looked like he'd had a run-in with a shark.

[lilac05]

I'm glad this session went well!

Cora's a lucky girl to have you as her mom. You're doing a great job identifying concerns and then following up on them with the appropriate professionals! Kudos to you! I know it isn't easy, but you're doing a fantastic job!

[kershnic]

I'm happy for you that you're finally making some progress in this crazy scavenger hunt for services. I think you're doing the right thing by pursuing the ASD evaluation and that is truly the way to address it if she does end up being diagnosed. You're doing a great job advocating for her!

[auntie]

@barefootbarista , said:

Can you give an example of a new wants that you are talking about? For example, if you pretend to cry will she come check you out? Or do you say ouch will she rub your arm?

Not sure this was directed at me but, here goes. 

DS attended a special reading lab school in another state for 2 1/2 years starting when he was 8. We carpooled with 2 other boys who were a bit older and even more feral than he was. FTR- I generally like kids; I've volunteered for years with scouts (camping, mentoring, leading) and was uniform mom for DS's old marching band- fun times. But these 3 were the unholy trinity and I always got stuck with the afternoon run when their meds had worn off (pre-Adderall and Concerta era meds tanked in 4-6 hours) and they were hungry, cranky and tired and just generally assholes. 

One day they really pissed me off; insults and fists were flying. I snapped at them, which is not my usual MO. The other two kids read something in my facial expression and tone of voice that was enough to stop their nonsense cold. DS didn't. It was remarkable to me at the time, that the one kid who had the most experience with my reactions to behavior and communication style did not pick up how angry I was, whereas the 2 boys who'd known me for maybe a month knew immediately to cease and desist. 

[auntie]

Mar 31, 2016 14:26:31 GMT -5 @barefootbarista said:

Mar 31, 2016 14:12:57 GMT -5 auntie said:

I've kind of perfected the stare down. Nora knows when she is fucking up, and I can give her a death ray look and she will cut it out. I think it's because I've been teaching HS so long.

Mine gets it now, but he had just started his MGW Thinking About You, Thinking About Me Social Thinking curriculum.

I remember the first time he caught on; he told me he could tell I was angry because my elevens were out. So kind.

[broadsheet]

Good luck to you. The waiting part is the worst - we were referred in July for an ASD eval and are still jumping through hoops and without a diagnosis. I hope you get some answers, and a plan of attack, soon.

[broadsheet]

swizz Yeah, it sucks but I'm a little more zen about it now. Cora reminds me a lot of my DD (her name is Claire) - she is always the tallest kid by far, which is hard because she is emotionally and socially more immature. (Like, she was obsessed with Baby Einstein for FAR too long and would still watch it now, if I let her.) She is also not empathetic and can be rather flat emotionally, which makes parenting a challenge often (it's hard to give and give and not really get much back, KWIM?)

Anyway, I don't know if we'll get an ASD or social communication disorder dx or what. I can say that now, nearing kindergarten, we are discovering more and more about her daily and it's cool to see what's underneath the surface with her.