It gets better!

[Deleted]

Backstory: last Friday, I met a guy at a bar/club, let's call him VD for Venezuelan Dancer. He thought I was so pretty he wanted to date me. Told me right away. I said I wasn't looking for a relationship at all. IMO, I could only see FWB potential. Nothing more. Didn't tell him that but made it clear I wasn't looking for a BF.
He texts me and we chat and we basically have the same conversation (he is very prolix about the subject which is annoying). I am like dude, you think too much, relax.

Today, I was back in the big city to go to the State Fair with some friends. We get back at my friend's house and I talk about VD. My friend tells me that if I want a FWB situation with VD I should do it bla bla bla. I am like no, the guy wants a serious relationship, it's asking for trouble. Why don't you meet him and tell me what you think about him? I text VD so we can meet at a bar. I let him pick a place and he gives me an address. I ask my friend to look up the address on his iPhone and when I see the map, I recognize the place VD gave us. :-|
That's the apartment complex where the xH moved to when he decided to leave. In an area with 3 million people, VD lives where my xH used to live. Bad sign! Plus dude is crazy if he thinks I am going to his place (and it's not safe).
We finally meet at a pub I picked and my guy friend is coming along with me. We have a drink, we talk and learn that VD "knows" my xH because their apartments were across each other. Weird!

To conclude, my guy friend was not impressed by VD. He told me he agreed with my first impression. VD wants something from me I am never going to give him so it's better we part ways.
On my drive home, VD calls me and tells me he really likes me. I stopped him right away and told him there would never be any chance of a relationship between us. He talked and talked but finally got the message. He concluded by "ok I understand goodbye" and hang up.

Geezzzzzzz all this drama and I've only met the guy last Friday. I am glad it's over :beer: .

[BlueBayou]

Way too weird , i also believe you dodged a big bullet!! That would've been a mess and a half!

[Deleted]

Sept 3, 2012 9:03:31 GMT -5 jellymankelly said:

I can't figure this out. Do you think he might have been some sort of scam artist? I can't imagine why he'd be that into you after JUST meeting you...I mean, I'm sure you're cute and everything, but that's strange behavior for a man.

He is not a scam artist. But he is 36 and wants to start a family bad. When he found out I was 30, single and not American, I guess I was the perfect person in his eyes. He doesn't want to date American girls because he sees them all the time at the bars getting drunk and going with other guys even if they are in a relationship or married.

[jojoandleo]

Sept 3, 2012 13:12:25 GMT -5 @landobiscuit said:

Sept 3, 2012 9:03:31 GMT -5 jellymankelly said:

I can't figure this out. Do you think he might have been some sort of scam artist? I can't imagine why he'd be that into you after JUST meeting you...I mean, I'm sure you're cute and everything, but that's strange behavior for a man.

He is not a scam artist. But he is 36 and wants to start a family bad. When he found out I was 30, single and not American, I guess I was the perfect person in his eyes. He doesn't want to date American girls because he sees them all the time at the bars getting drunk and going with other guys even if they are in a relationship or married.

^o) Dude sounds like a dick from this alone. As an American, I can say I do not go after men who are not my husband. Is he hanging out in college bars? Stereotyping is fun!

[lookingup]

Sept 3, 2012 13:51:51 GMT -5 jojoandleo said:

Sept 3, 2012 13:12:25 GMT -5 @landobiscuit said:

He is not a scam artist. But he is 36 and wants to start a family bad. When he found out I was 30, single and not American, I guess I was the perfect person in his eyes. He doesn't want to date American girls because he sees them all the time at the bars getting drunk and going with other guys even if they are in a relationship or married.

Dude sounds like a dick from this alone. As an American, I can say I do not go after men who are not my husband. Is he hanging out in college bars? Stereotyping is fun!

And how exactly would he know, just by looking at a drunk girl, whether she is in a relationship or married? (other than a wedding ring, which may or may not be a decoy)

[Deleted]

I'm totally confused by why you even engaged this guy in the first place. It's like you were just asking for drama/weirdness.

[Deleted]

Don't ask me why he thinks that about American girls. Who cares if it's true or not. That's just his opinion.

[jojoandleo]

Well, he's an asshole who is single because he is ignorant in his making assumptions and judging an ENTIRE COUNTRY by the acts of a few people. That's just my opinion, though.

[stephbfan]

If he dislikes American, then why is he living in America? 8-D I do think that when you are a foreigner living in another country, you do get to see some of the cultural differences but stereotyping is bad.

The stereotype is that Venezuelans are so freaking dumb. Ask him what he thinks about that.

[moolarkey]

Is your XH behind this?

[lookingup]

This whole thread just made me laugh. How terribly awkward.

[Deleted]

Hey ladies, don't get your panties in a twist. People have stereotypes. No matter where they are from.

Also huge LOL at the poster who thinks XH is behind this. Sorry to disappoint, it's just a coincidence. I met this guy at a bar I've never been before (and wasn't even planning on going to the bar that night) in a city 80 miles from where I live. It's a small world after all :::cue Disney song:::

[jojoandleo]

Sept 3, 2012 16:17:16 GMT -5 @landobiscuit said:

Hey ladies, don't get your panties in a twist. People have stereotypes. No matter where they are from.

^o) Oh, that makes it okay then. You are right, he's obviously not a judgmental doucheface. I hear some people are jumping off cliffs later today, maybe you should see if he wants to join! I mean, if other people are doing it...

Sorry, but I would NEVER consider dating a guy who told me "Oh, every woman from this particular country is a slut all over men in bars, so I would never date one." I don't tolerate bigots, though.

*Pulls panties from ass and walks out of thread*

[Deleted]

Sept 3, 2012 16:24:13 GMT -5 jellymankelly said:

You seem to be defending this guy hard core after making him out to look like a total creeper. What kind of reaction were you expecting?

Exactly...and I have to say it....told ya so!!

[stephbfan]

Sept 3, 2012 16:17:16 GMT -5 @landobiscuit said:

Hey ladies, don't get your panties in a twist. People have stereotypes. No matter where they are from.

Also huge LOL at the poster who thinks XH is behind this. Sorry to disappoint, it's just a coincidence. I met this guy at a bar I've never been before (and wasn't even planning on going to the bar that night) in a city 80 miles from where I live. It's a small world after all :::cue Disney song:::

People have stereotypes but judging people for that is not right. The stereotype I told you on my previous post was not just an example, it is indeed the one that people from Venezuela have. So following his train of thought, you should tell him that he is dumb and shallow and see how he reacts.

FWIW, I'm not from the US so this is not me feeling offended for what he said but as someone who had to live the annoyances of stereotyping, it really pisses me off.

[Deleted]

Sept 3, 2012 16:21:47 GMT -5 jojoandleo said:

Sept 3, 2012 16:17:16 GMT -5 @landobiscuit said:

Hey ladies, don't get your panties in a twist. People have stereotypes. No matter where they are from.

Oh, that makes it okay then. You are right, he's obviously not a judgmental doucheface. I hear some people are jumping off cliffs later today, maybe you should see if he wants to join! I mean, if other people are doing it...

Sorry, but I would NEVER consider dating a guy who told me "Oh, every woman from this particular country is a slut all over men in bars, so I would never date one." I don't tolerate bigots, though.

*Pulls panties from ass and walks out of thread*

I never said him stereotyping American women was OK 8-D What I am saying is that people will judge and I am not going to lose my time arguing with them about it. People in the US have a lot of stereotypes about me since I am from a different country. I just don't talk to them, don't hang out with them because they are idiots.
And I never considered dating this guy. He's just a random dude I met in a bar.

[jojoandleo]

Sept 3, 2012 16:35:17 GMT -5 @landobiscuit said:

I never said him stereotyping American women was OK What I am saying is that people will judge and I am not going to lose my time arguing with them about it. People in the US have a lot of stereotypes about me since I am from a different country. I just don't talk to them, don't hang out with them because they are idiots.
And I never considered dating this guy. He's just a random dude I met in a bar.

Well you certainly seemed to be defending him saying it doesn't matter, people stereotype, and to not get our panties in a twist. You COULD have just said, "Yeah, I know, what a douche!" Because, he is one.

[Deleted]

Sept 3, 2012 16:24:13 GMT -5 jellymankelly said:

You seem to be defending this guy hard core after making him out to look like a total creeper. What kind of reaction were you expecting?

LOL. I guess I am the worst advocate ever if this is seen as me defending him.
It seems pointless to get all mad on this stereotype thing when we ALL agree it's a stupid remark.

[Deleted]

Sept 3, 2012 19:16:06 GMT -5 @redvelvet29 said:

I am just wondering why you even met up with him at all? You wanted a FWB when he clearly told you he was interested in finding a serious relationship?

To tell him once and for all there was no chance between us. And that's what happened.

[jojoandleo]

This whole thread is really super weird. Where is BK with her Starbursts picture?

[Deleted]

Sept 3, 2012 19:41:30 GMT -5 @redvelvet29 said:

Sept 3, 2012 19:26:53 GMT -5 @landobiscuit said:

To tell him once and for all there was no chance between us. And that's what happened.

It seems so unnecessary to meet up with someone in person to tell them this. Especially since you live so far away. You could have just texted him. Or just not answered any calls from him.

You met him at a club on Friday, it's not like you were in any kind of relationship with him.. why the need to be so dramatic to meet up in person to reject him?

I was in the area like I said in my original post. So it only took me 5 mins to meet him. Nothing dramatic. He got the message and is over it. And he knew from the beginning this was my stance. So I didn't give him any false hope.

[jojoandleo]

[Deleted]

Hey, it's a forum where we talk about those kind of stuff. The more details the better.

And no, it's not dramatic as in I didn't drive 3 hours total to talk to the guy and tell him there was no chance like redvelvet implied. I saw in on a whim because I was in the area with a guy friend. And I am glad I did because he finally got the message. I was mostly surprised to learn he used to be xH's neighbor. But all is well. He hasn't contacted me since last night.

[blackkitty]

This post is weird so I thought I would bump it up!!!

[usedtobebear]

Sept 3, 2012 6:49:49 GMT -5 mintchocochip said:

Dude sounds like a nut case and a bullet dodged!

This!! :Y: