Codependency questions

[wingingitinmotown]

I'm going to bring this up in therapy today, but I'm just curious if others have come across this...

I'm reading Codependent No More to try to get past my issues with my mom's drinking. I'm doing a good job at "detaching" from her, but now I'm afraid that I'm "attaching" on to G in the process. We dated for 1.5 years before I moved here, and I never had these issues, but in the last couple of weeks, it's gotten bad. Worse than when I first moved here. This also coincides with when my mom started to go off the deep end (again) and I started therapy. Obviously I'm going to be working on stopping that because it SUCKS (for both of us), but is that a normal thing...when you quit the "addiction" to one person to latch on to another?

Also, in the book it says to "say and ask for what you want" from other people. But what if the codependent thoughts are still there, and you can't really tell which is a REAL want, and which is the manipulative want coming thought?

I'm hoping that this is all part of the recovery process and that it's normal, at least to a degree. More than that, I'm hoping that the fact that I'm aware of these things is a sign that I'm making some kind of progress, even if it's just baby steps. Am I hoping too much here?