Anyone take a leave of absence?

[pizzapizza]

PDQ

So thanks everyone yesterday for answering all my questions about leaving my job and future business opportunities.  I spoke with boss today and he recommended I look into taking a leave of absence.  He wants me to stay and totally gets where I am coming from.  I framed my quitting more about being stressed out with baby (who won't take a bottle), lack of sleep, and inability to focus and get stuff done, and being totally burnt out(which is all true). 

I eventually want to put DD2 in daycare (my mom has been watching her at my house) but was hoping to make it until she is about 1 years old.  With a leave of absence this would be feasible.  

After doing some more research about the kind of work I would pursue if I went out on my own I do think I may have a bigger gap in qualifications than I thought.  Additionally, we would likely be dipping into a little savings to make this happen (me quitting) which pains me as I am usually a super saver.

I think no matter what I should probably take the leave.   If anyone else has done this successfully or thinks this is a good/bad idea let me know.  Thanks!

[dancingirl21]

I didn't see your previous post. Would your job be protected? I assume you took FMLA (if available at your company) for the birth of your baby? That's something I would look into. Obviously if your boss suggested it, I assume it would be. But who would be taking over your responsibilities while you are out? Any chance they would change your job before you get back?

[pizzapizza]

Aug 11, 2016 19:49:01 GMT -5 dancingirl21 said:

I didn't see your previous post. Would your job be protected? I assume you took FMLA (if available at your company) for the birth of your baby? That's something I would look into. Obviously if your boss suggested it, I assume it would be. But who would be taking over your responsibilities while you are out? Any chance they would change your job before you get back?

PDQ

I do not think it would be protected, yes I already took FMLA.  This would be a personal leave.  We have contractors that would handle my job - we hired two to help support me in the deployment of a new project.  I was going to quit today so if there is no job when I get back then it isn't the end of the world.  My boss likes me I guess and the project is continuing through 2018 so there would be work. 

The only tricky part is I am driving the strategic part while the contractors were more focused on implementation.  So if the new folks don't do a great job while I am out it could be painful for me when I get back.  

[dancingirl21]

Okay. Based on your last answer, I guess it can't hurt if you were planning to leave anyway. If you came back after a LOA and still were not happy, you could leave then.

[pizzapizza]

Aug 11, 2016 19:55:58 GMT -5 mofongo said:

This isn't an option in my field, but if it's ok by your employer I'd do it. This would be completely uncompensated leave?

Yep no pay.  Essentially I would not be removed from company hr and I guess I could get my job back if it is still open.  It would take a long time for anyone to get up to speed with the position I am currently in. 

[luckyno7]

Could you work less hours weekly?

[pizzapizza]

Aug 11, 2016 20:19:31 GMT -5 luckyno7 said:

Could you work less hours weekly?

Potentially but then I don't get the mental break I think I need.  We also have the opportunity to go on some really cool trips that would probably not happen otherwise.  I also have trouble turning off my brain from work.  It is very annoying.

[noodleoo]

I don't think there is a downside to taking the LOA if you were ready to quit. Is there a fixed amount of time of the leave? I think at previous companies I worked at they had something about 4-6 week LOA in the handbook. I think I would take the LOA and then reevaluate how you feel at the end of the term about going back.

[pizzapizza]

Aug 11, 2016 20:38:56 GMT -5 noodleoo said:

I don't think there is a downside to taking the LOA if you were ready to quit. Is there a fixed amount of time of the leave? I think at previous companies I worked at they had something about 4-6 week LOA in the handbook. I think I would take the LOA and then reevaluate how you feel at the end of the term about going back.

This is where I am at.  I think it makes the most sense.  I will be interested to see how long I can take off.

[noodleoo]

Aug 11, 2016 20:44:21 GMT -5 pizzapizza said:

Aug 11, 2016 20:38:56 GMT -5 noodleoo said:

I don't think there is a downside to taking the LOA if you were ready to quit. Is there a fixed amount of time of the leave? I think at previous companies I worked at they had something about 4-6 week LOA in the handbook. I think I would take the LOA and then reevaluate how you feel at the end of the term about going back.

This is where I am at.  I think it makes the most sense.  I will be interested to see how long I can take off.

Good luck! In case it helps, I quit my job (that was long hours and I hated) after my maternity leave.  I ended up taking a year off and recently went back to work. It was the best decision for me! I needed the extra time and now I'm so happy to be working again. I really wish ML in the US was longer than 12 weeks, which is really not enough. 

(ETA: i know some people will judge that, but they screwed me pretty badly so I have no guilt over it.)

[pizzapizza]

Aug 11, 2016 20:48:19 GMT -5 noodleoo said:

Aug 11, 2016 20:44:21 GMT -5 pizzapizza said:

This is where I am at.  I think it makes the most sense.  I will be interested to see how long I can take off.

Good luck! In case it helps, I quit my job (that was long hours and I hated) after my maternity leave.  I ended up taking a year off and recently went back to work. It was the best decision for me! I needed the extra time and now I'm so happy to be working again. I really wish ML in the us was longer than 12 weeks, which is really not enough. 

(ETA: i know some people will judge that, but they screwed me pretty badly so I have no guilt over it.)

I am so with you on the extended maternity leave.  We women need to rise up!! Together!!!

[ijack]

I took leave for medical reasons and was protected under FMLA, so I think it's different than what you're discussing.

[anna7602]

I took a leave of absence from my last office job about a year before I finally quit. It was before pregnancy/baby because it's what was offered when I tried to quit. I came back and my duties were redefined a bit and some other minor things changed. While I still wasn't happy there, I got pregnant and ended up doing a lot of freelancing on the side to build up my own client network so that I could eventually focus on that if necessary. I returned after my ML and stuck it out until DD was almost a year old. Then I really quit and have been mainly working for myself since (although my old employer is a sometimes client of mine). 

During the leave itself, I did not do anything work-related. I spent six weeks traveling, doing a yoga retreat and a writing workshop in two different countries and exploring and hanging out with friends in different places in-between. But it was a good opp to soul search and convince myself that I really had to work harder at figuring out another career path. 

ETA: sorry, pizzapizza, it was almost two years before I finally quit. My math sucks. I took the leave of absence in June & July, had DD the following May and then in April of the year after she was born, I quit. 

[lolo]

My employer offered me an extended leave of absence when I told them I couldn't return after maternity leave. I was completely overwhelmed. My kid didn't sleep and would not eat or sleep at daycare. I would have returned to a position with huge amounts of travel while EBF with a bottle refuser.

I declined the leave because I didn't want them to hold the position for me any longer. I knew I would feel pressure to return and was very anxious that I still might not be ready at that point.

Eventually I reentered the workforce part time after J was a year old. My former employer is my top client (though I have others as well).

I echo noodleoo's comments on maternity leave length.

[pizzapizza]

Aug 11, 2016 21:21:23 GMT -5 @kirkette said:

Do you honestly want to go back?
We could take a year LOA, or sabbatical for whatever reason, but I knew I didn't want to go back back.
I didn't want to feel tied to the old employer.

I am honestly not sure at this point.  I think I  am so tired it clouding my judgement.  The bottle refusing is also making life significantly more difficult.  If those two things were in check I think I would be less miserable.  I love the flexibility of my job and I am working now to setup some really cool stuff if I can get it implemented properly.

 I should really go to bed now.

[HitchedIn2006]

I'm on a year parental leave after the birth of dd2. My boss doesn't want to hire anyone to replace me until my fmla runs out. Whatever- shitty for my coworkers. There is a temp in to help with phones/filing. I am not guaranteed my old job or department upon return, just a job and it could be at a different pay grade.

I'm not sure what I want to do yet... I like the work, but the management and union makes me want to leave. We shall see what happens in the end.

[belovedbride07]

This isn't going to be helpful, but I think you are me. LOL. I need to go back and read your previous posts. It sounds like my dilemma is similar to yours, right down to being in the middle of a huge project. I considered looking into a LOA, but I'm not sure that I really want to go back...

[7costanza]

Does your employer allow you to work for someone else or yourself while on leave? Mine would not, so that's something to consider as well. Whatever you decide, I hope you get the break you need!

[pizzapizza]

Aug 11, 2016 22:42:04 GMT -5 belovedbride07 said:

This isn't going to be helpful, but I think you are me. LOL. I need to go back and read your previous posts. It sounds like my dilemma is similar to yours, right down to being in the middle of a huge project. I considered looking into a LOA, but I'm not sure that I really want to go back...

Ha.  I get it.  My first pregnancy I was with the same company and again in the middle of a huge project.  I worked alot during my maternity leave because I am dumb.  I love the flexibility and work from home aspect of the job.  So I don't know.  I may feel differently with two kiddos in daycare.

[imojoebunny]

I took a year leave of absence from my job. It was a big corporation, and not an uncommon thing to do, and they had a formal policy for it, that included reasons other than childbirth. People took it to return to their original countries to care for elderly parents for example (worked with people from all over the world). I decided not go back, but a lot of my coworkers did the same thing, and did come back. Had circumstances been different, like if DH hadn't doubled his salary the year I was home, it would have been great to have the option to go back. My boss was very supportive of the leave, and was very positive when I quit, and said I was welcome back, if I changed my mind at a later date.

[tiptoetulips]

Yes but I was planning on returning. I'm a teacher and took 12 weeks Fmla then took the remainder of the year off (another 10 weeks). We had to do cobra until school resumed. I'm the only person I know from my school that's done a Loa and returned at the end.