Does the woman have no boundaries? (navel gazing)

[sonrisa]

My mother has boundary issues. She will not listen to "no" and will use multiple tactics to try and override anyone who disagrees with her.

The latest issue is that she wants us to start attending "her" church again. "Her" is in quotations because she attends maybe 2-3 times a year. When we came back to the area, we tried to make it work for us. We attended services twice a month, got involved in many activities and tried to help make it become the church we would want to attend. But it isn't. And she knows that.

The initial problems were with the church culture and children's programs. The last straw were some coded racist statements from church members. We will not be returning. She knows this. Yet she's taken it upon herself to crusade for us to return.

Yesterday, she took DD swimming and even though I'd told her just Saturday that we are not going to that church, she decided to lobby my kid about it. WTF? WTF?

[Deleted]

Annoying as hell.

[followyourarrow]

Talking to your kid about it crosses a major line in my opinion. I'd need to have a come to Jesus meeting about it.

[momof2]

Honestly, I would limit access to my kid. It would not mean cutting her off entirely (necessarily), but anyone who did that with my kid would not be alone with them again for a long time. And, I would not even talk to your mom about it (since it will do no good). If she asks why she isn't taking them anywhere on her own, I would tell her why one time and then not speak of it again.

[sonrisa]

Yeah, it the combo of (1) going to the kids and (2) on something important that really pisses me off. This is a line beyond her usual meddling.

[sparkythelawyer]

Yeah, the point where she went to my kid would be the point where I would be going to her ass and handing it to her.

[litebright]

She knows about the coded language being used with you guys and she's still lobbying, and going to your child about it? Man. I would be so angry.

Have you found a new church? Do you think she might back off if/when you do? I'm sorry she's being a PITA about this, it sounds like you've been clear with her and she just doesn't want to hear it.

[speckledfrog]

Well. She just poked the bear.

[puddleofgrace]

Shit like this is why I won't let my mom babysit. LOL

[Deleted]

I would not allow her alone with my child for a VERY long time and I would tell her exactly why when she ( your Mom, not your kid) asked.

[Deleted]

Sept 19, 2016 11:48:05 GMT -5 followyourarrow said:

Talking to your kid about it crosses a major line in my opinion. I'd need to have a come to Jesus meeting about it.

I see what you did there...

[jreeds]

My mother pulls shit like this. It's one of the (many) reasons I do not allow her alone with my kids. I can put up with a lot of bullshit, but manipulating my kids is unacceptable.